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9Lives · May 7, 2010, 09:43 AM

It's a card wishing her happy moms day. It is not calling her my mom or anything like that. It is just a simple card.

My ex AND I have been in a on and off relationship for a while and we broke up for good in March. His mom and I are still cool and I wanted to wish her happy mothers day.

I don't talk to my ex or anything and I have not tried to contact him. But I wanted to be nice to his mom. She reminds me a lot of my own mom who is not living anymore.

Is this inappropriate? Im not expecting anything.

zzzzzzz · May 7, 2010, 09:58 AM

In my experience, I would advise you not to do it. I was in a relationship for ten years, and we have been broken up for a year and a half now. I was in contact with my ex's mom, and I realized that the more contact I had, the harder it was for me to start healing. I used to do the cards, gifts, etc to her, my own mother and I are estranged, but I realize now, that I have to let all of it go. I am sure your ex's mom knows how much you loved her if you were close, and believe me she will understand you not sending her a card under the circumstances. And if she did not understand, that should not be your concern. If your ex and you have been on and off again for some time, but broke up in March for good, you have to start moving forward not looking back. Good luck :)

I wish · May 7, 2010, 09:59 AM

We have no idea what type of relationship you have with your ex's mom and we have no idea how she will react. You are in the best position to make that determination.

Just consider the consequences of your actions or inaction. As long as you can face and live your own decision.

9Lives · May 7, 2010, 12:13 PM

Originally Posted by zzzzzzz

In my experience, I would advise you not to do it. I was in a relationship for ten years, and we have been broken up for a year and a half now. I was in contact with my ex's mom, and I realized that the more contact I had, the harder it was for me to start healing. I used to do the cards, gifts, etc to her, my own mother and I are estranged, but I realize now, that I have to let all of it go. I am sure your ex's mom knows how much you loved her if you were close, and believe me she will understand you not sending her a card under the circumstances. And if she did not understand, that should not be your concern. If your ex and you have been on and off again for some time, but broke up in March for good, you have to start moving forward not looking back. Good luck :)

Thank you. I already sent it. It was in my heart. I don't call her and talk to her really. I know that you are right about this holding you back from healing. From here on, I won't be involved one way or another.

zzzzzzz · May 7, 2010, 12:30 PM

Thank you. I already sent it. It was in my heart. I don't call her and talk to her really. I know that you are right about this holding you back from healing. From here on, I won't be involved one way or another.

I wish you luck! I am glad you will try to stick to your N.C. It is the only way to get through it, the pain is tough, but it will get easier :)

Jake2008 · May 8, 2010, 05:42 AM

I think it is a very sweet thing to do, and I'm glad you sent the card.

Not only does it recognize her as a Mother, but it also shows you hold no ill will toward her, and just wanted to to a kind thing for someone you hold in high regard.

As long as you don't show up with a Birthday cake, or Christmas presents, I see this as a very nice gesture toward another woman that you had a fond relationship with.

I wouldn't give it a second thought, and I'll bet she was very happy to receive your card.

Romefalls19 · May 10, 2010, 06:16 AM

My mom and my ex(from over two years ago) still talk, almost on a daily basis. Her grand mother just died so she is flying up from Florida today and she is going to breakfast with my mom. So I definitely think you should have sent the card, it was a classy thing to do.