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    luckyaliengirl's Avatar
    luckyaliengirl Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #41

    Dec 13, 2010, 12:18 PM
    Don't wait on the daycare or school to do any kind of testing or whatever you want for confirmation. My daughter is almost 6 now and no one will do anything to help her continue to improve herself except my husband and myself. I had to switch school systems and will know in about a month if the switch is having the desired effect. My child can read and write and so much more, she is very artistic and inquisitive and she comprehends everything and is very excellent at drawing conclusions. She has new ideas and continues to impress me daily. I WISH the school she is now going to would have done something to groom her genius instead of telling me I just think she's gifted because I was. Go to bat for your child, no matter how young!! There is no reason to stunt your child's brain or progress because someone else thinks you're pushing too hard or they are too young. Experts will tell you to let them read or potty or walk or talk at their own pace, especially if they are moving too "slowly" but won't let you push your child a little when they show promise? People are nuts. Do what's right and comfortable for you and the child. If you and others think he/she is gifted then he/she likely is and you should definitely nurture that! Good luck!
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    mrs_deg1983 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #42

    Jan 10, 2011, 12:21 AM
    You know from the sound of it every kid is gifted. I was looking up the same and found all this. My husband though my daughter may be behind but not I am starting to think not. She is 27 months ans she can do that stuff as well. Count to 20 and knows then when they are written out. Knows almost all of her abc but gets flustered on the last four. She knows them written as well. She know almost all shapes. She's great at basket ball ( did not get it from her dad lol) We started her on flash cards at 10 months. And she can do them with out the pictures. When I ask her to get a toy to play she brings be flash cards. She likes those over the leap frog and v tec toys.
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    whotoo Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #43

    Apr 15, 2011, 11:28 AM
    mrs_deg1983,
    I'm no expert, I'm as new to this as you are, but I don't think every kid is gifted. A child who is shown flash cards from 10 months old and goes on to recognise almost all the letters of the alphabet at 27 months is surely clever. But, in my opinion, quite different to a child who is first exposed to the alphabet at 16 months and then by 24 months can actually read by sounding out words using phonics and recognising sight words. Also, it is common for this type of child to have 'led' the development, i.e.. Continuously ask the parent to go through the sounds of the alphabet and play word games that the child has invented. The difference to me is not the knowledge that is acquired, it is the self-led way if is acquired, the speed at which it is learned, that it is learned in such depth and that the child can use it to invent new games.

    That said, it doesn't mean the child will not be surpassed by peers in the future, just that they are different now?
    petersonmommy's Avatar
    petersonmommy Posts: 3, Reputation: 2
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    #44

    Oct 20, 2011, 08:01 PM
    I have to chime in here. I recently had my 2 year old son evaluated, per his pediatrician, for a speech delay. The Early Intervention folks evaluated him, and found him to have a host of issues. Mostly stemming from the fact that he didn't like these two strangers in the house asking him to perform certain tasks. He is very attached to me, and didn't really want to follow their directions. So, their tests came up really low for him, because he wouldn't perform for them. After the testing, the evaluators spent hours at my diningroom table writing up his eval. Well, as they sat there, he "read" through his books, pointing out all the abc's, upper and lower case, counted to twenty, pointed out all kinds of animals and made the sounds they make... and the evaluators said that he would've done better now because he seems comfortable. Anyway, now they basically want him evaluated for Autism Spectrum disorders. I'm so confused. He seems fine to be. When I recently went to a Pediatric Neurologist (for my other son - totally different issue) I mentioned this to her. She told me it's very unusual for him to know his abcs and numbers at this age, and that in and of itself could be a "SIGN". He is a little shy, he is my first, and, he's home with me, and his one year old brother, he has a little speech delay, as did I, but I think he is OKAY! But, I swear, just knowing his abc's, yes, upper and lower case, and numbers up to twenty, made them want to have him evaluated. I feel like this is all getting out of hand!!
    petersonmommy's Avatar
    petersonmommy Posts: 3, Reputation: 2
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    #45

    Oct 20, 2011, 08:10 PM
    And, can I add something? Is it me, or does every parent think that their child is gifted? Why would you want your 2 year old to be reading? Or your three year old? Why would you want them to consider flash cards, or even a Vtech a fun toy?? What happened to toddlers being TODDLERS, playing in the sand, building with blocks, not the parthenon, mind you - just playing?? Parents really start to sound a little over the top I think when they start going on and on about their kids being so gifted. And I have two sons - one who is knows all his abc's upper and lower, he counts correctly up to twenty - yes, for fun, and counts correctly -- never messes up the letters, and is actually trying to read his books. And I never taught them to him. Sesame street? Hello? I'm an elementary school teacher, and a product of montessori schooling... so I do have perspective. I've taught truly gifted kids who have usually had other relatively severe either sensory processing disorders, can't use their hands to write, or organizational issues, or they can't relateto their peers, at all. Ijsut want my son to be "okay"... I'll take b's in school, even the occasional c if he can just be happy. He has been a book reader/page turner, pointer since 6 months. But I pray he's not gifted, I pray he is just him -- and can interact, and have good relationships with others, and have fun -- maybe I'm looking for that because I know how many "gifted" little boys are diagnosed on the autism spectrum later on...
    despinamom's Avatar
    despinamom Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #46

    Oct 21, 2011, 05:55 AM
    @petersonmommy
    My son started reading three months shy of his 3rd birthday on his own. NO vtech. No programs or any fancy methods. (because I don't believe in such things) All I ever did was read to him and answer his questions. And he loved books and letters as an infant.
    And yes, he has a couple of issues relating to being 'gifted'.
    So I think there IS such a thing as being gifted. And I am interested in getting information about what to do with this kind of kid.
    Surely there must be something wouldn't you agree? Don't you think it's unique to have a 3 year old reading at a 7 year old level. Or completing a 65 piece puzzle at 2yrs/3moths old? WITH EASE.
    I don't tell him he's gifted every day. Nor do I focus on it all the time either.

    But I am not about to ignore it completely! That would be stupid of me.
    rainrad2002's Avatar
    rainrad2002 Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #47

    Oct 21, 2011, 03:25 PM
    Wow, there are many wonderful and helpful answers to my questions, this thread is still active which is unbelievable. I am glad I asked some questions that many others are wondering themselves so we can all help each other. There is also a lot of misinformation and ignorance when it comes to this subject and this is quite obvious by some of the comments left here.

    We lived in Australia for many years, and they are notorious for what they call "tall poppy syndrome", which means basically that if any person/child for whatever reason is exceeding the level of others around them (not just in an academic/intellectual way) they will be "brought back down" to the others level. This is a natural human reaction in situations like this. No one wants to feel inferior, like a failure, or substandard and will do what they have to to avoid that, which usually means putting someone else down, criticizing, voicing negative opinions when not appropriate etc. to make themselves feel better.

    Not everyone is the same, no child is the same, and that is a wonderful thing. Insisting that kids who are unusually bright, talented or gifted have been pushed and made that way is very ignorant... and is generally said by people who have no experience, professional or otherwise and has no merit in a conversation about the subject. So I personally pay no attention to the ramblings of people who have no idea what they are talking about and just feel the need to give their opinion.

    There is nothing better or worse about someone having above average intelligence nor is there for someone having below average intelligence or anything in the middle. Just different. There are strengths and weaknesses in everyone regardless of their intelligence level, and we all need help in different areas to become a productive member of society.

    I now have 3 children, and they are nothing alike. They are all wonderful.
    rainrad2002's Avatar
    rainrad2002 Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #48

    Oct 21, 2011, 03:52 PM
    So now for an update, my son is now almost 7. We are certain that he is of above average intelligence, but is having difficulties paying attention and sitting still. His preschool had him assessed for ADHD/ADD when he was 4 by giving him a Brigance Assessment, which he absolutely LOVED taking and wanted to do more which got a chuckle out of the lady giving the assessment. He scored in the 87th percentile which translates to doing better than 87% of his similarly aged peers. No surprise there for us, and he showed no issues with ADHD. Then he was seen by a child psychologist just to make sure there weren't any issues with attention span etc. There were no issues, and the psychologist said that he is just very bright and is probably bored since they were learning in preschool/kindergarten what he already knew at age 2. Ok, that made sense.

    So here we are a few years later and he is still having the problems with sitting still and paying attention when he doesn't want to. Causing disruptions in class by making noises and singing when he is a little bored (like when the class is sitting on the floor for discussion/story time).

    He can read any book we have in the house, writes in cursive, complete sentences, can do addition, subtraction, multiplication and knows the names of an unbelievable array of continents and countries. This is all because he enjoys it. If it is not something he enjoys and is interested in he has real difficulty paying attention.

    So the question for us now is, we know his is very bright. This is no surprise considering his dad's IQ is above 140 and mine is above 120. But we are becoming concerned that there is an issue here that we are not seeing, and it is affecting him negatively. He is otherwise a very happy, content, helpful, affectionate and active little guy. All 3 of our kids spend hours playing together every week, they get more time to do that as they are attending a Montessori school where they don't get much in the way of homework compared to regular 1st and 2nd grade classes. We value playtime as much if not more than doing homework and related academic things, although he will still pick up a globe, book etc while playing and spend time learning countries etc and reading. I caught him drawing 3 dimensional objects like cubes on the driveway with chalk. It's hard to know what to think when your two year old develops a fascination with hexagons, pentagons and other shapes that I had no interest in at that age.

    So, we are now at a point where we know a lot more than we used to about all of this, and will do what we can to help him. My daughter who will be 4 very soon talks circles around him and is learning her colors, shapes, numbers etc. at about the same pace as other kids, maybe a little earlier. My youngest son who is 2 does know shapes and colors, and could really care less about them. He is obsesses with cars, trucks and trains. Basically anything with wheels and will lay on the floor for ages driving them around.

    So as children they are extremely different, and my oldest is definitely needing more "attention" than the other two. Most likely because he is very smart, but his social development is behind. This is normal for kids like him as I have found out from many sources and eventually his social skill will catch up... mostly... : )

    Parents of children who are very smart, bright, gifted etc. need to support each other, and take others uninformed opinions with a grain of salt. Thank you everyone for the wonderful information, and hopefully I have been able to pass on some of the things I have learned in the past 5 years since I started this thread.




    ADmama's Avatar
    ADmama Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #49

    Oct 21, 2011, 04:36 PM
    RainRad2002:
    My son is now 4 and I first responded to your post when he was around 2. Last year my husband and I went to a conference for "gifted" children because we just simply didn't know what else to do. We learned more there than anything and found that a lot of what they were discussing seemed to fit our son (in the early stages anyways). There's just not a lot of info by way of "gifted toddlers" considering they really don't like to test them that early. I can understand why, especially since my son will not be a puppet (as we call it). If you ask him to do something, he most likely won't do it and he's been like that since he was 2, even more so if he doesn't know you. I actually got a chance to chat with the guest speaker Dr James Webb and he said "I don't need to meet with your son to know he's gifted. You will need to be careful because "they" will try to diagnose him with ADHD even though he doesn't have it." As he started preschool this year for the first year, we are already having issues. He's doing great academically however he's already been to the Director's office and he's only been in school 2 months. Apparently he was "acting like the teacher" by telling the children what to do. His version, is that he was trying to help the teachers. So clearly we are already having "behavioral" issues leading in that direction and a disconnect between child and teacher. He's still very social, has a VERY strong personality and likes to talk (a lot) but he's still struggling to connect with other children and we're actually concerned about possible bullying, already (I don't even like that word this young). I've just recently started reading a book called 'Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured Heart Approach'. So far this seems to be giving us some positive results. It focuses on the "good" things the child is doing instead of constantly telling them what they're doing "wrong". We've witnessed less meltdowns and behavior at school is getting a little better as well and I'm not even done with the book yet. I am actually feeling like I'm exerting myself less over his strong will. This book also discusses how these children have so much energy, curiosity and thoughts that they just can't control themselves and shouldn't be faulted for that. We could all only wish we had more energy, right? So this is where we're at currently. I thought some of this could possibly help you with your 7yr old. We also moved into a district that has a really good gifted program should he need it. I know not all gifted children excel at every subject so I'm OK with him not being in a gifted program, I just want him to get the education he needs and make friends at the same time. That's such a struggle for these children.

    Well I think I've given more than my 10 cents. I hope your 7yr old can really find his niche. I'm sure he will.
    lorenalu's Avatar
    lorenalu Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #50

    Oct 31, 2011, 10:50 AM
    I just visited my 26 months old grandchild. I was in shocked when I saw him reading 40 words, mainly animals, he reads the worlds without looking at the pictures. He also knows his numbers up to 40. His parents both are bilingual, the second language is Spanish, so my grandchild is saying words in English and says them in Spanish as well, such as "zapato-shoe" He knows colors, etc. What amazed me the most is how he can manipulate my son's Apple laptop! He finds his own photos, plays music and games. My question is this normal or above normal for his age. He has been taught numbers and letters since he was 1 year old. I agree with let children be children before "stuffing them like a sausage" but my grandchild looks for his books and does "homework" on his own. Should his parents encourage his learning abilities or also help him be a child?
    I will appreciate any input!
    petersonmommy's Avatar
    petersonmommy Posts: 3, Reputation: 2
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    #51

    Nov 1, 2011, 07:54 AM
    Hi -- I just want to apologize for my flippant answer - I was rude. I apologize. I think I was responding to honestly, a hard week with doctors for both my boys - 1 and 2, different issues with both. But, I just want to write that I apologize for writing in a flippant, disrespectful manner. No excuses. I will add that we should all do what we think is right for our children. They don't have to fit into anyone's box, or diagnosis. Be healthy, be happy, and be grateful. And, again - I'm sorry I was so off the cuff and rude. I do not believe that "every parent thinks their child is gifted" that was a really rude comment. I almost can't believe I wrote that... sorry.
    cindi325's Avatar
    cindi325 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #52

    Nov 3, 2011, 11:12 AM
    My little girl knows all the letters of the alphabet at 16 months old. She knows too many words too count, as well as shapes, colors and number 1-10. She also says phrases like "Happy Birthday Grandma" and "How about that". We've been teaching her. She is thirsty to learn which makes it fun.
    tigerkuan's Avatar
    tigerkuan Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #53

    Dec 2, 2011, 12:49 PM
    gumshoe hit the nail on the head. Gifted children are often bored and miserable when not stimulated properly. The "let kids be kids" "don't push them" arguments are not applicable to gifted children. An average child can be perfectly content with average toys and being surrounded by average children- the gifted child has special needs just like slower children have.
    rainrad2002's Avatar
    rainrad2002 Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #54

    Dec 2, 2011, 01:36 PM
    Thanks again for your input guys, and TigerKuan pointed out what is probably the most important point of all these discussions. Not all kids are the same, need the same things, and can thrive in the save environments. It does seem that our society has a tendency to want to label everything, and the label "gifted" generally brings out strong reactions both negative and positive.

    I am not big on labels and would prefer for my son to avoid that, BUT... we are finding that schools want this information and the labels such as "special needs" and "gifted" etc are necessary for them to operate. Now we are at this point where we have a very good idea of what "label" our son will end up having, and probably a few others as he has some tendencies like feeling the need to make noises and sing and almost cannot control it. His self control is not very well developed either and will still do things like take a toy from another child without asking first, or asking then taking regardless of the other kid's answer even though he knows he shouldn't do it it is VERY difficult for him to control his impulses. :)

    I think some of this is part of the whole "sensory" thing, and it seems many kids like James have some element of this. His is pretty noticeable, so we are expecting some other "diagnoses" from which ever doctor/therapist ends up assessing him. You would think that as soon as the realization hits that a child might be gifted that all these other things would be seen as pretty normal and just leave them alone. That probably won't happen...

    Anyway, it is inevitable that we will need to do this to help him get into the right classes, programs etc at school.

    It is pretty funny that one of these child behavior therapists was at my son's montessori school class observing another student, and apparently ended up getting and eyeful of James and spent quite a bit of time watching him out of sheer curiosity and possibly amazement at what we call James-isms. LOL! The good thing is he passed on much of what he noticed to the teacher who wrote it all down and will share it with us next time we see him. This should be interesting...

    Yes, it certainly would be much simpler if James was more "normal" but it is also wonderful that he is so much his own person regardless of what is going on around him. My mother told me last night that I was the same way in school, and would get bored and wander off to do my own thing. I probably still do that. Hey, what can you do.

    Will keep you all posted since it may help you figure out what to do or not do when you have a child who has different needs than the majority of other children. Life can be so complicated!

    Petersonmommy, don't worry we all understand how it gets when you have kids and things are hectic! :)
    yvonnejkvp's Avatar
    yvonnejkvp Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #55

    Dec 9, 2011, 06:41 AM
    My daughter knows alphabet a-z & also knows sounds, she can count up to ten & also knows all her colors... She is 18 months... I think they are a little above average kids but nothing to be alarmed:) kids now a days just know more:)
    rainrad2002's Avatar
    rainrad2002 Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #56

    Dec 9, 2011, 08:38 AM
    YvonneJKVP, she sounds like a normal little Girl. Not sure why you are posting in a thread about gifted children unless she has some traits you have not mentioned yet... :)
    hstavely's Avatar
    hstavely Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #57

    Jul 12, 2012, 09:27 PM
    Think it is a good question you are asking. Would be good for an assessment assthen you would know and it can be a help. Teaching oneself to read at 3 is a sign of being 'Gifted', my son did this and I had him assessed at 4 years as not sure whether to send to school or not. He also did the other things you talk about. It did not come from me, we went with his interests but he just wanted to learn. His interests were letters, numbers etc. I remember the first time I was in the car with him at 3 years and he suddenly said that says open 24 hours and he was reading the 7/11 store sign. I had not encouraged or tried to amek him do this. It is important to get some understanding of any needs, that is what you do as parents, not o make him any more special that anyone else. Plus look at social etc. My son at kinder had trouble understanding why the other kids could not folow the rules, as he understood them. He is now 17 and at university here, now he can pursue what he likes, which is physics. It helped us to have an assessment just to understand what he could need and also how qucikly he was pcicking things up. It does not have to change his life or yours. It is just knowledge.
    Aspergersis's Avatar
    Aspergersis Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #58

    Nov 18, 2012, 02:32 PM
    My daughter is 19 months old, she can speak- as in hold a conversation, she will tell you in full sentences "My Daddy is gone to work-beep beep", " It's rainy and cold outside", she is almost frightening. Read numbers and letters, tell you words that begin with particular letters, she knows all of her shapes including kite! She can identify animals in Irish- (we're Irish), she can take off her own coat and put her shoes on. I'm terrified because my older brother has Asperger's and I know how hard life has been and still is for him. My daughter is sociable and loving, gives eye contact and is not apparently socially awkward nor is she phased by new situations but then she'll turn around and say, " Mummy, Rita's clock on way, clock say 5, 6" at half past 5! Am waiting for her developmental check to bring this up with the public health nurse, any advice would be appreciated. Thanks.
    Mrsbus10's Avatar
    Mrsbus10 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #59

    Mar 7, 2013, 08:48 PM
    My daughter is 25 months old and she can recite her whole alphabet since she was 18 months and has known the whole alphabet by sight since 20 months old. She can count to 20 and recognizes all numbers by sight. She has a vocab of over 300 words and talks in full sentences. She can do almost any puzzle you throw at her and she can read some 3 and 4 letter words. I think it honestly just depends on how much you work with them and take the time to teach them... I've worked with my daughter since day one and she is very very gifted!
    LadyToni's Avatar
    LadyToni Posts: 32, Reputation: 5
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    #60

    May 11, 2013, 08:06 PM
    As an adult that watched her best friend go to the 'gifted' school when we were 9 I urge you to see what going the gifted route really means. She couldn't play outside after school anymore because she had tons of homework, when she did come out to play she had new words that she didn't know the meaning of, we didn't know the meaning of either but she could spell the word. Gifted programs can give a boost to something that is of interest to the child but from my experience gifted programs push into the child lots of things that aren't relevant to the child's everyday life. Let your son be a kid, give him extra stuff at home to challenge his mind.

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