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    taytuck22's Avatar
    taytuck22 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:00 PM
    Ideas for comedic monologues
    I would write it but just an idea because my mind is drawing blank
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #2

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:02 PM

    For a male or female?

    For how long?
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    taytuck22 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:06 PM
    Comment on Wondergirl's post
    Female and from 3 to 5 minutes its my final for my drama class
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    #4

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:08 PM

    Does it have to be your idea, or can it be written already?
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    #5

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:11 PM
    Comment on Wondergirl's post
    I would prefer it to be an idea because I would feel bad taking credit for someone else's writing because the project we have to write and perform a monologue
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    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #6

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:17 PM

    How about something about smoking/not smoking? Guys who don't "get it" and won't give up when they get dumped (and keep chasing the girl like a needy puppy)?

    Here's a site with classic, short monologues. Maybe one will spark an idea --

    Comic Monologues for Women
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    #7

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:24 PM
    Comment on Wondergirl's post
    I was going more comedic not serious, but I already looked at this website before, I didn't really seen anything
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    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #8

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:29 PM

    By comedic, you want your audience falling off their chairs laughing?

    Wait! I helped someone with a monologue recently. Let me search the site for it.
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    #9

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:30 PM
    Comment on Wondergirl's post
    Uea I want people to fall out of their seats
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    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #10

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:42 PM

    Preparation: Talcum powder in your hair will make it look grey and old, or use a silver wig? Do you have any old lady clothes? Or wear a taller person's dress and layer colors and patterns that don't fit and match. Wear a cardigan sweater if you have one. (Old ladies always have shawls or sweaters on.) Do you have an old woman's church hat? You might want to wear clunky dark-colored shoes or fuzzy slippers or old sneakers with knee socks. The weirder the clothes, the more authentic you will look. Google for images of old women to get an idea.

    Read over the monologue several times. I added motions you can do and put them in brackets. You don't have to memorize it, but know the progression of the story. Be sure to follow the bracketed motions or at least pause and slap your knee and chuckle or cackle a lot or shake your head or add a lot of body language and facial expressions (mouth open wide in surprise or horror now and then). Be very expressive with your face and body. Don't talk fast. Talk like an old lady -- quavery and shaky voice from time to time, and slow.

    After you're comfortable with the wording, perform it for a friend or your sib or a parent.

    Good luck -- wish I could be there to watch your performance!

    Monologue:

    [Walks on stage] I'm a-gunna tell you-all a story.

    [Sits down] Me and Grandpa Gerald went on a holiday with the family. We went to this Land of Disney place. It was like nothing I had ever seen before! [looks surprised or amazed] Back when we was kids, we never had any of those fancy-pantsy theme parks. [shakes head no] And we had a whole 20 cents to spend at the county fair -- and that was like Christmas!

    Anyway, ridin' in the car with the vibration of the engine made Grandpa Gerald want to "go" a lot [raises eyebrows and smirks]. We had to make a pit-stop about every hour. Old coot! [chuckles, slaps knee] When we finally got to the Land of Disney, he was pretty tuckered out and didn't want to walk much. And there sure was a lot of walkin' to do! [slaps both hands on top of thighs]

    There were hellie-copter rides, but they cost a lot -- a REAL lot. Fifty dollars for fifteen minutes-- can you imagine?? And us'ns being old pensioners, fifty dollars was like a treasure. But Grandpa Gerald wanted to sit down for a spell. He really liked the idea of gettin' up so high above everything. [raises arms in the air] We argued back and forth and people started starin ' at us and movin' away. ["tsk, tsk" shakes head again]

    Then the pilot came over and said he'd make a deal with us. He'd take us for a hellie-copter ride for free (can you imagine?! ). [look surprised] He said it would be free on the condition that we didn't say ONE word during the flight. Not ONE word! If we said even ONE word, we'd have to pay $50.

    Grandpa Gerald really wanted to go [raises eyebrows or rolls eyes] It turned out he meant to a bathroom. [chuckles] I still thought it was a waste of money. When Grandpa Gerald got back, I finally gave in. Fifty dollars, and we wouldn't utter a peep. Fifty dollars is fifty dollars.

    We climbed into the copter thing, and off we went! It was really scary flying straight up so fast, but we didn't say one word. After all, fifty dollars is fifty dollars! Then the pilot made the copter spin around in circles. [moves head around and around] Grandpa Gerald and I got soooooooooo dizzy. We clenched our dentures together and didn't make a sound! [snaps mouth shut with a click] Fifty dollars is fifty dollars! The pilot even made the copter do a cartwheel. Whoa, Nellie! I almost lost my breakfast, [holds stomach and gags] but didn't utter a peep 'cause fifty dollars is fifty dollars!

    Finally, we landed, and the pilot shouted over his shoulder, "I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you two didn't say one single word. I'm really impressed!"

    [chuckles, looks at the audience] "I nearly said somethin' when Grandpa Gerald flew out the door during one of those spins, but fifty dollars is fifty dollars!"
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    #11

    Jan 12, 2011, 06:53 PM
    Comment on Wondergirl's post
    Its not really my style here, I really like to do phyical comedy and just striaght out crying laughing stuff and I don't want actually monolouges because I feel like I'm cheating but ideas would just be great
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    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #12

    Jan 12, 2011, 07:45 PM

    I've given you all I can. You're on your own now.
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    #13

    Jan 12, 2011, 07:55 PM
    Comment on Wondergirl's post
    K thanks

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