[lorijnsx3]

My boyfriend and I have been together for about six months, not a long time I know however I fell in love with him. When we first got together he told me he was bisexual. I am okay with his sexuality but now that we are in a committed relationship and talking about marriage I am having a hard time dealing with it. He left me in the middle of the night to go and meet a guy for sex, he says nothing happened but who really knows the truth. I was crushed and its something I will not forget. Also, there have been numerous messages through myspace and Facebook of him trying to hook up with guys. Over the past few months he has been really insensitive to the things he says to me... it feels like I never get compliments, only criticism. One night I walked in on him getting ready to masturbate to a picture of a guy, that was not such a big deal to me accept for the fact that my needs are not being met sexually. I want him to be romantic and make love to me but what I get from him is, "hey lets f**k"... at times he will act like he is ready to have sex and then all of a sudden he says no. I feel teased and let down. He changed the passwords to his emails and such and I feel its because he is trying to hide something from me. He is constantly calling me a ***** because I get angry with him and the way he treats me. I've tried to talk to him seriously about our relationship but he can't make it through an adult conversation. He usually ends up saying something smart or making a joke of it. Not to mention that he can never accept responsibility for his actions and everything gets turned around to be my fault. I'm not happy mentally, emotionally, or physically but I do love him and want to salvage what we first had. What do I do?

[CravenMorhead]

How old are you? I don't mean to be callous, but you need to be 18+ to post or get advice on this board. The quicker the better because I have a lot of things to say to you.

[lorijnsx3]

I am 26

[CravenMorhead]

Dump him.

Seriously; dump him.

You've found a guy who is cheating on you. Just because he is bisexual doesn't mean he can have a boyfriend and a girlfriend. The fact that he is going out for sex, regardless of the gender of the person he is going out to have sex with, is a sign that he doesn't want a monogamous relationship. Which seems important to you.

If that isn't enough, he is being harsh and insulting towards you. Lack of respect. That what you want to live with for the rest of your life?

Lastly you aren't getting the physical and emotional intimacy that you crave. This won't change. Don't throw good money after bad here. I know you're talking marriage but I can almost guarantee this will end in a divorce. It is only six months. I think that has been a good time to figure out whether he is good relational material.

It doesn't look like he is meeting your needs. Dump him.

[Synnen]

I am bisexual.

Bisexuality does NOT mean you get to have a boyfriend AND a girlfriend. It ONLY means that you are attracted to both sexes.

He doesn't get a free pass to go have sex with guys, unless you agreed on that in the beginning of your relationship. If not, dump him for cheating. If so, break up with him because you don't want that kind of relationship anymore.

Either way, this is a toxic relationship, and you need to leave it. Not because he's bisexual, but because he treats you like crap.

[kp2171]

Six months is long enough to fall in love. Early love, but love that might build into a Bigger Badarse Love.

And short enough to take out a sharp blade and cut-n-run.

I am so sorry for where you are.

You are trying to do the work here he is not going to do.

He isn't.

And you need to not focus on time spent or time in love... because if this was how he behaved at day 1 you would (I hope) have said Hell No...

It really, really sucks when the person you love treats you worse than a stranger theyd meet.

I don't have problem with his "problem solving" as long as he also is helping you get yours, since... you know... you are a couple... right?

His hands on his body are not my concern. And not yours.

His neglect of your needs is an issue. He isn't right for you? You aren't right for him? Both? Whatever...

I am so sorry you are here. I've been with a lover, whom I Loved Deeply, who changed in short time... and it was maddening. Humiliating. Frustrating.

It was not right.

It happens.

So... its time to step forward.

I think you are going to go mad with suspicion about other lovers or at best the fantasy of seeking others out.

I think you need more focus on you and only you.

And I think you deserved to be chased. To be pressed against a wall and to have your lips touching his be the absolute center of his world at that moment.

...

I know... from personal experience... that it is so much more complicated than that.

And it isn't.

You are hurting. Remember that.

He is not working hard for your love. Remember that.

You get to choose whether to stay or walk. Own that.

You deserve more than this. His orientation, motivation, actions... doesn't change this.

[jenniepepsi]

That's Something Everyone Needs To Remember To Ask Themselves In Any Relationship When They Think It May Be Falling Apart.

"if I Were Single And Met Someone Who Acted Like This, Would I Still Date Them??"

If The Answer Is No Way In Hell, Then Chances Are, You Should Probably Leave The Person You Are With. Little Things We Can Live With. Little Differences And Idiosyncrasies, Can All Be Dealt With And Accepted. But The Big Things, Are Just Too Hard To Get Through.