[feirce pinky]

Hi I am 11 and I just want to ask my mom if when could I get a bra but she always says no. I need help to show my mom that I need a bra. How dob I tel her?

[danielnoahsmommy]

Do you really need one? Tell your mom you think you do. She is hesitant most likely she is afraid to see her baby grow up!

[Fr_Chuck]

Ask her to go with you and talk to a professional fitter who can decide.

[superk]

I had my first bra when I was 10.

She's been there and she knows around this time you will need it. Maybe come with her on shopping, take her to the bra section, pick what you like then tell her you need it. If your breast is not yet that big, then you may start with a baby bra (the one that's looks like sports bra).

Moms is the easiest person to talk to when it comes to this matter so relax.

[Gemini54]

I agree with Fr Chuck, ask her to take you to a good department store and get the advice of a professional fitter.

There is no point wearing a bra if you're not ready for one yet - but if you do need one then it should be professionally fitted so that it helps your breast grow properly without being constricted.

[handyamby]

I have to comment on this as this happened to me when I was your age. My mother and older sister and now all my younger sisters are all well endowed and I am average size in the boob area. When I was 11 I told my mom I needed a bra and she laughed in my face and made flat chested jokes about me. She didn't mean to be hurtful, just being silly and honestly coming from her it didn't bother me as I knew by that time that her insecurities came through in this way, i.e. belittling me. I don't know why I am including all this info, guess I just want you to know that other people have problems with their parents. Anyhoo, I got made fun of at school because although I was flat chested, my nipples were larger and "budding" and this was very evident through my shirts.
So if your mom will not get you a bra because she says you don't have enough of a chest to fill one, maybe you could tell her this story and she will understand better. Just explain to her you need one to feel more comfortable about your changing body. I wish I had these words for my mom when I was your age. As it happened I went out by myself and bought my own bra when I was 14. There are even short undershirts you can buy or cami's for young girls. Being 11 is really, really hard! I am 34 now but I remember all to well, unfortunately. Hang in there!

[Kadehadaire]

I got my first bra at 9 or so. Do you get pocket money? Perhaps you could buy yourself one, though of course it is better to go with your mom. :)

[Jake2008]

Pre-teen bras are not what they used to be. There are so many types of comfortable bras that are age-appropriate, comfortable, and reasonably priced. That end of the market has changed dramatically in recent years.

What you might want to do, if your mom has a good friend that you know, ask somebody else to take you. I've done that for a friend of mine, with both her girls, because they were embarrassed to go with their mom. It is time consuming because you have to try them on to fine one that is comfortable and the right fit, but worth the effort. Even if you have to go with another adult.

I don't understand your mom's reluctance over such a simple request. It's just a natural part of growing up at your age.

[rnrg]

hi i am 11 and i just want to ask my mom if when could i get a bra but she always says no. I need help to show my mom that i need a bra. How dob i tel her?

Most young girls (and boys) are nervous about talking it out with their parents as changes take place with their bodies. Maybe you can find a time when you and your mom are alone. Then say something like, "Mom, I was wondering how old you were when you started wearing a bra."

Usually when you start growing in this area, you will find your young breasts tender. It is okay to tell your mom this as well. This should get some kind of response from her. Hopefully, she will "hear" what you are really saying. Ask her if you could get a beginner bra to see what it is like. Be open and honest with her. If this doesn't work, try talking with a close relative like an aunt or grandmother. They are good listeners.

I am a mom and have a daughter a little older than you. She is also the baby of the family. As moms, we don't always want our kids to grow up so fast. But I am learning to be aware of the changes that my sons and daughter are going through and trying to make the changes as simple and easy as possible.

[Jake2008]

Sometimes bras aren't necessarily 'needed', but are a fashion accessory. Also, not all 11 year old's 'need' them, but all their friends have them, and it gives a bit of a confidence boost.

The bigger point is, if they think they need one, for whatever reason, why not just get one.

Incidentally, I know some adult women who don't need them either, but wear them.

It is a good opportunity too, a sort of rite of passage, for a mother and daughter to share the experience of getting your first one, and establish or contribute to the trust bond.

Something this simple may make it easier down the road when she has to ask more important things, such as "Mom, I think I should be on the pill". :eek:

[oobleck]

Well, I don't know if you have an IM (instant message) account, but if our family, our computers are all on different floors, so we have IM to talk to each other... I was far to shy to ask my mother, so one morning I got up and signing into IM and chatted to her for a bit, and then just said 'can I get a bra?' and then I was so freaked before I saw her answer I leapt onto my bed and put my blanket over my face... then I got up and checked the computer, and she had said 'yeah sure! When do you want to go, is tomorrow OK?'

[not my real name100]

You are plenty old to get a bra I got one a week ago I am TEN!!