[Tandah]

My daughter who is 2.5 was such a smart little girl. Could count and knew her Abc's at the age of 1. Since her little brother has been born,who is now 7months, she has done completely down hill. She has never been a big eater and now she won't eat anything, everyone tells me its normal.. but the thing is she is crying and upset ALL the time, as most toddlers will eat when they are hungry and are happy for the most part. You can see it in her eyes that she is unhappy. We don't get out much as my husband takes the car to work.. so she doesn't get to be with other children her age very often. A new thing she has started is not answering our questions, like, are you hungry, do you want a drink? What colour is the crayon? I know she can answer.. She won't even look us in the eyes anymore. When we talk to her.
We are going to a children's doctor but my family doc says it could be a long time before we can get to see him. Is there suggestions? I will take anything to help my little girl. Thanks!

[thisisit]

I'm sorry your daughter is having problems. Regression of any kind should be taken seriously. You are right to be concerned. While you wait for the specialist appointment, try to be patient with her. Give her as many new experiences as you can. Talk to her while you play with her. Sing to her. See if she would like to help out with the baby, in little ways, like talking to him while you change him, helping hold the bottle if you are bottle feeding, etc. Talk to her during all your routine activties.

Why is it going to take a long time before you can get an appointment?

[martinizing2]

It is obvious that you spent a great deal of time with your first child for her to know the alaphabet and be counting at that age. She has had ALL your attention until the arrival of the new one which has assuredly taken away a lot of time and attention she has had all her life .
She is most likely feeling left out and somewhat deserted. Try to find ways of spending time with her while taking care of the newborn by asking for her "help" with the baby. Most children love helping adults and it gives them the attention they need.
Take as much time as possible to be with her while the baby naps or any chance you can. Take turns with your husband to do one on one special things with her when possible.
It is no easy job , but the rewards of healthy happy children are worth any amount of work. I know I have 5.
This is a simplistic answer I know, but I am sure from what I have seen from this site you will be receiving replies from impressively qualified people. Hope this helps a little.

[Jake2008]

I was in a very similar boat when mine were little. They were 2 years, 3 months apart.

What I did was buy her a little pink plastic shopping cart. Every Thursday when my husband got home with the car, we would go shopping. She had $2.00 to spend.

We would bring the little shopping cart into the local mall, and go anywhere she wanted to go. Sometimes it was the card shop, or the book store. One time it was the grocery store, and we went up and down every single aisle! Lol At the grocery store, she once settled on a box of bandaids, and we stood in line, and she made her purchase.

She looked forward to that all week- something special just for her.

Then she got home and told her dad all about it, including people we never met, things we never did, and stories galore.

We also read a lot to her while her brother was sleeping. It was really good quality time because she could pick up to four books, and it gave her a sense of a long time with just mom, or just dad.

If you have a park nearby, a lot of fresh air will make her hungry too- do a picnic with things you wouldn't normally have at home like little cupcakes or special shaped sandwiches. If there is a library program near where you live, she may enjoy that too, plus the stimulation of reading and learning with others because she is so bright.

I wouldln't prod her with too many questions, and would more likely say 'your lunch is ready', and make grilled cheese with weiners on top in different shapes. It will seem 'new' but it's just a new way of presenting it.

Try to turn things around so that it is good attention she is seeking, and by being a little creative, you can turn just a sandwich into a whole story in itself.

[Alty]

My kids are 4 years apart. When my daughter (the youngest) was born, my son, potty trained, talking, very independent, became a 1 year old right before my eyes. He wanted to wear diapers, to be fed, you name it.

I was at the end of my rope. Of course I still spent lots of time with him, but a newborn is a full time job, and I couldn't spend as much time with him as I did before my daughter was born.

One day she got really sick, so did I. I didn't have the strength to do anything and hubby was at work leaving me with a very sick baby and a very sick me. That day changed everything. I needed help and the only help around was my son. So I asked for help and he rose to the occasion. He brought me water, he helped changed diapers (getting the diaper, giving me a wipe) and he helped feed his little sister her medicine. He was my little man and the responsibility made him realize that being a big kid is much better then being a baby.

Include her with you baby. Let her wipe his bottom during a diaper change, or apply the powder. Get her to give you a diaper, let her help with bath time and feeding time. Make sure she knows how very important she is, because it's up to her to teach him all the things she already knows, like the alphabet and speaking, and going potty etc.

When the baby is down for a nap, make it big kid and mom time. At her age she wants to help, so let her, and make sure she knows how proud you are that she's such a big girl.

That's my advice. I wish you luck. Keep us posted. :)

[johnpillai]

There are 3 yeary between my daughter and my son. I never had a problem like this. Pay tremondus attention on your first child. Spend much time with your child. Play with her. Hug her plenty of time. Feeding a toddler is really a challenge. I hope this article may help you to solve this problem. Introducing new food
Let them help you in cooking
And don't forget to visit your doctor

[DoulaLC]

Wonderful suggestions to try so far... hopefully you will see a turn around, but do make sure you keep the doctor's appointment.

Might be wise to make note of the changes you have observed if you feel they are persistent. Is the lack of eye contact just a once in awhile thing, or constant? She is not answering your questions, but is that also just every now and then... for example when she is involved in doing something, or a matter of routine now? Does she ask for these things when she wants them? Does she interact when others are around?