[the505man]

Back in November, met this woman who is going to school and also works night. We hit it off very well, became more and more infatuated with each other to the point we were telling each other how we were starting to feel with each other. Then in mid January, we did wind up having sex. Then things got a little strange. A few days later she said that things were going to fast and I did talk to her and she calmed down some. We didn't have sex after that. Then about a week and a half later, she started asking me a lot of quesitons about sex and what I like and I was honest and she was honest with me. Saw her a few days later, no sex, but cuddling, then the following Sunday, she would like to be friend for now due to stress of work and school. She said that she really does like me, doesn't want to lose me and regardless of her feelings can't have a relationship right now. Do you think she is having a commitment issue, is it the stress of all that, or trying to be nice and let me go? We still talk a lot, and she does say things about meeting people and such, so guess I'm fairly confused. She did have a 5 year relationship that the guy never wanted to get married then another that viewed her as a baby factory for him. How can I show that I'm not that and I do want to get married and have a family? I haven't been jumping up and down wanting to get her to see me all the time or doing things all the time. Should I keep showing her that I do care for her and be respectful and nice and learn about her as a friend first, or is this short relationship just that, short term?

[rosemcs]

She told you she can't have a relationship right now, so that is where it is. It was a short-term relationship, that's all. It's over. Don't overanalyze "why" she can't be in it. If it confuses you and you want more out of what she can give, just go no contact and be on your way. You will also find plenty of advice from what others have been through (just like you) in the relationship section. You will see that going no contact is most prevalent to clear your mind.

[talaniman]

You can date, and have fun, as its to soon for the serious stuff you want, but you can get to know each other better.

I caution you that always being hopeful for sex, or a commitment, may make things quite awkward, and disappointing though. As long as your having fun getting to know each other, and not get carried away by your own feelings, then that's okay.

The biggest thing is however we always want more, and get too attached, because we never have enough things going to balance our lives out.

We get consumed by the one we are dating. That's why my rule for single guys is,
Talaniman Rule-Date them all, fat short, skinny, or tall. 18-80, blind cripple or crazy.

This rule require you to be honest with yourself, and the ones you date, that its just for fun and good times.

If you can't do that, back off. Just be friends. She isn't comfortable with what you want right now, so don't get so deeply involved you get carried away, and make this messy.

[dynocompe]

Well what was said in the conversation about sex? Why did the sex turn her off? If the sex turned her away, I think we are missing the most valuable information here


K I am not sure how to edit my last post, but I see there is lots of young users in this forum.

[rosemcs]

Dynocompe, there should be a blue edit button in the middle of your previous post.