[falepuipui]

I have no job,no money, no girlfriend, my family thinks I'm a total loser because I'm always borrowing from them.

[falepuipui]

:(:(I have no job,no money, no girlfriend, my family thinks I'm a total loser because I'm always borrowing from them.:confused::mad::(

[inertia]

Start small because progress is incremental. Don't worry about girls right now, way too big of a distraction for you.

[justcurious55]

inertia's right. But maybe we can get a little bit more specific on just where to start small. I'd start with a job. And make that your first priority. Worry about a girlfriend last.

There's one member of my family that is always borrowing money. He often gets jobs and then either quits or gets himself fired within a few weeks. Always expecting the rest of the family to help fix his mistakes and blaming us when we won't and he has to be responsible. It's frustrating dealing with him sometimes. But at the end of the day we still love him. Maybe instead of asking your family for money, you can ask them for different help. Help you create a resume. Help you find places to apply for a job at. Things like that to help get you going.

[sambolad]

First of you are not a loser!! Everyone has a stage in their life where they need to rely on their family to help them out a bit, and if they think anything of you which I'm sure they do then they won't mind. Seondly if you have no job because you won't look for one then I have no sympathy for you but if you genuinely cannot get a full time job just keep your chin up and keep trying mate, I couldn't get a job for 2 years because I was too shy to get an interview, yes my own fault I know but my family supported me and helped me to overcome it, my advice to you is look on the bright side as there is always something good waiting around the corner for you, if that fails then there's always someone else who is worse of than you. Chin up soldier.

[amicon]

Start by trying to get the best job you can find.are you in a big city?don't give up-you ll find something and tell your family that they upset you.

[Romefalls19]

Get a job first, and worry about the girlfriend thing later. Apply EVERYWHERE

[snow124]

Like everyone said, don't give up on a job search. Don't afraid to be underemployed - working at McDonald's is worlds better than being unemployed. A steady income will provide self-sufficiency and a stability to get other matters in life straight.

[I wish]

Like snow124 said, any job is better than no job.

Stabilize your personal life first before worrying about sharing your life with someone else. In other words, keep trying to apply for jobs and have a steady income before you worry about getting a girlfriend.

Let your family say whatever they want. These are tough economic times, so you'll just have to work that much harder to get a job. Just don't give up and keep moving forward.

[dontknownuthin]

I think it may be helpful to make a list of specific things that you would like to change about your life and then put them in priority order. Several things you mentioned are really the same problem - not having a job. So, start there.

For help getting a job there are all sorts of free resources around - call your local unemployment office (they can help you even if you aren't eligible for unemployment payments - they can direct you to resources for finding a job). Ask for help from people you know who are doing well.

Sometimes people who have a lot of things in life that aren't going well may be in a depression, and consider whether that might be the case for you. See a doctor if you feel bad about yourself a lot of the time - sometimes you need medication to get over the rough spot and get back on the right track in your thinking, so that you are physically and emotionally able to focus on doing what you must to change your circumstances. Best wishes and don't loose faith - you can make positive change.

You need to step out of feelings of shame and just adopt an attitude of, "well, I'm doing the right thing now so I'll focus on that".

[hibbs1022]

Yea def don't worry about a relationship. Start applying for jobs like crazy, even if the jobs not amazing you can always keep applying while working a not so great job just get out there and start making cash! There's an order to do this: first job, then you'll have money, pay for what you NEED first, then when you have a solid base in the bank start worrying about girls.

[Clough]

Hi, falepuipui!

In addition to the excellent advice that you've already been given, I would suggest thinking positively and proactively and taking action on what you know that you need to be doing.

A big part about life is making choices. You can "turn you scars into stars". But, a big part in doing that is making the correct choices for the actions that you'll take. Just taking action can be a huge hurdle to get over...

Are you still living with your parents? What sort of education, skills and job experience and/or training do you already have, please?

Thanks!

[Clough]

Hi, falepuipui!

I'm going to ask that your two threads concerning this be combined. You've already received a number of responses on each thread and it's less likely to be confusing if the same questions and answers are on the same thread.

I also agree with I wish, that this sort of question would be much more appropriate if placed in the Personal Growth forum topic area.

Thanks!

[Clough]

Originally posted by I wish:

I like this quote: "You can turn your scars into stars."

Hey thanks, I wish! That's something that I learned a long time ago from a friend, and it's stuck with me ever since then.