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lilmzcrrazi · Jul 31, 2010, 04:02 PM

I don't think I'm "BEATUFITUL,SEXY,HOT,ETC." I wake up thinking I'm a OK looking person. Im turning 16 in a month and I'm a girl. I haven't even had my first kiss, first boyfriend or anything like that yet. I don't get what's wrong with me.. I really want to have that experience have a boyfriend my first kiss someone to talk to all night, heartbreaks, all the teenage things. I don't think I'm a boring person either I'm pretty fun, funny, crazy at times, but pretty shy when you first meet me. Everyone tells me I have a hot body but I don't want to be liked for my body I want to be liked for who I am.. a few guys have told me they really liked me but that was in middle school. Im going to 11th grade and not one guy has asked me out or anything. I hate sounding desperate but I just don't get why I can't have a boyfriend :l

positiveparent · Jul 31, 2010, 05:56 PM

Hi OP, I know to you its seems drastic that you haven't had a boyfriend or been kissed yet. Of course I also know that at 16 it means a lot, I can help you get kissed, when you next see your Dad kiss him, then you'll have at least been kissed.Ok I am just trying to help get you to smile, once you smile, things will look much better.

Do you have any boys for friends ? If you do could you perhaps ask one of them if they think your maybe coming across as unapproachable, or stand offish, or stuck up, it happens, and we don't always realise how we appear to others so if you have male friends always a good idea to ask them.

Perhaps you're trying to hard to be liked or noticed? Which can also put boys off. I know you possibly think 16 is old, or to have not been kissed etc, Its not you know, Lots of girls are still in same situation as you, they just hide it well.

All I can really say to you about getting around this obstacle, is be friendly smile a lot, speak to boys first, say hello to them if you know them and smile, smiling puts other people especially boys at ease, and when boys feel at ease then that's when they're likely to ask you to go on a date with them.

Smiling great for all things actually, and don't know if you've noticed but girls who laugh a lot and smile a lot are usually the girls who get asked out or talked to most.

Apart from this, I can just advise you to smile smile and smile, more, be friendly, go out to clubs and dance, dancing is also a good way to meet up with boys, then you get talking, and things go from there.

If you're mostly happy and friendly Im sure it won't be long before you're on the top of most boys ask out list. So just try to be a friendly and happy person, and you'll soon notice a difference. Try it. Just Smile..

lilmzcrrazi · Aug 3, 2010, 04:59 PM

Thank you that really did make me smile and the thing is when people meet me the first thing they mention is " you smile so much ".. I am friendly but I'm shy sometimes but your right thank you ill ask one of my guy friends right now what they think

martinizing2 · Aug 3, 2010, 05:14 PM

From a male point of view, I think I still when I was 16...

You probably have several boys who are wanting to work up the courage to approach you. But boys at that age are just learning how to do this and may take a little time.

Don't be in a big hurry. It will happen. From how it sounds to me you will end up with so many you'll get swarmed.

Positiveparent gave some good advice and it seems you are acting on it. Good idea , she is a great help and good to listen to.
The part about kissing your dad cracked me up too.

I wish you well.

Kitkat22 · Aug 3, 2010, 07:31 PM

You'll meet the right one. Be choosy and don't settle for just anyone. It'll happen.

Homegirl 50 · Aug 3, 2010, 07:44 PM

Originally Posted by lilmzcrrazi

I dont think im "BEATUFITUL,SEXY,HOT,ETC." i wake up thinking im a ok looking person. Im turning 16 in a month and im a girl. I havent even had my first kiss, first boyfriend or anything like that yet. I dont get whats wrong with me.. i really want to have that experience have a boyfriend my first kiss someone to talk to all night, heartbreaks, all the teenage things. I dont think im a boring person either im pretty fun, funny, crazy at times, but pretty shy when you first meet me. Everyone tells me i have a hot body but i dont wanna be liked for my body i wanna be liked for who i am.. a few guys have told me they really liked me but that was in middle school. Im going to 11th grade and not one guy has asked me out or anything. I hate sounding desperate but i just dont get why i can't have a boyfriend :l

The first thing you said about yourself is I dont think im "BEATUFITUL,SEXY,HOT,ETC." i wake up thinking im a ok looking person. Im turning 16 in a month and im a girl. I havent even had my first kiss, first boyfriend or anything like that yet. I dont get whats wrong with me.. Then you said people tell me I have a hot body but I don't want to be liked for my body.
While I understand what you are saying and respect you for it, perhaps all of those negatives you first mentioned about yourself are reflected in how you carry yourself.
It's like you saying "don't look at me unless you want to know me"
I can understand that feeling but instead of thinking of what you are not believe in who you are and it will reflect in the way you carry yourself.
You sound like a very fun girl, probably prettier than you think, you may be shy but you are fun. Just be you. Let people see you and that boy who has probably watching from the sidelines will approach you.

I can really relate to you, that was me at your age. I confided in my older brother and he told me what I am telling you. You may be throwing off "back off unless you are serious" vibes and teenage boys don't get that. Relax and be you.
I wish you well

ITstudent2006 · Aug 3, 2010, 07:57 PM

I agree with the above O.P. truly feeling that you're ugly, fat, broing etc... usually means you represent yourself in this way. Why don't you think your beautiful? Because you don't look like Jessica Simpson (just an example fellas).

Everyone is beautiful. I truly mean that. You may not be beautiful to me, but to someone you are. I'm a firm believer in everyone is beautiful to someone else.

I think you should just work on your self-esteem. Believing your not something will be reflected in the way you act, talk, and carry on with life.

I do respect the fact that you don't want to be used for your body. For 16 that is a very responsible idea. Save yourself, be picky and good things and all the bad you want (heartaches etc.. ) will happen in time.

Good Luck.

Rick

Kitkat22 · Aug 3, 2010, 08:00 PM

Good luck and get some confidence. Have a good year at school.

cdupre70301 · Aug 4, 2010, 01:44 PM

There is nothing wrong with respecting yourself. You will know when the time is right. Never settle less than what you deserve. If you think a guy is cute or interesting take control and ask him out. Nothing wrong with a young girl going up to a guy and asking them to a dance.

lilmzcrrazi · Aug 4, 2010, 02:51 PM

Thank you for everyone's advice it really helped :]

Legosheep · Aug 24, 2010, 08:18 PM

I don't know how to ask questions here but I am 15, this girl will kiss me but I don't think she will go with me if I'm not a good kisser, I really like her but I've never kissed anyone before and she has kissed a good few..?

Legosheep · Aug 24, 2010, 08:19 PM

I know your article and all but I'm a bit dumb... not eant to distract from your own question

Kitkat22 · Aug 24, 2010, 09:57 PM

Just let it happen naturally. Don't rush into a relationship with a guy just because you want a boyfriend or want to be kissed.
You have plenty of time.

Shaydie · Aug 25, 2010, 07:27 AM

Nothing is wrong with you. You are perfect the way you are. Just make a point to look at guys in the eye. This is the cue I used to let them know I was approachable.