[mimom]

My 15 yr old niece has been staying with my cousin and my cousin's family for a year. A couple of years ago, my sister and her husband divorced (father abandoned the family to live in another state). Last year, my sister moved to another state with her boyfriend. My niece is in a stable home where she is treated very well and seems quite happy. She does not get along with my sister's boyfriend and really doesn't feel comfortable with the idea of living with them. My sister has not provided a stable permanent home for her children since her husband left, but she does have legal full physical custody of her children. Does my niece have any say in whether she stays with my cousin or must move to another state to live with her mother and her mother's boyfriend?

[ScottGem]

Depending on the state, her preference would be listened to, but the decision is made by a judge.

Your cousin is playing with fire here. She has no legal standing with this girl. She can't authorize medical treatment or act legally for the child unless she has guardianship at least. If the child is going to stay with her, she needs to get this done.

[mimom]

Scott, Thank you for your reply. My cousin realizes that she has no legal standing with my niece. She and her husband would like to have guardianship, but the entire family is afraid to confront my sister, because she has already threatened to send the child to live with her father, something that even she knows is not a good idea. We just want my niece to be taken care of, stable, and happy. By the way, although my sister is receiving some child support from her ex, she does not provide support for my niece. My sister has her younger daughter living with her now (she also lived with my cousin for several months).

[ScottGem]

I'm not sure you understand. As an example, if you niece is in an accident, she may not be able to get treatment until the mother or father signs off.

This is a dangerous situation and NEEDS to be resolved. Your niece CANNOT be taken care of and given stability without your cousin getting guardianship.

[mimom]

Ahhh... I think I understand. Your concern is that she would not be able to receive even EMERGENCY medical treatment?

[ScottGem]

Ahhh...I think I understand. Your concern is that she would not be able to receive even EMERGENCY medical treatment?

Right, as a minor, she needs her legal guardian to approve medical treatment.

Also, who registered in school? Things like that.

[mimom]

My cousin registered her in school with her mother's permission. The child is doing better in school right now than she ever has before.

[ScottGem]

When she was registered did the mother give permission for your cousin to act for her in school matters? Was this permission in writing?