[ZoeMarie]

Ok, here's the lowdown. My dad and stepmom built a house the year I graduated in 2001. They built it with the intentions that my brother and I would live there and pay them rent. That's fine. I had a job since I was 16, now that I'm out of school I'll pay rent. Not a big deal. Ok so my brother and I were both paying rent once my brother got out of school and got a full time job.

Everything's fine until my stepmom loses her job. She missed all kind of work and she eventually got let go. She has been unemployed for over 2 years. I moved out last year when my husband and I got married. I would have stayed long to help him pay the mortgage- we stayed 3 months to help out before we found a house. When you just get married you kind of want to be out on your own.

So now my dad's struggling to pay the bills, burning through savings and asking my grandpa for money because his wife won't take a job. "well it's not going to pay as well as my last job." I'm sorry but no, it probably won't. That's something you deal with when you start all over. ANY job is better than NO job.

My dad has now found someone who wants to rent downstairs which in turn will force my brother out. I do not understand why my dad hasn't just flipped out on my stepmom yet. She gets offered a job at quite a few places she interviews but she won't get off her high horse and take one. She turns them down because she wants to do "powerpoint." It's taken a lot to keep my mouth shut but I don't know how much longer I can do this. Sometimes it's so hard to keep the peace, especially when I know my dad is struggling.

[HistorianChick]

Families. Rah. :)

So sorry. Not much you can do, is there?

Go blow bubbles. It helps. Or, get a cup of coffee. That helps, too.

[ZoeMarie]

No there really isn't anything I can do. I just told my brother he could stay at our place until he finds his own. He was staying with my dad because it was easier to save money for a down payment on a house that way.

[HistorianChick]

That's a great thing you're doing for your brother.

Getting bitter is the thing to avoid... trying to see the positive of the situation (you have some time with your brother) is the only thing that's going to help you through this insanity.

Support your Dad. Be there for your brother. Vent, vent, VENT on AMHD when you need to take out some frustration. Use us as a sounding board... it's much better than family! :)

[ZoeMarie]

Exactly why I got on here instead of making a phone call. LOL. This place is great when you need to vent.

[HistorianChick]

Lol... I know! It's awesome. Its our Venterator. :)

[spitvenom]

If this was me I would go straight for the stepmoms throat on this one. My wife has given her brother so much of our money to "help" him, his kids and wife out. We have paid their rent bought diapers formula etc... then I found out him and his wife were doing coke. I told her no more but of course she did for the kids. Then her brother and his wife had the nerve to actually say no one ever helps them out. Well I just lost it I literally grabbed him by the throat and listed all the money we have given him. Then her dad tried to jump and I told him to keep his mouth shut since the only reason he is living in the house he is in is because we gave him X amount of dollars to even have a down payment. Over all it was one of the best Thanksgiving ever.

[jenniepepsi]

I'm sorry your going through this hon. I'm glad you have us to vent on :D vent away. I hope she pulls her head out of her rear end and accepts a job, even if its 'below her'

[ZoeMarie]

I too hope that she pulls her head out of her rear. I don't understand why they don't try to sell the house, rather than find strangers to live downstairs.

[N0help4u]

Your step mom is being way too picky and selfish.
I bet she would make at least as much as you were paying in rent. I bet she could find a part time job if she refuses to work a full time one that she hates.

They should have been looking at all the 'what if's' all along
Like what if Zoe and her brother move out once they turn 18.
There really isn't anything you can do and don't feel obligated to lend them money either. The month after you do they will just need more anyway.

[ZoeMarie]

Thanks N0help. Yeah, for the first few months after we got married I felt like maybe we should stay for a bit just to help them out but after 3 months it was enough. I would hear about her turning down jobs left and right. Apparently she just got offered a job at a nursing home but didn't want to work with old people so she might not take that either. I'm sorry but what a B!&#$. What's wrong with old people? I could go on and on about this but I think I'll just stop there. LOL. I just really don't understand her.

[N0help4u]

My one neighbor is like that. People like this are so high and mighty in their attitude about themselves yet at the same time they are miserable with themselves. They end up taking it out on everybody else. They think they are too good for anything.
My neighbor couldn't keep a job for more than two months because every job was beneath her. Yet she didn't know how to do anything except use a cash register.

[spitvenom]

My wife has a friend who can never hold a job. After the first day she'll come over and tell us about what the company is doing wrong and how stupid everyone is there. We try to explain to her that it is her first day keep your mouth shut and do your job. That will last a week and then she will literally tell her boss that he/she is an idiot and she has no idea how they even have a job and then she will walkout. I just don't understand that.

[ZoeMarie]

Tactful! Hahaha. Don't people understand that jobs (although they're not always fun/rewarding etc.) are necessary to pay bills?

[Kagan88]

im sorry your going thru this hon. im glad you have us to vent on :D vent away. i hope she pulls her head out of her rear end and accepts a job, even if its 'below her'

No job is below anyone that doesn't have one due to them thinking they are too good for a job...

Sorry to hear about your situation... but vent here that's what I do! Amazing group of people to vent to! If I were you though I would stay strong for your dad and your brother after enough time your dad will say something to your step mom hopefully...

[I wish]

Really sorry to hear about your situation.

I hope that your dad is happy with your step-mom though.

Has there been any updates since?

[ZoeMarie]

Well she did start a couple days ago at the job that she didn't want, working with "old people" as she put it. I just wonder how long she'll stay.

To be honest I don't know if my dad is happy with her or not. I used to think so, but I've been asking myself the same thing lately.