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    Leona123's Avatar
    Leona123 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 12, 2009, 07:12 AM
    Prostitutes - Can He be trusted
    I have a boyfriend who said he use to sleep with prostitues. These prostitutes were all crackheads. He claims he was lonely and he went to them because it was easy. My question is what type of man can maintain an erection with filthy prostitutes who they know have had different mens semen up in them? Should I trust that he will never go to prostitutes again?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Jul 12, 2009, 07:23 AM

    You trust him the same way you would trust a man who had another girl friend before you, not to get another girlfriend after you.

    You trust them the same way that he will not end up sleeping with a friend from work one day.

    If you can't figure this out, then you really don't need to be in their relationship
    shazamataz's Avatar
    shazamataz Posts: 6,642, Reputation: 1244
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    #3

    Jul 12, 2009, 07:34 AM

    A friend of mine has hired prostitues in the past.

    He is now happily married with a 2 year old girl.

    While sleeping with prostitutes may not be to everyone's taste, it does not make someone untrustworthy.
    He told you about it which was very trusting of him that you would not overreact.
    excon's Avatar
    excon Posts: 21,482, Reputation: 2992
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    #4

    Jul 12, 2009, 07:42 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Leona123 View Post
    My question is what type of man can maintain an erection with filthy prostitutes who they know have had different mens semen up in them? Should I trust that he will never go to prostitutes again?
    Hello L:

    I don't know. Lots of women have different mens semen up in them. Were YOU a virgin when you met him?? What about all that semen up in YOU?

    Look, prostitutes serve a very valuable function in society. In fact, what makes them attractive to guys like your boyfriend, is they don't judge (like YOU'RE doing). That's a VERY positive trait to have. I'd try to get it.

    excon
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
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    #5

    Jul 12, 2009, 06:50 PM
    In the end, prostitutes are people that take money for sex. At least they are up front about what they do, and how they do it. Many people don't take money for sex but substitute other things. Many people also have multiple partners and engage in all sorts of sexual practices that society considers 'deviant'.

    It's just a matter of definition. Calling prostitutes 'filthy' is simply a judgment on your part and not an indication of the truth.

    Your BF has been honest with you about his past sexual activities. He's acknowledged he was lonely and looking for comfort. Rather than judging the people he sought solace with and demeaning them, be grateful that he's been up front with you and trusts you enough to tell you.

    Try and accept that none of us are perfect - we're all human and this is what makes us who we are - let go of your fear and get on with loving your partner. If he trusts you enough to tell you this about himself, return the trust in kind and accept it.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #6

    Jul 12, 2009, 06:55 PM

    I don't condone prostitution but they DO come from all walks of life and most DO wear (as in use them) condoms. So as the others have said they aren't all that much different than a bunch of bad relationships in that sense.

    The thing that matters now is is he devoted to you and in love with YOU! Some people do turn their life around when they meet the right one.
    Catsmine's Avatar
    Catsmine Posts: 3,826, Reputation: 739
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    #7

    Jul 13, 2009, 02:12 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Leona123 View Post
    These prostitutes were all crackheads.
    Did he tell you about the crack? Do you know these people?

    I'd worry more about drug abuse than prostitution.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #8

    Jul 13, 2009, 05:29 AM

    Sleeping with Streetwalkers is bad news, with crack hoes is even worse.

    Escorts are a whole different league. At least they care about their health.

    However I don't see the Prostitute thing being tied to his trustworthiness. They are separate issues, like unless he was seeing them when he was dating you for example of when it WOULD be an issue.

    That being said... I do hope you have been tested, an will get tested regularly as Aids can take 5 years or more to rear its ugly head after exposure.
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #9

    Jul 13, 2009, 04:08 PM

    If he is trustworthy enough to TELL you this, then I say he is trustworthy enough to accept.
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
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    #10

    Jul 13, 2009, 04:10 PM
    Follow your gut instinct. And keep in mind that, given his history of consorting with prostitutes, especially drug-using ones, he may have very well contracted an STD, some of which can be deadly and that he could spread to you.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #11

    Jul 14, 2009, 05:12 AM

    Personally, as a man speaking, one that came of age (as in exited High school) at the time AIDS was first being discovered, and before they knew exactly what it was, I am accutely aware of the risks.

    Drug users, PARTICULARLY drug using street walkers are the furthest thing from my mind... ALWAYS. I don't care how damn horney I would get... I'd spank the monkey before I ever considered those. Few if any streetwalkers think beyond their needs for that day... much less care deeply about what they can catch or even less... spread to others.

    I knew a couple of escorts... (as friends, not as a client) totally different class of person and mindset there. I view anyone who frequents streetwalkers even once as having a serious lack of judgement due to the risk of contracting something without a cure.
    danielnoahsmommy's Avatar
    danielnoahsmommy Posts: 2,506, Reputation: 297
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    #12

    Jul 14, 2009, 05:14 AM

    You both need to be tested for disease
    Leona123's Avatar
    Leona123 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Apr 17, 2011, 11:28 AM

    With regards to me having other mens semen up in me, I assure you I don't have a bunch of different men who I don't love, care about or respect up in me. You can all say what you want, but prostitution is wrong and disgusting. My sister in law is dead today because my brother couldn't keep his penis up out of PROSTITUTES. There is no such thing as a clean prostitute. They may be clean now, but the last guy they just slept with could have just infected them. Also, I've spoken to numerous prostitutes and they say many, many men don't want to use condoms. They charge extra but that still don't change the fact that they can become infected with the very next filthy pig. And besides what type of man would go to a prostitute anyway? Not a good or decent man that's for sure. I am not judging, but right is right and wrong is wrong. Encouraging women to cheapen themselves and to support that is not only wrong but disgusting. You can all say what you want, but you're not going to corrupt my mind.
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
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    #14

    Apr 17, 2011, 11:53 AM

    I take it you are no longer with the 'John'.

    You have no respect for prostitutes or their clients so it stands to reason you had no respect for him. Lack of respect damages a relationship as much as a lack of trust does.

    A person doesn't have to be a prostitute or use their services to have std/sti's etc. I have met more people who thought sex was a sport and to win you have to sleep with (or at least try) anything and everything that has a pulse and breathes. Prostitutes and their clients aren't the only ones who are 'filthy' by some standards. Some of the ones who seem the 'cleanest' would surprise you if you knew what they did when no one was looking.

    I hope you are with someone now who meets your standards.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #15

    Apr 17, 2011, 12:03 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Leona123 View Post
    With regards to me having other mens semen up in me, I assure you I don't have a bunch of different men who I don't love, care about or respect up in me. You can all say what you want, but prostitution is wrong and disgusting. My sister in law is dead today because my brother couldn't keep his penis up out of PROSTITUTES. There is no such thing as a clean prostitute. They may be clean now, but the last guy they just slept with could have just infected them. Also, I've spoken to numerous prostitutes and they say many, many men don't want to use condoms. They charge extra but that still don't change the fact that they can become infected with the very next filthy pig. And besides what type of man would go to a prostitute anyway? Not a good or decent man that's for sure. I am not judging, but right is right and wrong is wrong. Encouraging women to cheapen themselves and to support that is not only wrong but disgusting. You can all say what you want, but you're not going to corrupt my mind.

    You're not judging? Read what you just wrote! If THAT'S not judgmental, I don't know what is. I'd be a whole lot more worried about him having casual sex than I am with him having sex with prostitutes.

    I'm an investigator and I haven't spoken to "numerous" prostitutes - what do you do that puts you in contact with "numerous" prostitutes who are willing to discuss their business with you?

    What kind of men go to prostitutes? Johns like your boyfriend and the man who infected your sister in law.

    Your boyfriend was with a filthy, unclean, infected prostitute and you're asking for advice? So - what did you do? Is his semen still "up in" you? I don't see where HE loves, cares about or respects you. He had paid sex with crackheads because he was lonely and they were easy.

    What does that make you if not "easy."

    And the other way around.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #16

    Apr 18, 2011, 04:44 AM

    It only takes ONE infected partner to ruin your life forever... and end it prematurely. Multiple infected partners only guarantees your fate.

    Actually it is possible to know prostitutes (but more specifically higher class escorts I mean specifically, not streetwalkers) and be aware of their work... without being a customer. But it's a rather particular situation... and most people aren't going to. Most would tend to keep it a closely held secret. They DON'T want that generally made known to the general public.

    And usually its because they have become close friends with you BEFORE they reveal that in confidence to you. And sometimes its who you would least expect. The mother of 4 around the corner, the newlywed couple next door... The WIDOW down the street.

    Not justifying their choice for jobs (there are better even if lower paying jobs out there)... just that you could know one or more right now and never suspect them.

    Now the crack ho's that walk the streets is a whole different can of worms. I can and have avoided that group and class of people altogether most of my life.
    leonabanks's Avatar
    leonabanks Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #17

    Apr 22, 2011, 02:04 AM
    Anyone who is going to try to justify prostitution or escorts (same filthy thing), is a fool. There is no comparison to meeting someone you care about, respect or have a mutual ATTRACTION to, to a prostitute who swallows at least 12 to 15 different men's semen down their throats. If I were to have 12 to 15 different men ejaculate in a cup and give it to you to swallow, would you? If not, why not? You know why not because that is something disgusting and piggish. Yet this is what prostitutes do on a regular. They will even allow you to have sex with them unprotected for a little extra money. You can piss on them, defecate on them, have them toss your salad if you know what I mean…I mean come on anyone who will do such filthy things is definitely mentally ill. Men who go to these mentally ill females and take advantage of these sick minded women should be put to death. It's not just about busting a nut, if that were the case they could just masturbate to do that , it's more about some type of emotional connection or hatred of women that is connected with this. And then these very men, most who are married can go home and look their wives or partners in their face with no guilt or remorse. What good or decent man do you know who can do such rotten things?
    leonabanks's Avatar
    leonabanks Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #18

    Apr 22, 2011, 02:11 AM
    As for JudyKTee, why is it that when people merely speak truth people want to say they are judging someone. No, it's not judging it's an observation and I am merely stating the FACTS. Prostitution is disgusting. I don't care how you try to make light of it. Most of these prostitutes clients are married or in relationships. Do you think these filthy whores care about hurting innocent women and children. Hell no, they don't. I get upset with the female because they are women just like her. The guy is NOT a woman. Women already know how hard it is out here in a world that is geared towards benefiting men. Women ALREADY have a LOT on their plate and for another female to come along and just add to the load women already have on their backs is just EVIL. That's why most women get angry at the other women. We know he's the one who made the commitment and not her. My point is “He is not a Woman, she is” She knows what's up!
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    leonabanks Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #19

    Apr 22, 2011, 02:34 AM
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    You're right, you don't know what is. Casual sex... first of all there is nothing casual about sex. Anything that can produce life or that can kill you is not something to be taken lightly. You must be a lousy investigator. I have spoken to numerous prostitutes because I personally sort them out and paid for information and to talk to them. Especially about what type of men go to them and what do these men request of them. JudyKayTee you'd be surprised to know that 75% if their clients are in relationships. That's a HUGE percent. These very men can then come and look their partner in the face as if nothing. Tell me this is not disgusting to you. It's a low down dirty shame. As for my boyfriends semen still up in me, I have always used condoms and I always will until I am married. Even that's not safe these days. When he had dealing with these filthy pigs and low lifes, he was not with me. Still to go to a prostitute. Who can trust such a character?
    leonabanks's Avatar
    leonabanks Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #20

    Apr 22, 2011, 02:40 AM
    Comment on Cat1864's post
    You're damn skippy I have no respect for prostitutes. What do you think of a person who can allow different men to ejaculate in their mouth and down their throats, use them repeatedly up their rectum, (keep in mind, there is no love, respect, caring, or mutual needs being met here. These men just come up off the street and could have just pulled their thing out of some man, animal or anything and then comes to her. Don't tell me about condoms. I have interviewed many prostitutes out of curiosity and Cat1864 a lot of these men are willing to pay extra to bare back it. I'm sure you must have come across some men who claim they don't like to wear condoms because they can't hardly feel anything or they are starting to suffer for ED and need to feel flesh on flesh. My great hatred for this is because so many INNOCENT wives and partners are affected by this. This is what angers me so badly.

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