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    plsadviseme's Avatar
    plsadviseme Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 11, 2010, 03:43 PM
    Sex Life: MIA
    Hey everyone, so I'm new at this but after reading something so similar to my situation, I figured I'll post my own concern and hopefully someone could help me out.

    My boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 yrs and like most relationships, the sex was very much alive in the beginning. But we haven't had sex for the past 8 months now and counting... We had our 2nd year anniversary back in Sept10 and still nothing happened.

    We've talked about this issue over and over again and we think that the more we talk about it, the more it's hard for us to get in the mood. At first I thought it was me, that he wasn't attracted to me anymore, then he tells me it's him. Since he's gained weight, he doesn't feel sexy. I've gained weight too since I started to date him but it doesn't really affect me as much (yeah sometimes) but what makes me feel sexy is if I see that my partner wants me. We don't even passionately kiss that much anymore. It's mostly a peck now. We're still affectionate, just not as passionate.

    A friend of mine suggested for me to read an erotica, but I'm way too shy to get close to those books in a bookstore! I don't find porn helpful. I find it so repetitive, it's silly to me. I've never really done role playing, but I can just see myself giggling. Sometimes I think that I think about this too much that's why it's hard for me to initiate anything with him anymore. But when I used to, I would be rejected because he's not in the mood and now I'm afraid to be rejected.

    This kind of problem have probably been read before... but please help!
    serenemeadow's Avatar
    serenemeadow Posts: 39, Reputation: 16
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Nov 13, 2010, 11:59 PM
    Eight months is a pretty long time. I'm still young so I don't know much, but I think you really need to put more effort if you want sex to happen. Try seducing him, it works for most men. Try to be creative with how you do it too. I can't give concrete examples cause it just feels awkward haha. Need a real expert to post in here :X
    awayandalone's Avatar
    awayandalone Posts: 92, Reputation: 32
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Nov 22, 2010, 04:40 AM
    This may sound weird. But my girlfriend used to take me underwear shopping with her sometimes. Honestly seeing her in something I had picked out or was there to see her pick out for some reason always turned me on. That and she even bought some lingerie once, that definitely set the mood for seduction. Don't be afraid to express yourself to the one you love and want to be loved by.
    Aleeravilu's Avatar
    Aleeravilu Posts: 77, Reputation: 22
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Dec 5, 2010, 07:28 AM
    Well, there's something you should know, there are many types of porn, and they're great help to find the way to get yourself AND your partner to get in the mood. They're not as repetitive as you think, indeed they can give you a lot of tips when it comes to sex.
    You can try to give him a massage or something.
    simoneaugie's Avatar
    simoneaugie Posts: 2,490, Reputation: 438
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    Dec 5, 2010, 06:29 PM

    Would he be willing to pick out some erotica for you? Getting a book for the girlfriend is no big deal for many men. Thumbing through and choosing a really good one might piqué his interest.
    rad0123's Avatar
    rad0123 Posts: 22, Reputation: 5
    New Member
     
    #6

    Dec 6, 2010, 04:21 AM

    Just hang out naked together. Don't have sex or anything, just say its too warm and get naked. Once you guys are both naked, there's no resisting.

    Take showers together. Crawl into bed naked. Just appear randomly in his life... naked.

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