[cherri_blossom66]

I really don't know how to explain this but I'm going to try...
I'm not happy.
Ever since I lost a close friend to suicide... its all been down hill... I nearly lost another 3 of my good friends as well to the same thing... now I feel like I want to do it.
I hate being me... this all sounds stupid and ill probably get comments about me being a sook and to just get over it... don't they think I have tried?
I feel alone all the time... I won't tell my friends about it... I can't talk to the school counselor... I want to die... there are other reasons I just don't know how to put them into words... sometimes I find myself saying why don't you just do you... no one will care
I don't want to be here anymore... its all too hard... and some of it isn't worth the pain... all the going on in my life like friend problems the suicide and attempted suicides... I hate me...
I want to do it but I'm too scared... I need help

[aromero565]

Your scared because you don't really want to do that. Life is hard there's not a day that goes by that I don't think about "what if I wasnt here to deal with life" but you have to make things better. Your not your friends and instead of thinking about suicide you should think about what you need to do to be happy. Remember just because things are hard now doesn't mean that they will stay that way.

[Krs]

Have you considered seeking professional help? Such as a physcologist? Sometimes talking to a complete stranger helps.

Life is full of surprises and trust me when I say I've had my fair share, but you need to be strong and come pass them. Don't let anything pull so down that you can pull yourself back up.

Life is too short, make the most of it.
Be happy and smile :)

[ordinaryguy]

How long has it been since your friend died? How about the three that tried but failed? Do all these people know each other? Is there major drug/alcohol abuse in this circle of friends? If this is a big whirlpool of collective despair, you may need to take yourself out of it. Or if any of you have the strength to help each other through it, by all means do it. Hopelessness tends to feed on itself and you need to find a way to break free from the pattern. Posting here is a good first step, but you probably need some one-on-one face-to-face help as well. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. If there's anybody in the world that cares for you, please don't put them through what you've just gone through. If you think nobody in the world does care, I'll bet you're wrong about that. How old are you?

[Amythest]

I hate to say this, but your friend who killed themselves, probably thought no one would care... and guess what ? You care and it is ripping you apart. YOu would be so surprised at how mny people are affected by your life that you may not even know about... There could be someone with a secret crush on you, a friend a relative, a class mate. It could be a neighboor. I had a friend who killed themselves years ago, and I thought I would never make it out of there. Life was crappy in High school for while and I delt with dperession everyday, but one day I woke up and realized how many people would be affected. I know its hard I do I have been there I thought man Imust be the angel of death because everyone I am close to dies... YOu feel alone, like no one cares, but it's a lie in our heads that we believe... it isn't true I promise, people out there they care about you. Please talk to someone and get help, suicide is like cheating yourself and those around you.

[cherri_blossom66]

I'm 14 and my friend killed himself in late February... he was also 14... I have thought about the conciquences and I don't want to hurt my family... there is no drug or alcohol abuse we are all just unhappy and now... I fear we are all drifting apart... the last parts of danny I know are leaving me and drifting away and that's hurting me.

[Krs]

Do you want to leave the same kind of pain your friend left behind? With friends and family?
You are talking to us here, so you're crying for help.
Ive had suicide in my family, my cousin killed himself 3 years ago. He was a very depressed guy, I miss him dearly.

You are only 14 look at the full life you have ahead of you. Life isn't an easy road there are plenty of other bumps you will encounter but you have to be strong, you have to learn to go by as life does go on.

When my father was told he had terminal cancer and would die within the next few months I thought my life ended there and there I saw no future ahead of me, not even with my husband, but unfortunately life goes on.
When I had my moody days I say "daddy doesnt want to see me sad" "daddy wants to see me happy", so say that to yourself because I'm 100% sure your parted friend doesn't want to see you sad either :)

[Rychebeast]

I've been there too... you are NOT alone... you never will be... why? You yourself have said it... you HAVE friends. You HAVE family. Honestly, what I have learned over the years is this: when we want to "hurt" ourselves; when we want to end it; when we say no one will care; we are being selfish. That my friend, is a simple truth.. I know you're hurting.. I am too in my own ways.. but, God never gives us anything we cannot handle.. you must find the reason for the things that are occurring in your life.. remember that You are not the only one that this happens to. There are millions who feel what you or I feel at times. Things happen in our life to direct us down a path that we would not have found on our own had these things not happened. Does that make sense? I hope that you will not hurt yourself and deprive this world of your love. YOU are a force that can help another in life... you may yet still have to meet the person whose life you will change for the better... be STRONG my FRIEND...

[traceygirl]

Hi, Don't Be Stupid, People Love You Out There, Think Of Your Family,and Friends, Who Will Miss You, And I Will Miss You, So Don't Even Go There There Is More To Life, Im Here If You Ever Want To Talk, Take Care Xx

[jokertown]

I feel your pain, I'm kind of going through the same thing. Sometimes I find that talking helps me. Even like walking or exercising can get some of the feelings out, also its OK to cry, I know I don't like to cry but when I do it helps me kind of get all that build up inside of me out. I have had a pretty messed up life and at times I feel like just ending everything but then I just think to myself "Life can only get better from here." It may take awhile for things to get a bit smoothed out and better to deal with but if you just hang in there then they will get better. I hope I helped you out some. :D Enjoy life, its hard at times to do so but if you just think to yourself "Im gonna make today a good day" then maybe you can get by. :D BE HAPPY lol

[Amythest]

I raly hope you stick this out. PLease don't end your life. High school is sucky, but it does get better once your out. I don't know what crowd you fall into. But I got teased a lot in high school, even ahad some loser chick tell me to just kill myself already. But it does get better.

[cherri_blossom66]

Thank you all so much... some of that made me cry a little... I have decided to talk to the school counselor and no matter how down again I am never going to put my family and friends through what Danny put all of us through... I love and miss him so much and think about him every night... if people are going to be thinking about me before they sleep I want them to be happy about it... not crying cause I'm not here... if that makes sense
Once again thank you all so much

[Krs]

Good for you, you see you already making some good progress and besides you are thinking clearly :) best of luck dear x

[relroy]

Simple solution
1>take a long vacation(it will change your life)i would recommend any asian country.
2>read lots of books(avoid tragedies)
3>start a hobby.I personally find physical activities exhilarating.try going to the gym,trekking,swimming,jogging etc
4>go shopping!(my fav)
5>MUSIC