[Girl-with-Story]

Sonomama: She is not still in touch with the man she cheated with.
Carrottalker: I am not missing any information, I simply have a different opinion than you.

I did not give out facts that were wrong, I simply stated a different opinion.

And here's another one... I find that a lot of the drastic comments in this thread are from people who were cheated on and are taking the poster's situation personally. This makes for very subjective advice. I hope the poster takes this into account when considering the advice given on here.

[Kitkat22]

Sonomama: She is not still in touch with the man she cheated with.
Carrottalker: I am not missing any information, I simply have a different opinion than you.

I did not give out facts that were wrong, I simply stated a different opinion.

And here's another one...I find that a lot of the drastic comments in this thread are from people who were cheated on and are taking the poster's situation personally. This makes for very subjective advice. I hope the poster takes this into account when considering the advice given on here.

Girl WStory... That's what this forum is all about! I know you've heard the expression, "experience is the best teacher", well a lot of people here may have been cheated on or abused and vice-versa. I don't know that. I do know it's better to hear advice from someone who has been in the situation some of these people have been in.

Do you think if someone posted something about raising dogs or breeding dogs I would answer that question? Of course I wouldn't, I know nothing about that. How about someone wanting to know something about how to start a business or how to find someone or what rights they have in this or that, I'm not going to answer that because I'm no business expert or lawyer or investigator. There are the best in the world right here on this line.

They give advice on other post when they feel they have something that helps the op or someone is way out of line in what they post. Do not tell anyone they don't have a right to answer an op because they have been there and are speaking from their experience.. you don't know what you're talking about dear and that is not a put down. Have you ever been
cheated on? Have you ever been abused. Have you ever contracted an std from your husband or boyfriend? Please think about this.. Blessing

[Curlyben]

All, may I call your attention to the guidelines for using the comments feature found here:
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum-...nes-24951.html

Differences of opinion happen, there isn't a hard and fast answer to this issue.

[sofortunate]

I have been through this, exactly the same... 2 night stand and got an std, not a serious one thank the lord. He was extremley repented. I can tell you, you are ruining your marriage. It's been 2 years! If you haven't left her its because you love her and are willing to forgive her. This will never happen if you keep dwelling on the details. You need to forget your past. Things will NEVER be the same before the 2 night stand. (notice I didn't say affair, affairs are when the spouse actually has a long term relationship with the other person). YOu must create a NEW future a NEW and BETTER marriage with her. It took me a while to realise this. I kept saying, I want to be like before I want to be happy like before. Its impossible to be like before, so why not be better. Be a better husband, be spontaneous, be loving. Your being miserable and your making your wife miserable. She will probably get tired one day and actually leave. Maybe even move on to be with someone else. IF that happens it will be too late to change. No one likes to be with a miserable person. This is what was happening to me. He was getting tired of me being happy one moment and sad an angry the next. The time I realized I needed to change NOW was when he said he was thinking about divorcing me since I wasn't happy anymore. Please, find yourself and stop thinking of the past. It's the Past. Move on, be happy, and be grateful. It could've been so much worse.

[zomer7415]

Your not alone . We went through this in 2006 . My wife went to a businness conference and met a guy there she liked and slept with him 2 nights in a row. We had 3 children at the time. Well the long and short of it is we stayed together with Christian marriage counciling. Had 2 more children since. She was my high school sweetheart as well. We have a bitter\sweet relationship. I know she loves me and wants to stay married but she also wants to have flings on the side. We are considering an open marriage. I am having a hard time with this. I know if I divorse her Im hung with supporting her for the next 17 years as our youngest is 1. I do love her , not sure I could let another man hump her . I still have nightmares from 4 years ago. There is no easy anwer. All I know is adultry is an aweful , aweful sin and has BITTER, BITTER consequenses for all involved. Even if you have an open marriage , I don't see any good coming out of this. 1 or 2 nights of FUN can cause a life time of MISSSERY!! Every situation is different. Our sex life is for sure spiced up though.