[F0rdMan1966]

Start by saying this is a really screwed up situation, I use to have a friend. I stopped talking to him about 2 years ago, well a month ago I found out his girlfriend I have known for a long time really likes me, and I really liked her, we talked just as friends and got super super close, because we both were having the same relationship problems. Well it came down to were we both were single because our previous relationships did not work. So we hung out and had an awsome time! Hit it off great, she text me saying how happy I make her and all that. It was great, we texted alll the time. We hung out the next day and the same thing, she was happy, she had such a big smile her face. It was an amazing time with her. Well the past month I grew so close to each other and we were so happy, and the past week she is acting different. She told me the other day good things come in time, which I don't blame her, we don't need to date right now after getting out of relationships. But she use to text me alll the time. Yestorday she texted me a few times, then she just stopped. Today I texted her saying hi and she said hi back, and that is it. She isn't the same anymore. It hurts because the past month we got so close, I try to make her happy, I DO make her happy, she always smiled and giggled so much. Now its like I don't know, it hurts. I miss her and I don't know if she is scared or what? Her ex boyfriend told her he wants nothing to do with her, he broke up with her. I think she may still want to be with him, because he broke up with her after 2 years, which I understand, but he treated her like a worthless piece of the whole time, and sense we talked she said she wished she could have me and be treated so great. Please give me any advice, maybe I just need to back off, but I have some sense we started. Thanks for any advice. Hope the best for all of you.

[redhed35]

I believe you hit the nail on the head when you said to back off for a while..

She is probably still hurt from her last breakup and not yet ready for a new relationship... if you think you can be friends without expectations,that may work.

Don't put any pressure on her,give her lots of space.

Her response to your texts does not mean she does not like you,only perhaps she needs time to heal.

[F0rdMan1966]

Thank you, I think your right, because the other night she said she likes me just as much as she has ever have, I know she is still hurt from that two year relationship, she even told me she isn't ready to jump back into one asap, I get very fustrated with this for the past week, I told her I am not putting any pressure on her, nor have I ever raised my voice or been mean about it. I told her I am going to be there for her, I have just been nice and caring to her needs and just want her to be happy.

[superk]

Dating a person who just got out of painful situation won't give you benefit anyway: either you will just be used or be a baggage keeper. At first, you thought you are helping by being there, it feels good but you will end up hurting yourself more. These things has be dealt by herself, alone. If you want to help, give her space... lots of space.

Give it a time. She already knows you like her. If she wants to be with someone, have some fun, she knows who to text.

[F0rdMan1966]

Yeah, thanks superk. That does make sense, when going threw this. There is too much floating around in my head. Glad for this site. It's a hard situation because my ex girlfriend is still talking to me. And I told her we can hang as friends on sat. just as friends. The girl that all this is happening too said that's a good idea because the same with her ex boyfriend, and she said she hopes we get together one day because she knows how happy we would be together, and that what's meant to be will happen and good things come in time.. I guess, keep my head up and hope for the best.

[talaniman]

I think if you both stop hanging with the exes so much and heal properly, then you could both be doing great things together later. Its hard to fully heal with the exes so close, for either of you.

[Homegirl 50]

She needs time and if you really care about her give it to her.
If she is still seeing her ex you need to leave her alone until she knows what she wants.
Backing off "some" is not backing off.