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Synnen · Aug 22, 2009, 10:23 PM

And please--no chat speak. This is an adult board, and we hold it to adult standards.

And you're right--you DO need more than a big penis to get off.

But the only way to figure out WHAT, exactly, you need is to do some research, know your own body, and have open lines of communication in the bedroom.

If you can't TALK about sex with someone, you shouldn't be having sex with them.

Saiyuri · Aug 22, 2009, 10:35 PM

What do u mean by chat speak? O.o

Well if there was a good spot he was working I'd tell him. But right when I say something it changes and he stops to breath or the positioning moves or just... something.

Well me and my ex when we were still together we would pretty try to talk about what was wrong with me. But everything just made him really depressed that he couldn't fulfill me in that way. And I was usually mad and disappointed too. I can't tell u how many times I told him to just forget about it and I'd just get up in the middle of it and walk out...

Synnen · Aug 22, 2009, 10:42 PM

Well, there's part of your problem--you're not communicating.

Here's the thing: you shouldn't have to be afraid or worried about ruining the moment for talking about what you like. And YOU are in charge of your orgasm. The sooner HE realizes that, the better off things will be. Somehow, men tied being able to please a partner with their OWN sexuality---and in a way it's true, but seriously--he needs to RELAX about it. This isn't a porn film, and it takes as long as it takes.

As far as the chat speak---the word is YOU, not u. And YOUR, not your.

Type out the full word, please.

Saiyuri · Aug 22, 2009, 11:08 PM

Well me and that guy are not together anymore. And I was single for about a year. But I'm in a long distance relationship now with someone. But we've only been together 2 months so we're not worried about the sex.

It may tie in with how attracted to the person I am. But then again I still am not sure. I've had Lots of issues with my lower body anyway. Like, no period for over a year and such and had to take some medication to get it going. But my mom would always yell at me because of the doctor bill, so I never went back which is very unfortunate for me and my health...

Synnen · Aug 22, 2009, 11:19 PM

You need to see your doctor, then.

Medications can SERIOUSLY affect your libido.

And yes--how attracted you are to someone makes a difference too.

Saiyuri · Aug 22, 2009, 11:32 PM

Well I guess I'll have to wait until I have a good job and insurance and whatnot.
I'm kind of scared to get a job and go to school because I don't want to struggle and get too far behind.

Synnen · Aug 22, 2009, 11:34 PM

Have you checked with your school to see if they have a clinic they can refer you too? Sometimes schools have one that is affiliated with them, and the cost is on a sliding scale.

Saiyuri · Aug 23, 2009, 12:12 AM

I don't know... It's an Art school... Not like a regular university... Don't know if that matters. But I can ask. :)

fisk · Aug 23, 2009, 10:01 AM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Females ALWAYS take longer than guys -- a LOT longer!

Please go to your local library or look at some well-written web sites to learn about female sexuality.

Kind of off topin, but have you got any adresses of 'well-written sites'?

Xrayman · Aug 27, 2009, 03:53 PM

Wikipedia is the first place I'd be looking, but then again I contribute to it a lot. ;)

Xrayman · Aug 27, 2009, 04:01 PM

I have been following your posts and I can see what others have said about your lack of communication with previous and present partners. I would like to add that you seem very "goal oriented" on achieving orgasm-that makes great sense-nothing wrong with that, however you seem too fixed on orgasm to really enjoy it, and your partners don't seem to be able to enjoy sex with you because of this.
Sometimes YOU enjoy sex when your inhibitions and your partners inhibitions (JOB to make you climax) are not there. In other words relax, spend some time masturbating before you have sex-or do it while you have sex-teach him to do it for you EVENTUALLY when you have sex-then things may come a little more natural to you both.

Note: we ALL like to help FOR FREE on this site-it is called good manners to accept what everyone is trying to do for YOU, and listen to their opinions/good advice take from it what you want and leave the rest, but don't fire-up over a detail that annoys you. Take it with a pinch of salt.

Cheers

smoothy · Aug 28, 2009, 05:52 AM

You can't see tight or loose in a photo.

Some women are tighter than others... NOT being exceptionally tight has plenty of advantages... those who ARE exceptionally tight have to deal with encounters that last minutes at most, and many times they don't even get primed before its over.

I've dated many women before I married... and its not if you are tight or not that matters most... its what's between your ears that does.

The tightest woman I ever slept with had 4 kids... and the loosest had none.

I married none of them because of what was between their ears, not because of what was between their legs.

I married the woman who got my attention intellectually. And happy I did.

NataliaVM · Oct 23, 2009, 02:20 PM

I totally agree with Synnen on this one. I think it would be rare for any woman to reach orgasm in 2 to 5 minutes with ANYONE unless she was getting direct clitoral stimulation.
In a situation like the one where your boyfriend went for hours you could stop and use a vibrator together to help you reach orgasm. Sex toysAdult Sex Toys - 25%-50% OFF like vibrating cock rings or strap on vibes that can be worn during sex can also be helpful.

Jamilaa · Oct 23, 2009, 04:54 PM

If you lubricate and foreplay well,it won't be a problem.