[Devorameira]

There are all types of preferences out there. Some guys prefer heavier women, some skinny minnies. Some people put too much emphasis on looks and not enough on the person. Panhead is right - it's just shallow.

In your post, I noticed that you said you're worried that a "hot skinny guy" won't fall for you. Maybe you need to look beyond the exterior too.

[kctiger]

Sounds to me like you don't love yourself, or think very highly of yourself. If you have a problem with being overweight, why don't you do something about it? You deserve to be happy with yourself and you will never find someone to love you if you can't first love yourself.

It isn't all about looks. I can't speak for all the guys in the world, but I love confident, driven women who know they NEVER need a guy to validate themselves worth. I think the key to your goals are to boost your own self confidence first.

[answerme_tender]

Your still young, and I can remember how important being accepted meant. Actually when you are looking for a potential partner it shouldn't depend on his looks. Take a closer look at how he presents himself, Im not talking clothes, does he appear to have confidence in himself without being cocky. Does he seem to be laughing and having fun with friends, without having to drink and be stupid. Integrity is a life long value that you should be looking for it will always be there, even under wrinkles and grey hair!!

Its time for you to recognize your own worth, stop depending on what others standard are, the only ones that count are yours at the end of day. Stop sitting back, watching and wishing for something that is never going to just come to you like magic. You are going to have you do something about it YOURSELF! If you feel that your overweight, then get a workout buddy, if you feel your shy, take a class that will help you be able to speak in public atmospheres. Ask a school counselor for advice on how you can get started, you have to take those first foot steps yourself!!

[jmw0713]

If the guys you're after only care about looks, then they are not the right guys for you. Plain and simple. Relationships based solely on looks are only fueled by lust anyway. That all fades after a while.

Like others have said: Build up your confidence. Look beyond looks. Get out, make friends and have fun. If you do those few things a great guy will come along.

[ramona_]

All teenage girls question their sexual preference at one point or another. No, I don't think you're a lesbian, I think you might just be curious, looking at other girls bodies is just curiosity.. subconsciously you're actually comparing yourself to them which is the "jealousy" you mentioned.. there's nothing wrong with that. If your preference is men and you have no intention on kissing/dating a girl then you're not gay.

[Jstar00000]

I cry a lot about things so I like having friends I could tell how I feel. And since I been bullied before I have this constant fear of losing friends for little things so I say sorry a lot. My friends tell me not to say sorry a lot but I don't think they understand why I get nervous breakdowns and say sorry. I have this best friend who I talk to when I feeling down who always listens to me and I tell her the truth about how Im feeling about things. One day I found out the guy I love to death is Muslim and since I am christian I can never be with him. I told my friend this and she help me feel better but then all of a sudden she started to feel bad about it and stopped talking to me and getting mad at me. I kept telling her to not feel bad because I don't feel bad anymore. The once we settled things we started talking about that guy I like and she began to talk about the guy she liked too. Then I told her that I won't feel bad if I don't get the guy. And then she stopped texting me. I said my sorries again and when and cried soooo much. I don't think this behavior is normal. I wouldn't be like this if it wasn't for the bulling and loneliness I thought she would do the same things she did when I told her about the guy. Then Im afraid I overreacted and shell leave me. I need help soooooon this just happened today dec 7... she doesn't forgive things like this easily. I wish there was someone out there that can give me sweet caring words that can cheer me up and calm me down as well as a solution to this problem. Also I need help with dealing with my broken heart for this guy. Thanks =)

[name_]

Different looks are attractive to different people. One day you'll find someone who likes you exactly the way you look. You might also find after a while of not finding someone attractive, they become attractive to you as you get to know them better. It's like their personality shines out and they become irresistible. I'm sure this will happen to you at some point, or someone else will get to know you and it'll happen to them!

To make this more likely though you need to work on yourself esteem. If you're genuinely overweight and it makes you miserable then try a sensible diet or a bit of exercise. You don't have to be extreme about it. Also you'll find if you treat yourself well and with respect then others will too. So when you do get interest from a boy, make sure he's not a total tool cos you'll end up getting hurt and that'll in turn damage yourself esteem. Also sleeping around or kissing a lot of people isn't a good idea. I've done the latter and they weren't my proudest moments. In fact, myself esteem plummeted, as I just felt like an object. Sometimes less is more.

Do things you enjoy with friends, dress a bit nicer than normal for no reason sometimes and you'll feel your confidence rising. You don't have to believe you're beautiful, but if you give off an air of confidence you'll in turn become more confident. After that you can try a bit of flirting which believe me works absolute wonders for yourself esteem, just don't take it too far if you're not really interested in them.

Oh and never undervalue kindness. I think it's the most important thing in the world, and if you have that, you WILL be loved.

[Jstar00000]

By looking at my questions do I seem depressed? I cry everyday about something or another. Then for the rest of the day I'm bubbly and happy till something else makes me cry. I can't tell anyone my true feelings
I try to tell my mom she get mad at me and say I am a drama queen and unreasonable which makes me feel worse.
I feel like I hopeless sometimes... Im scared to be depresses I don't want to be.

[Rugbydemon]

First a friend is a friend no matter what your views are. If you like this guy and you can't get passed the fact he's of a different religion then you have to tell yourself to accept the fact that you can't date him because of that. There is nothing saying that you can't date him but it is your belief that Christians and Muslims shouldn't mix so just respect his religion a common term you might know of is love thy neighbor, as for your friend you can say sorry for any offence that you might have said to her and that you would like to continue this relationship because it means something to you should do this TO HER FACE. As for the constant sorry start by relaxing and if you honestly believe what you think then don't apologize but just make sure its not offending any one you say it to which is probably why your friend isn't answering you. Think before you answer or express your beliefs openly but know a true friend is someone who you can confine within and not have to worry about offending them..

Best of luck with the situation

[Rugbydemon]

In Addition to your nervous breakdowns you should go and see a doctor or shrink and talk to them.. it might be scary to u but it might help you in the long run

Again best of luck

[Jstar00000]

Omg I'm so happy my friend help me realize that I don't have to talk much to be cool and that I don't need to worry about being me. Thanks guys for all the tips. Everyone's tips helped by the tooooooons!

[Jessica_Tilton]

No.. You don't sound like a lesbian. I mean I like to see girls too and I don't have the slightest interest to date,kiss or be in a relationship with one considering I'm one. I like to see what they have like their face, breast and other feature. It's OK to look even if you are a lesbian that is you're decision to make. So, don't worry cause you're not a lesbian.

[killerwhales22]

That is normal it is just your hormones

[ITstudent2006]

It's hard to say what could be causing this. How old are you?

[Fr_Chuck]

What type of things are making you cry, how old are you ?

Do you often look for attention ( thus your moms opinion of a drama queen) What would make your mom have that opinion

[Jstar00000]

Friends/lonelyness/ I cry all the time about my weight stuff like that

[redhed35]

Try talking to your mother again,only this time ask her for ideas and tips you can use.

Pick a time when things are quite around the house,then just say,mum I have this problem with my friends,what do you think?

As for your weight,are you over weight? Even if your not exercise will make you feel better,rope in a friend to go for a walk with you or your mum.

If school is the problem talk to a teacher or guidance councillor,that's what their there for.

Talking about it will help.

[ITstudent2006]

I agree with redhead.

Emotions can be overwhelming sometimes and keeping them to oneself and trying to deal with it internally can be very hard and unhealthy. Go through the correct channels and let those able to help you do so.

Keeping things bottled up usually makes the situation look or feel worse then it is. Your mother may not seem helpful but maybe it's the approach you've taken. You are in control of your life, if it's the weight issue then go for a walk/run, exercise, watch your eating habits, seek help from those in similar situations.

This goes for anything. If you feel lonely then participate in local social events, get out and live and have fun. I reliaze I don't know where you live so its hard for me to say what to do, but keeping yourself shacked away with your issues are ismply making them worse.

Good Luck!

[Jstar00000]

My best best friend keeps putting her self down because the guy she has a crush on and loves just started dating someoneles. It's during finals so I'm afraid with all the emotion she is having she would fail. I hug her and try to make her laugh but I don't know if there is something else I should do or am I doing the wrong thing. I don't know if I'm showing the right amount sympathy. I think she is jealous because I just went through the same thing recently (I can't have him because of his religion though) and even with this I am always jolly and happy during the day. I cry at home but she doesn't know about that. But anyway is there anything I can do to help her?

[Jstar00000]

Thanks for the help!! I really appreciate =) it but What if school hw is keeping me from exercising? I get no time for myself should I talk to a councillor about that too?