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    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 10, 2011, 03:46 PM
    I'm pregnant at the age of 15 and need advice on what to do! Help
    I am only 15 years old and pregnant. I don't have anyone to help me out. I need some advice for what to do and I need someone to talk to. I'm freaking out majorly!

    I no that having sex is wrong I didn't no what to do it kind of just happened. I'm not slut or anything so please do not judge me or say **** and crap about me.

    I'm 10 weeks pregnant already. I'm scared to do anything I just need some advice please help me!
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #2

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:18 PM
    Find a phonebook or go online for the nearest Planned Parenthood. They can advise about ALL your options and are everywhere, and if not near enough to you, they will know what type of place is - a clinic, etc. At your age, you should tell your mother. Please answer below if you won't do that.
    Eva23's Avatar
    Eva23 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:19 PM
    Well where are your parents? Can't they help you out? Now if you didn't want to get pregnant, then you shouldn't have had sex. You are way to young to even be thinking about it. You had your whole life ahead of you and now, your life is going to be stressful and hard.
    To answer your question, just sit your parents down and have a long talk with them like a mature adult. In the meanwhile, your not very long in your pregnancy and you could still get a job to save money. Good luck with everything and have a strong happy and healthy baby.

    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #4

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:29 PM

    Have you seen a doctor? Have you decided if you're keeping the baby? Have you started prenatal vitamins? Have you told your parents? Have you told the father?

    Right now the main thing is getting on prenatal vitamins (you can purchase them over the counter) and tell your parents.

    Yes, they'll be shocked, they'll be angry, they may scream, cry, or a number of things. In the end, they're your parents, and hopefully they'll step up and help you through this.

    You do have options, but some of the options are time sensitive. If you choose abortion, you will need your parents consent (in most places) because of your age. Also, you're 10 weeks along. Most places won't do an abortion after the first trimester is over, so this is something you should think about if abortion is something you're considering.

    There's also adoption. Planned Parenthood can help you with these decisions. They have counselors you can talk to to help you choose what you want to do.

    Of course option 3 is having and keeping the baby. Think long and hard about this. You're 15. You likely cannot support yourself, much less you and a child. There are programs available to help teen moms, but it won't be easy, no matter how much help you get.

    So, tell mom and dad, get on the vitamins, talk about what you want to do about this. We can help lead you in the right direction, or help once you've made a decision, but right now the next step is up to you.
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:41 PM
    Comment on Altenweg's post
    Hey. I don't really have any connection with anyone. I'm not allowed to see my dad and hardly ever see my mum. I have no contact with the baby's father. This was a big mistake and I've got no idea about abortions or apdotion and I can't raise a baby.
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:43 PM
    Comment on joypulv's post
    Who else do I tell if I hardly ever see my mum and she don't care about me.
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:45 PM
    Comment on Eva23's post
    Hey.. I hardly ever see my parnets so they can't really help. I didn't no that it was happening until I relised during it. And there are hardly any jobs that I can have they are mainly all 16 and over. And thank you :)
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #8

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:50 PM

    Who is taking care of you? You're not old enough to be on your own.

    Who is your legal guardian? That's who you have to talk to.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #9

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:54 PM

    Ok, who do you live with a aunt ? A uncle, do you live in foster care, if you don't live with mom and dad you live with someone ?

    Talk to the guardian who is over you, if your parents are not the ones who raise you.
    You have told us who is not there, so who is.

    Go to the nearest county clinic with the person who is your guardian, There are plenty of great care places, planned parenthood is not one of them, that is the last place I would send a young pregnant tenn.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #10

    Jan 10, 2011, 05:01 PM

    Chuck, I don't know much about Planned Parenthood. We don't have them in Canada. I've always recommended them on this site because others have spoken highly of them.

    Not to change the subject, but what's wrong with PP? Any particular reason you're not in favor of them? It would be good to know so I don't recommend them in the future.
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Jan 10, 2011, 05:32 PM
    Comment on Altenweg's post
    I live at my mums. My mum is but she's working at night and comes bk at the day and I'm out during the day.
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Jan 10, 2011, 05:34 PM
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    I live with a whole bunch of people at my mums but its compacated about who I'm getting lookedafter by
    Wats planned parenthood? Is it like family planning?
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Jan 10, 2011, 05:36 PM
    Comment on Altenweg's post
    What is planned parenthood. We don't have them in new zealand. I think we got family planning but I don't no what they do.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #14

    Jan 10, 2011, 05:50 PM

    Ok, this is sort of important, stay home and talk to mom,
    Mom does not work 24 hours a day, call her, go see her,

    You pretended to be an adult by having sex, so now it is time to grow up and start taking responsibility for your actions. You need to start saying what you can't do and do some things,

    1. talk to your MOM, now, today, pick up a phone and call her

    2. I will assume you are in school at our age, talk to a couseler at school.
    Pregnancy Help Inc. Canterbury, Community Services in Shirley, Christchurch City - finda.co.nz

    Pregnancy Help | Confidential Support for Women and their Families

    Pregnancy Help Inc - Information for New Zealand Parents - Kiwi Families
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #15

    Jan 10, 2011, 06:01 PM

    I agree with Chuck, it's time to talk to mom about this.

    You can't keep making excuses. This isn't going to go away. You're pregnant, there's a life growing inside of you. If you're going to carry this baby to term than you need to do the responsible thing and make sure it gets the best possible start you can give it. For that you need medical care, you need prenatal vitamins, you need to be seen regularly by your doctor.

    If you decide on abortion, which is an option, than it will have to be soon. You start your second trimester in 2 weeks. I don't know of any abortion clinics that will do an abortion after it's gone to the second trimester. Maybe in New Zealand they do, but not where I am. So you need to tell your mom today, as soon as she comes home. Or call her, tell her that you need to talk to her, that it's important. You need to discuss all your options with her. You need to decide if you're carrying this baby to term, or if you're aborting it.

    You can't just sit around doing nothing. This is a done deal. You can't wish this away. You're pregnant, and like it or not you do have to be mature enough to handle this.

    This is what we adults mean when we tell you teens to wait for sex. This is why. There are consequences you just aren't ready for. Well, you're going to have to be ready, because you don't have a choice anymore.
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #16

    Jan 10, 2011, 06:01 PM
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    Thanks. But like we never talk like it just turns into argueing. And atm we are on holidays and the new school year starts in about 2 or 3 weeks and I would prefer to keep the school out of it. And thanks for the links :)
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #17

    Jan 10, 2011, 06:03 PM
    Comment on Altenweg's post
    How do I tell my mum?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #18

    Jan 10, 2011, 06:08 PM

    Best method you and the boy go together and tell her.

    Wost method, send her a text message on the phone,

    But at this point even the worst method is better than not at all. She is going to find out, she is going to know when you start showing or when you start carrying a baby around.

    Again, stop making excuses, just do it and get it over with
    Freakedoutt's Avatar
    Freakedoutt Posts: 28, Reputation: 1
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    #19

    Jan 10, 2011, 06:10 PM
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    I don't know the guy. And bloody hellim not making excuses you don't get the position I am in.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #20

    Jan 10, 2011, 06:22 PM

    Actually more than you know, things are bad, won't get better, so the boy is not going to be there for you. Not the first time that happened either.

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