[free_money]

I spent the majority of my childhood getting picked on and having no friends. This was because I was overweight and didn't take care of myself. By the time I was in 5th grade, I was an emotional eater. I would spent all- if not most- of my time snacking in front of the t.v. I was incredibly shy and had no social skills, as you can obviously imagine. I became really depressed. I've had summers where I would just spend days at a time crying in bed. And I still have days like that.

I've grown less shy over the years, but I'm nowhere near as confident as I want to be. I'm in college now and I try to take really good care of myself (in terms of hygiene and good health) and I've gotten a lot of compliments.

But the thing is, I can look at myself in the mirror and be happy with what I see and like the way I look, but when I step outside in public I can't help but feel like I'm not good enough. I'm still scared to start up a conversation with someone and still scared to speak up in class. I'm always comparing myself to other people. I'm just as afraid of what people think of me as I used to be.

There's one main thing that I just really don't understand. I was shy because I didn't apply myself and people thought I was ugly. But now I apply myself and I think I look good, but I'm still shy.

Why can't I overcome this?

[jaime90]

I'm really shy too- and self-concious. Even today before I got online (I'm at work on my break) a new kid was talking to me, it was uncomfortable to talk back to him- I don't know why! I always envy people who can get up and dance around and go to parties and be outgoing- because that's just not me, but I wish it was. The biggest thing for me that pushes me to talk to people is not caring what they think about me- which is hard because I've got low self-esteem. Yeah, it's way uncomfortable, but you just got to chit-chat and not even care what the other person thinks- that's what I do at least to TRY to overcome my shyness.

[Clough]

Hi, free_money!

If you would like to do so, I have some activities that I like to do with people on this site that can help them to feel better about themselves.

If you'd like to know what they are and maybe participate in doing them, please let me know on this thread.

I've been shy all of my life. It's something that we just need to practice to overcome, even though it might still be there...

Thanks!

[jenniepepsi]

Hi hon. I have to speak up on this with you.

Why do you want to change yourself?
There is nothing wrong with being a shy person. I have been shy all my life and yes, it can cause problems, but there isn't anything wrong with being shy, just like there isn't anything wrong with being out going. You are who you are, be proud of who you are.

If you are wanting to change that, I support you hon. Don't think I don't. *hugs* a technique I have used to get past my shyness and fear of others judging me, is to go onto a website for socilizing, and post your picture and ask for opinions. Putting yourself out there takes guts, and if you can do it, it can make you feel empowered.

Also, get out there into the world. Even if you don't do anything, just go.

[sassyd1]

Ithink I'm suffering with depression. How do I know

[Clough]

Ithink i'm suffering with depression. How do i know

Hi, sassyd1!

If you have a separate question, please start a new thread. This is the thread of someone else.

This place doesn't work the same way that a chat room does. If you want your question to be recognized as being your own, then you need to start a new thread.

Thanks!

[sGt HarDKorE]

Obviously being made fun of has hurt yourself esteem and hence could have made you much more shy. However, the way to overcome it is first knowing you are shy, and then dealing with it. When a new person comes into work, school, etc, Be the first to say hi. And the way I deal with situations when I want to overcome shyness by putting myself in their shoes. Would I think it's awkward if someone came up to me and helped me out? No, I would be grateful.

Understanding how I would make a person feel with my actions has allowed me to overcome shyness quite easily. Nothing bad will happen if you speak up!