[texasgirls]

My Mother in law just moved in with us about 2 weeks ago. She just found out she has ovarian cancer so she went through surgery and soon has to go through Chemo. We moved her and her two 12 year old kids in our house since she cannot work to pay her rent.

We have come to find out she doesn't pay most of her bills and she doesn't know that we know. She is very secreative and has always been. She lies straight to our face about everything including telling us her car is paid off but still owes $23k on it.

Friends have told us that we could be responsible for her debt if she is living for us. Is that true? This will bankrupt us and it is scraying me to death.

Please help.

[Fr_Chuck]

In the US, not unless you agree to pay her debt, if a debt collector calls and you tell them you will pay it, then yes you could.

Two issues, first since you are helping her out, you have some right to know what or where her finances are.
If she is not working at all, who is going to pay the car bill, or the doctor bills or other bills.

Even the bills for the two 12 year old school lunches and more.

It is time to set her down and read her some facts of lifes, tell her that if she wishes to lie to you, then she may have to move out. Also how long ( forever most likely) do you plan on her staying

[texasgirls]

I truly agree about sitting her down. My husband doesn't want to treat her like a little kids but I keep telling him if she is in our house than she needs to tell us the truth about everything. She has told us some but lies about everything else. She gets child support but not until next month and she tells us we will get most of that to cover the expenses of them living here which will help but once Chemo starts it won't cover much.

She lied to us about having health insurance and doesn't. Well she applied for it and happened to get insurance approved just in time but has no policy or snything for us to look at to see if it will cover Chemo, We just sold out boat in case we have to cover Chemo and her other daughter is doing the same. It is depressing since my husband and I work so hard for what we got and it feels like it is being taken away so quickly.

Now that people keep telling us that since she is living in our house we could be responsible for her car, old bills etc it scares me! We will go broke. My kids should not have to suffer from her being stupid with her money.

We found out on the internet that if we don't sign a power of attorney we shouldn't be liable but I want to make sure. Oh believe me I won't sign anything that we are going to cover her bills for her.

Chemo is 6 times and 3 weeks in between so I am guessing she will be with us for a long time. It is going to be hard on me since there is now 7 people living in our house and they help with nothing. I feel like a hotel, maid and a cook.

[ScottGem]

First, having her live with you does not, in any way make you liable for her debts. Unless you agree to take responsibility for any debt, you cannot be held responsible in any way.

If any creditors contact you about her debts, you tell them you are not responsible. Even if she told them you were, unless you sign anything agreeing to take on the debt, you can't be held responsible. Even if you agreed to take on a POA you still wouldn't be responsible for her debts.

[excon]

Friends have told us that we could be responsible for her debt if she is living for us. Is that true? This will bankrupt us and it is scraying me to death.

Hello texas:

NOT true.

excon

[texasgirls]

That is so good to hear. Thank you both for helping me out.

[excon]

Hello again,

I should have read your second response...

If you understood a few distinctions, you'll see that this isn't as bad as it appears. In terms of her creditors, she appears to be, bankrupt. She CAN, at some point or other make it an actual LEGAL declaration, but in terms of paying her bills - she CAN'T.

So, I don't know what you're trying to get her to do, when you sit her down... But, maybe if you approached her with a PLAN, you guys could work things out... If her ONLY income is child support, that can't be garnished, so she's judgment proof. As ugly as that sounds, it can work in her/your favor...

First off, the creditors can't get blood from a turnip. You DO need to STOP the creditor harassment. Within the Fair Debt Collection Practices Act, you have a method of STOPPING the creditors to calling, writing, or bothering her in ANY way. All it takes is a cease and desist letter. They can, and WILL sue her if she owes a bunch... So, prior to THOSE court appearances, she files for legal bankruptcy...

Until then, let her concentrate on getting well, and you can concentrate on your family, and not have to worry.

excon