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ayejay0601 · Jun 1, 2009, 08:52 AM

Hello all:

Having recently been broken up with my girlfriend and reading some of the posts on this site, I became curious as to why girls break up vs. why guys break up when there is really nothing wrong with the relationship (ie no fighting no obvious cheating, etc). I don't think its always the same reason. Here are my thoughts

Common reasons Guys break up:
(1) They have met another girl that they are really attracted to--have not cheated but want to explore it
(2) They are no longer attracted to their girlfriend (she has gained weight for example)
(3) They miss being single
(4) They hear tales from their single guys friends about their crazy lives
(5) Girl is intruding too much on his life and preventing him from doing the things he likes to do; i.e. girl is clingy and needy

Common reasons girls break up:
(1) Her friends don't like her boyfriend
(2) She doesn't feel chemistry
(3) She likes the guy as a best friend but not romantically
(4) She doesn't know if he is "the one"
(5) She is concerned about his ability to take care of her in the future
(6) She likes his bas- bad-boy properties to date, but not for husband.

Just curious what you guys think about this list and whether you would agree or have anything to add.

I just think its important so that us lonely, single, broken-hearted souls can pay attention to these issues in our future relationships?

I wish · Jun 1, 2009, 08:57 AM

That's a huge generalization. Everyone is different and if you encounter one that is different, all those reasons are thrown out the door.

The best thing to do is listen to your significant other and have a strong communication system.

ayejay0601 · Jun 1, 2009, 09:00 AM

I don't disagree with you, but the problem is that I feel like people very rarely tell the truth. People often don't even know why they are breaking up but they just know they need to.

Are you really going to tell your girlfriend that she is fat and that is the reason you are breaking up or that there is someone else?

I don't know, I guess I just need to rationalize my own breakup. Sorry if this list offends anyone

Romefalls19 · Jun 1, 2009, 09:05 AM

I disagree with this list. I've broken up for a lot of reasons, have always told the truth to them. Yes, I've told a girl, "I found someone else" I've also said that I am not longer feeling an attractive connection between the two of us. There are ways to be honest, but not hurtful(weight problem)

People break up for all sorts of reasons, no gender specifics should be given on reasons.

I wish · Jun 1, 2009, 09:09 AM

People are just trying to find a balance.

It's not that people lie about the reasons to break up. It's because they feel guilty and don't want to hurt the other person. So they water down or just give other less hurtful reasons.

ayejay0601 · Jun 1, 2009, 09:27 AM

I agree. But that's why its so important to find out the real reason. Because its great that they care enough to try to be polite. Buts important for us to know the truth.

Maybe he or she is "just not that into you" But there still has to be underlying reasons...

I wish · Jun 1, 2009, 09:43 AM

Originally Posted by ayejay0601

I agree. But thats why its so important to find out the real reason. Because its great that they care enough to try to be polite. Buts important for us to know the truth.

Maybe he or she is "just not that into you" But there still has to be underlying reasons...

Why does the real reason matter anymore? A break up is a break up. There was a change of feelings, that's the only reason that really matters.

jmw0713 · Jun 1, 2009, 10:45 AM

Every situation is different, so different in fact that I don't think you can make a top 5 reasons list.

Half the time, the people involved don't even know the reason why they break-up... they just do because of the way they feel toward their partner and the relationship at that time.

liz28 · Jun 1, 2009, 12:00 PM

All the reasons you listed for why guys break-up with girls and why girls break-up with guys can be used for both genders.

Instead of dwelling on this issue you need to accept it is over and completely let go.

Relationships comes with no guarantees and people change. That's life! But the great thing life is that you can learn with things and keep it moving. There are others girls out there.

kctiger · Jun 1, 2009, 01:21 PM

This can all be summed up with my two reasons:

Guys break up with a girl because: They aren't getting enough sex

Girls break up with a guys because: The guys always want sex (and because we leave the toilet seat up)

Everything else is merely circumstantial. :cool:

alisadancer · Jan 28, 2010, 03:24 PM

Honestly I don't think the reason for the breakup matters very much
We all know its hard to get over and we wonder if we could fix it but if the person broke up with you it doesn't matter what the reason because obviiously they didn't care enough to try to fix things so you need to just move on and remember it as a passed relationship not a possibility for the future

jj1212 · Jun 16, 2011, 07:49 PM

Mature adults don't break up for any of these reasons. I personally broke up with a great girl because after a few months I realized we're just different people. I'm outgoing and like to crack jokes and she is quiet and laughs but doesn't contribute much to conversation.

A relationship is good when you can be doing nothing and entertain each other. I didn't have that and that's why I need to move on and keep looking.

jj1212 · Jun 16, 2011, 07:49 PM

Mature adults don't break up for any of these reasons. I personally broke up with a great girl because after a few months I realized we're just different people. I'm outgoing and like to crack jokes and she is quiet and laughs but doesn't contribute much to conversation.

A relationship is good when you can be doing nothing and entertain each other. I didn't have that and that's why I need to move on and keep looking.