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The loss of my twin boys
I was pregnet in June when I had found out with twins, I was so scared but me and my boy friend started loving the idea of 2 babies, then we lost ryder, no reason nobody kows why it just happen. It was horrific for the both of us but we managed to pull ourselves together, so I just went to my boyfrined, everything was fine went home Washington state]
Two weeks later woke up to awful pain and a blood bath, ran to the hospital and lost sam, at 4 1/2 mo... I want to die. We had spent all the time planning and growing more in loove, then this crushed us. He won't speak talk, write. I don't know what to do,, I am so scared for me and him. Iam back to using drugs I can't get rid of the pain... I need a break from the pain... does anyone have any positive advise? Thank you: |
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I am so sorry for your loss... after my daughter died I found talking to other parents really helped,and the support and friends I made reallly made a difference to my life and mental state at that time.
I also suggest councilling for both of you,apart and together... |
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I am so sorry, you must be uttterly devastated and it's made so much worse by the fact that you can't speak with your BF.
Please stop taking drugs and start talking to someone professional - is there a social worker or counsellor at the hospital you can talk to? They could also give you a referral to the types of support groups that Red has recommended. Your BF probably hears your pain and simply doesn't know what to do - he will be finding it difficult to respond to his own emotions, let alone yours. Can you go and see him? Perhaps you can speak to someone he knows and get a message though to him. You need to get together and comfort each other, quickly if possible. If you can't get together then rely on the support of your family and friends - talk, cry, scream. Don't feel bad about expressing your emotions, you need to. Drugs will only dull your pain temporarily, please talk to someone about your grief. |
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Thank you for all your support, I feel so numb like it all just a bad dream... I jusst want to feel life again. It hurts so bad I think of them constantly and always wonder if it was something I did. God that will never leave my th oughts. Just so damn painful |
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