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meriangall · Jun 4, 2010, 08:10 AM

My boyfriend got an engagement ring for me, I told him I didn't want to marry, He told me I could have it for a friendship ring, of which I did. He then broke up with me and met someone els and bought her an engagement ring. She got mad at him and gave his ring back, he came to see me and gave me that ring also. Now he wants both rings back and is threatening me with the police. Can he do this?

ballengerb1 · Jun 4, 2010, 08:14 AM

Sure he can but it will be your word againist his if this gets to court. Police will not likely do anything but he could sue you. Now that bwe covered the legal questuion I have one for you. He was likely very upset about the second breakup, you say you are friends, why would you not give back at least the second ring?

excon · Jun 4, 2010, 08:25 AM

Hello m:

In MOST states, the law says that an engagement ring, given in contemplation of marriage, is NOT a gift - even if you were told that it was.

The cops won't do anything, but, in MOST states, if he sues you, you'll lose. You MIGHT win the second one, though. There's only a contingency attached to the first ring.

excon

meriangall · Jun 4, 2010, 08:28 AM

Originally Posted by ballengerb1

Sure he can but it will be your word againist his if this gets to court. Police will not likely do anything but he could sue you. Now that bwe covered the legal questuion I have one for you. He was likely very upset about the second breakup, you say you are friends, why would you not give back at least the second ring?

He just broke up with me in April. I am really hurt because he came over and said he still loved me.

redhed35 · Jun 4, 2010, 08:36 AM

Originally Posted by meriangall

He just broke up with me in April. I am really hurt because he came over and said he still loved me.

You were engaged and broke up in April,he met and got engaged and broke up with someone else, and its only June,id say you got a lucky break.

For me,id hand back the two rings and go with the advice of the other posters.

It will hurt for a while but at least you can move on without him tormenting you for the rings back.

I wish · Jun 4, 2010, 10:19 AM

How can he love you but threaten you with the police if you don't return the ring?

I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like love to me.

Cat1864 · Jun 4, 2010, 12:23 PM

Originally Posted by meriangall

my boyfriend got an engagement ring for me, i told him i didn't want to marry, He told me i could have it for a friendship ring, of which i did. He then broke up with me and met someone els and bought her an engagement ring. she got mad at him and gave his ring back, he came to see me and gave me that ring also. Now he wants both rings back and is threatening me with the police. can he do this?

-How old are both of you?
-When did he give you the ring?
-Were you at any time engaged to be married to him?
-Has he ever referred to you as his fiancé without you correcting him?
-Are there any witnesses to the ring being given as a token of 'friendship' or was everyone under the impression you were engaged to be married?
-How long did the relationship continue after he gave you the ring?
-Why did the relationship end?

This will come down to the Civil laws where you live that govern contracts and gifts.

Morally, I would give him his rings back and tell him to sell them and use the proceeds to find a good counselor. Anyone who breaks a relationship in April and before June has met, proposed to and been dumped by that person, given the ring to the ex he/she dumped in April and now demands the return of two rings needs to find out what snapped in his/her mind to think that was proper or emotionally healthy behavior. I am serious that he needs to determine why he wants to get married so badly that he is hurting himself emotionally and financially.

It doesn't matter what he says his feeling for you are at this moment. What matters is how you feel about him. If you care about him, give him the rings, let him go and allow yourselves to heal. Don't hold on to the rings as an attempt to hold on to him or because you feel like you deserve them for whatever reason. Just because he is behaving badly doesn't mean you have to respond the same way.

Homegirl 50 · Jun 4, 2010, 12:33 PM

Are you wanting to keep the rings to get back at him?
I think you should give them both back. This way you are not hanging on to the past and can move on.

Ash123 · Jun 4, 2010, 12:47 PM

He's a fool.
But give him the rings. Why have those things anyway... bad karma.

Jake2008 · Jun 5, 2010, 12:58 AM

The first ring was given as a promise of the commitment of marriage. You can call it whatever you want, but it was an engagement ring. Because you didn't marry him, you should give back the first ring.

The second ring was also an engagement ring, to another woman, and why he gave it to you is weird. But, it too is an engagement ring and has no sentimental or other value to you, and why would you hesitate to return it.

My advice is give both rings back, and forget about them. And him.

jmjoseph · Jun 5, 2010, 05:26 AM

Why would you want either ring?

You should have given the first one back when YOU decided that you were not going to marry him. It must have looked good on your finger, thus the "friendship" B.S.

And why in heaven's sake would you have accepted the ring that just came off another woman's hand? How could you not compare the two with an angry heart?

Give the guy his rings back. Payment must be due.

Find someone else to accept jewelry from, and even then let it be a bracelet.

Good luck.