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    backkyy's Avatar
    backkyy Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Aug 6, 2009, 01:53 PM
    I got 99 problems and love is one of them
    All right, I'll get down and dirty!

    I got problems. I have a wonderful boyfriend whom I've been dating for 7 years now. But I am still thinking of my first love. Which is usually common. I was close to leaving my boyfriend but figured, nah, why waste the good life for something that I was unsure of. I do not live life on the edge with love. Ha! But I need some straight advice knocked in my head.

    Got any?
    none12345's Avatar
    none12345 Posts: 1,439, Reputation: 234
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Aug 6, 2009, 01:56 PM

    There is a reason why you and your first love broke up. Simply just wasn't meant to be. If it is, you ll find your way back to each other some day.

    Heck I still have feelings for my first love and the truth is we ll probably never stop having those feelings. You got to look at what you have now because most of the time people don't know what they've got till its gone. I hope it helps a little. =P

    Don't relive the past but look towards the future I always say/
    Starry nights's Avatar
    Starry nights Posts: 213, Reputation: 104
    Full Member
     
    #3

    Aug 6, 2009, 11:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by backkyy View Post
    Alright, I'll get down and dirty!

    I got problems. I have a wonderful boyfriend whom i've been dating for 7 years now. But I am still thinking of my first love. Which is usually common. I was close to leaving my boyfriend but figured, nah, why waste the good life for something that I was unsure of. I do not live life on the edge with love. Ha! But I need some straight advice knocked in my head.

    Got any?
    Don't throw away something beautiful by being careless.Cos you don't want to end up 7 yrs later,feeling exactly the same way about this boyfriend,while being with someone else.

    Its strange that when we have what we want,we still want more and better.And once we move on to newer pastures,we feel we never actually wanted that.But by that time,its too late.
    makapuu's Avatar
    makapuu Posts: 304, Reputation: 63
    Full Member
     
    #4

    Aug 6, 2009, 11:53 PM

    I've heard many times that love is over-rated. So if you are happy living the good life without taking a risk with love, then you made the right choice. If you are not happy in your "good life" then you might want to re-evaluate when the time comes.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #5

    Aug 7, 2009, 05:50 AM

    7 years is a long time. Maybe things are getting too comfortable and routine that you want to spice things up?

    It doesn't sound like there are any problems with your boyfriend, only that the relationship is getting boring. Why don't you try doing/experiencing new things together to shake things up a bit? Why ruin a good thing? You might regret it even more by leaving him to go searching for something that might not even be out there.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #6

    Aug 8, 2009, 02:14 PM

    Enjoy your fantasies, but don't let them affect your reality.
    0rphan's Avatar
    0rphan Posts: 1,282, Reputation: 240
    Ultra Member
     
    #7

    Aug 8, 2009, 02:41 PM

    I agree with everyone here, I think you just got what we call... the 7 year itch... keep scratching at it and it will cause you trouble.

    You sound like your whole relationship with your b/f has got a bit boring, it's not your b/f but perhaps you need more in your life.

    Maybe a change of job or perhaps a holiday, you need to fulfil this void. Join a club meet new people,take up a hobbie or train to do something you've always wanted to do, I feel you need a challenge in your life.Maybe you and your b/f could do or learn something together.

    You don't mention children, perhaps you could travell, or even move house, new surroundings etc.

    I think you should speak to your b/f, talk about what you would like in the future, find out what his hopes and dreams our for you both... are they the same!
    LifeChangesMan's Avatar
    LifeChangesMan Posts: 329, Reputation: 39
    Full Member
     
    #8

    Aug 8, 2009, 02:47 PM
    Let me take a crack at this,

    The beautiful thing about responding to this post, is I feel I can write anything I would like and still be right. :p

    Seven years, eh? Say you live until your 77, that's 1 / 11 of your life... that still leaves how much more if you want to walk away? Some may look at it and say you got a lot to live, and others will say your done living, that's up to you. I just like making people see all of their options.

    My BEST advice, would be you have a great thing going for you, no need to ruin it, I don't know too much about your first love and how long it was and such but regardless the feelings for your first love will NEVER go away, in my opinion, and from my experiences those who left there first loves for no reason or to play the field or thought the grass was greener, has come back to bit them in the butt eventually, whether being alone, getting hurt, or just plain miserable.

    I'm saying your happy now, it's okay to dream, so dream. It's okay to say what-if, and think of the what-if. Just don't lose focus of the reality here in life. You don't need anyone on here to tell you what you should do.

    Take Care,

    LCM.

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