[tttg]

What is a fair amount to spend on a engagement ring , it seems my girlfriend is looking for something around 8 to 21 thousand , which I feel is a fair bit for a couple just starting. What are your experiences or thoughts?

[Allheart]

Hi there,

Wow, that sure is a lot of money. I would think whatever you can reasonably afford. I really don't think there is a scale that indicates what is the "norm". For the "Donald" that would be pocket change, for most that is a good bit of money.

Whatever your pockets can afford. Remember, it the meaning behind the ring that matters, not the price paid.

Hope that helps :)

[Geoffersonairplane]

Are we talking dollars or sterling??

I am a brit so I speak in £ but I can switch my brain to $ if you like?

[Geoffersonairplane]

Remember, it the meaning behind the ring that matters, not the price paid.

Hope that helps :)

Absolutely Allheart..

I agree.

[Fr_Chuck]

The diamond industry ( of course who have a vested interest) say you are suppose to spend 3 month salary.

Now on the honest side, I bought my wife a larger group of stones, and in real life it is too large to use or wear except for special occasions ( she works in a office and is a musician) Next you have to pay for special insurance on it.

If you are going to pay a lot for one, look into investment diamond quality, they hold their value a lot better.

so if you are bringing in a couple hundred thousand a year, heck why no.
If you are making 30 to 50 K a year you may want to sit down and have an entire talk about budgets, bill paying and the cost of the entire wedding.

If she is happy with elopeing instead of a 10 K wedding, and getting a 10 K ring instead.

But you know being a ministers, most of the best couples I have married, do so on a 200 to 1000 ring and a 2000 or less wedding.
The others are in so much debt when they say I DO that the money troubles start from day one.

[Geoffersonairplane]

Price is not really important as Allheart says.

It is the meaning behind it. Do the best that you can afford based on your income.

I believe they say the norm is 1.5 times your annual gross salary..

Or is it net? Not sure>? Gross or Net?

[Geoffersonairplane]

Hey,

I just realised that you are the same guy from the other thread.

Is she materialistic?

I do think you need to sit down and talk about this problem she has with spending...

Seriously.

[chuff]

My first thought was $8000 to $21,000 is she out of her mind? I suppose it depends if you can afford that but my other question is should she be telling you how much she wants you to spend or just leave it up to you?

[valinors_sorrow]

I accepted a cigar band (LOL it was an expensive cigar) that he later made good on with a beautiful opal ring that I cherish very much so to some material value is not a concern! You might make sure it's a conflict-free diamond, considered the new movie about to hit the theaters?

[BlazingCold]

What's a cigar band?

[s_cianci]

Traditionally it's 1 month's salary.

[tttg]

I'm glad to see that most of you feel that no mater how big or small the ring is . It's the commitment behind the stone she should be more in love with .

[rol]

That's crazy money!! I got one in January and the fact that he actually went to choose it himself and asked me meant more than any money!! I am a very normal down to earth girl anyhow, I guess some girls are impressed by big diamonds...

[s2tp]

Yeah um 8-21 thousand is just a bit much! I am a pretty simple girl and diamonds don't impress me much. What would impress me is a guy being able to find a good looking ring (I am picky about rings being too big, gaudy or yellow gold - Eww)!

I personally wouldn't care if the ring was $200 or so... I will probably lose it like I do everything else... lol.
But seriously if she is so obsessed with a ring that will cost so much, umm are you wealthy or something, cause I would be worried she is in more love with your bank than you..?
If she makes you happy though and you can afford it... it will probably make your married life easier if you put the pretty penny down... She just might hold it against you that you 'dont lover her enough'... yeah I know, Women are vindictive...

[rol]

YEAH AND IF THE RING is going too cost so much , what about the wedding and honeymoon??

And by saying she needs a break to think about things I think she is just pressuring you to get married and buy that ring.

Tell her you will choose the ring yourself!

[talaniman]

This on top of this? https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...-do-47189.html You should think long and hard about this.

[Geoffersonairplane]

This on top of this? https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...-do-47189.html You should think long and hard about this.

Exactly my thoughts tal.

There are more important issues for this couple to address before going down this route.

[rol]

Yes perhaps for this girl marriage is about a perfect ring and wedding... but does she understand what marriage really is??

[Geoffersonairplane]

Yes perhaps for this girl marriage is about a perfect ring and wedding....but does she understand what marriage really is????

My ex was like that, I think she liked the concept of the engagement party and ring. I did not think she was mature enough to understand what it really means..

Why did I not notice that when I was with her..

How blind I was

I thought I should point out that you don't necessarily need to get married to show someone eternal commitment. Just being loyal and committed to them is enough. These days, less people get married and just live together.

I personally do believe in marriage though but I am very woken up to the fact that BOTH need to be ready and it is a HUGE decision and a REAL commitment and devotion to another person.

[NeedKarma]

I believe they say the norm is 1.5 times your annual gross salary..

Whether it's net or gross I think that is truly excessive. I'm pretty sure it's 2x monthly salary not yearly.

having said that I just read your other thread and I would run, not walk, away from that. Personally I find materialistic women a big turn-off.