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heartbreak2014 · Feb 23, 2011, 12:46 PM

Okay, so we've been friends for over a year, and have been dating for 7 months. We're in a long distance relationship and will be for awhile if we stay together(school and stuff) and I KNOW he's crazy in love with me, and I tell him I love him too. But.. if any other guy asked me out I'd break up with him and date this other guy. And I'd feel completely horrible about it but I want a real relationship, and I know I sound sefish but I just can't take I anymore. He still has a lot to learn, he grew up wayyyy different from I did and has/had a much better life and family and friends and we're.. different. He's careful and I'm risky, I love adventure, he plays it safe. I love to be loud and have fun, and he just wants to keep me safe. And he's just.. perfect. He treats me perfectly and I know if we were together in real life then we'd be perfect. But we're not and.. I don't know what to do. My heart is telling me to let him know how I feel, but my mind doesn't want to hurt him, and I think I just want that feeling of knowing I'm loved by someone. Any advice? Thanks in advance

Wondergirl · Feb 23, 2011, 12:53 PM

I think you want a "sure thing" and not be boyfriendless.

Why be "exclusive"? Date all sorts of guys. Have fun. That's how you figure out what works for you and how you find the best fit.

Cat1864 · Feb 23, 2011, 01:18 PM

If you don't have the same feelings for him that he has for you, then you are using him (as a safety net, if nothing else) until something better/closer comes along. That is not good for either on of you.

Which do you think would hurt less:

1. Telling him the truth and letting him go to find someone who wants to be with him (even if it is long distance.)

Or

2. Dumping him when someone closer to you asks you out or you end up cheating on him because you still don't want to hurt him by telling him the truth (and what he doesn't know won't hurt him, or will it?)

You are very different people and, while opposites can attract, a relationship between opposites takes a lot of work. A long distance relationship takes a lot of work. They also take a lot of trust. While he may trust you to stay faithful, I don't think you trust yourself.

Be kind to both of you and let go now before you cause a larger mess.