[LittleLotus]

Hey, I was wondering... how do you act hard to get?

I hate the way I act around this one guy that I'm dating right now. I feel like I have all the time in the world to answer his calls right away and that I show that I'm too available or eager to talk to him. I know for a fact that I do not want to display that but I act it anyway. I don't want to lie but I don't want to be weigh too cliny and act needy around him. That's what I don't want to display because most guys don't like girlfriends who are overly clingy.

Is there any way for me to act hard-to-get so that I can get rid of this display of actions that seems to follow me every where but not lie?

[Krs]

Well how long have u been datin this guy!

[Bluerose]

Playing hard to get is just that playing. If you want this guy to take you seriously, don't play games. Be upright and honest. If it works out great, if it doesn't he wasn't for you. If you are being open and honest and he doesn't see that then it's his loss. No games.

[talaniman]

There is no reason ever to play a game with anyone. Be yourself and be honest about how you feel. If his feelings for you are real he will stick around. If not... lotta fish in the sea.

[valinors_sorrow]

It doesn't work to "play" at being hard to get, however it does work to BE hard to get, honestly and genuinely. When you have a life that is fulfilling, interest from the opposite sex doesn't make so much impact and there is a natural busy-ness that is occurs to help keep their presence in perspective. The other person is just in your life, instead of being your whole life. Neediness comes from having no life, from being incomplete as a person-- not from attracting the ultimate mate. Its with you always but oddly only shows up when you get in a relationship. In its ultimate form its called codependency and ruins a lot of lives. It's a kind of desperation for love. It takes healing and growing to correct, often with the help of a professional. It was there I discovered how incomplete I was -- not my fault since I come from very dysfunctional people, but my responsibility to correct once I was aware of it. Until I did, all my previous relationships were destined to fail, I see that eventually looking back. I was not adult enough even though I was of age. Growing up was worth it too, since everything (especially relationships) got easier for me.