[Stevo6568]

My wife has a “friend” on Facebook and the conversation went WAYYY beyond flirting. They talk about cheating and sex and he even gave her his address and phone number. He said "call me when you get here". I know that he has her cell phone number. I asked her if something was going on and she lied. I found all this out by finding an old e-mail between them that she kept for months. Plus he lives 5 minutes from our house. Should I believe her when she already lied to me?

[beachloverjohn]

No. And she is not hiding it very well. I mean Facebook? C'mon. She doesn't seem to care what you find out. So first you show her the Facebook evidence, then you call a lawyer, then you dump her faster than you can say "facebook".

[Jake2008]

This is one of those questions, with the answer being so obvious, that I think you are here to confirm your own conclusion.

What you don't know now, is how long the 'relationship' has been going on. How often they have exchanged similar email, how often and when they have met, how long she has ditched her marriage vows, how long she has been a liar, etc.

So knowing what is going on, and is going on, I agree that your next move should be at least a separation, followed by counselling to see if she is willing to try to regain your trust, and rebuild the marriage, and for you to decide whether it is worth the effort to allow her that privilege.

Anything short of that, you can expect the same behaviour from her. She won't stop, you need to step this up, figure it out, and make some hard decisions.

[Shadowburn]

Call me when you get here? Mean she's been there.
She's cheating.

[DoulaLC]

I could see some harmless banter and joking around, especially when it is out there for everyone to see, but when it gets to be an exchange of phone numbers, addresses, private e-mail/conversations that still deal with sex and cheating, lying that is hard to believe it could be anything else. And as Shadowburn mentioned, the comment about calling when she gets there?

Time to have a very serious talk with her. If nothing is really going on, she shouldn't have a problem with ending her "friendship" since it should be no big deal to her, just some guy online, while it is red flag to you. She may or may not have cheated physically, but she has in other ways.

[beachloverjohn]

So brazen too. I mean she might as well put up a billboard advertising that she is sleeping around. This is one of the nerviest things I have ever heard. I wouldn't take her back if she was the last woman on earth.