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armz29 · Dec 21, 2006, 01:03 PM

Do I have mental illness?I can't control my anger always.. I easily get mad and want to turned something to a big fight always..

How do I deal with my anger management problem?is there any medication for this?

J_9 · Dec 21, 2006, 01:33 PM

Why do you do this? That is the question. I don't believe it is necessary a mental illness in the way that some people think of mental illnesses, but rather a personality problem maybe?

Why do you feel the need to get angry?

armz29 · Dec 21, 2006, 01:47 PM

I don why I can't control my anger management.. I don't know if I am the only problem or my husband does too.. I know we have too many differences because we are not from the same country.. he is insensitive and I am very sensitive.. everytime we argue it will end up to a big fight.. I don't know if I have mental illness or I have anger management problem.. I can't take the "NO"answer.. whenever I will tell him something whether its useful for me and not fro him.. he always contradicts my opinion and my decision.. I always needs his permission even for just little things.. thats make me real angry.. I feel tat I don't have freedom in so many things..

Dragonfire24 · Dec 21, 2006, 01:57 PM

Have you sought professional help?

nwsflash · Dec 21, 2006, 02:05 PM

It sounds that you and your husband could do with some marriage guidance so that you could have some help with dealing with the issue's that you both seem to be having with one another, it also sounds that there may be some cultural issue's that you bring up about you both coming from different countries. What may be OK in your country or his may be totally different to what you are both used to and now facing in married life

For the anger problem the above may help a little but there are also some good anger manager courses that you can attend, both of this options should be available from your local doctors or health center near to were your living.

armz29 · Dec 21, 2006, 02:17 PM

Who needs to go counselling?both of us or just me?how can I convince him to send me to professionals for help.. whats the best way to calm myself down when we start arguing?how can I stop myself from getting more angry with him?

sadiesmom · Dec 21, 2006, 04:47 PM

Marriages are difficult enough between a man and a woman, but add in the factor that you are from a different country makes it more difficult. Do you have any family or friends you can talk too? Do you and your husband attend church? What kind of things do you need his permission for? Both of you would benefit from marriage counseling. Now about the anger...There are a lot of things you can do to calm yourself down. You can count to 10, do deep breathing exercises, relaxation exercises, etc. An example of what you usually argue about would be helpful. I have learned that the root of anger is usually hurt. I look for the hurt when someone is angry and then we know what the real problem is. It sounds like you have a lot of hurt. Your husband may never change; but, you can change the way you feel when he disagrees with you.