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    michellet218's Avatar
    michellet218 Posts: 51, Reputation: 0
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    #1

    May 14, 2009, 10:19 AM
    Should you have to pay child support even if you take good care of your child?
    Hey,

    My boyfriend has a 5 yr old daughter by a greedy gold diggin' baby mama (which they do not get along at all!). His child lives with her mother. He takes much care of his daughter, buying her stuff that she needs/wants, spending time w/ her, picking her up from daycare, etc... Basically, he does everything a father is supposed to do. But still, the crazy baby mama has him on child support. If he's taking good care of his child now, then why do he have to be on child support if he's already supporting his child? Is there a way for him to legally stop paying child support as long as he continue to take care of his child? Dang, just because he don't live with her &the baby mama doesn't mean he should be put on child support! I think this is so unfair! He is already low income, so it's so hard for him to take care of her AND pay child support at the same time! I see no point in that! If he was a dead beat, then I would understand him paying child support. But he is not a deadbeat! He is a great father! Anyway, IS THERE A WAY FOR HIM TO LEGALLY STOP PAYING CHILD SUPPORT if he has proof that he's taking care of his child?
    Please, this is a serious topic, no sarcastic or rude comments, please.

    Thanks for all your help!:D
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    May 14, 2009, 10:23 AM

    No, there's no way to stop child support. He is responsible for a portion of the child's food, electric, living expenses. Gifts, taking the child places, even buying clothing does NOT take the place of child support.

    If he feels child support is unreasonable, then he needs to go back to Court and request a reduction based on changed circumstances.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
    Expert
     
    #3

    May 14, 2009, 10:26 AM

    Does he send her money for part of the child's guardians ( mother) rent, does he pay part of the food, the electric

    They are suppose to pay child support plus health care, plus 1/2 of the doctor plus 1/2 of day care normally.

    So sorry he should be doing all of that plus child support,
    michellet218's Avatar
    michellet218 Posts: 51, Reputation: 0
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    #4

    May 14, 2009, 10:30 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    No, there's no way to stop child support. He is responsible for a portion of the child's food, electric, living expenses. Gifts, taking the child places, even buying clothing does NOT take the place of child support.

    If he feels child support is unreasonable, then he needs to go back to Court and request a reduction based on changed circumstances.
    But he does all of that you just mentioned! Field trips, traveling, birthday gifts, xmas gifts,etc... food all the time, doctor appts, bonding, just everything a child needs to survive he helps with it! Not just clothes... He takes care of everything for her including living expenses. He doesn't pay for the baby mama's light bill. He has his child every week, so paying rent, lite bills, etc.. He will only pay at his own house, because the child comes over there, too.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #5

    May 14, 2009, 10:34 AM

    Then take your proof back to Court and get the support order changed.

    As I said - buying food does NOT take the place of paying child support.

    I know it's hard to understand but that's the law.
    michellet218's Avatar
    michellet218 Posts: 51, Reputation: 0
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    #6

    May 14, 2009, 10:35 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    Does he send her money for part of the childs guardians ( mother) rent, does he pay part of the food, the electric

    they are suppose to pay child support plus health care, plus 1/2 of the doctor plus 1/2 of day care normally.

    So sorry he should be doing all of that plus child support,
    Yes, he pays for her food, too. Putting groceries in her mama's house. But he has a place of his own that he has to pay rent, lite bill, water bill etc... and the child is always over w/ him, so he will need running water & lites at his place as well. He can't afford to pay 2 rents and 2 lite bills! I don't think anyone can afford that in these hard times. Not even me. He has her on his health plan he got from work, so he pays for her health insurance, and doctor bills. But they go half on daycare. I told you, he pays just about everything!
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #7

    May 14, 2009, 10:40 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by michellet218 View Post
    Yes, he pays for her food, too. putting groceries in her mama's house. but he has a place of his own that he has to pay rent, lite bill, water bill etc... and the child is always over w/ him, so he will need running water & lites at his place as well. He can't afford to pay 2 rents and 2 lite bills! i don't think anyone can afford that in these hard times. not even me. He has her on his health plan he got from work, so he pays for her health insurance, and doctor bills. but they go half on daycare. i told ya'll, he pays just about everything!

    Paying everything and paying Court ordered child support are two very different things.

    You are reading but not hearing what I say. I don't make the rules. I'm quoting the law. This is not a message board.

    I think this thread should be closed because arguing is not going to get us anywhere.

    He needs to either pay the amount ordered by the Court or appeal the Order and get that amount changed. There is no other way, there are no other explanations or circumstances.
    michellet218's Avatar
    michellet218 Posts: 51, Reputation: 0
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    #8

    May 14, 2009, 10:41 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    Then take your proof back to Court and get the support order changed.

    As I said - buying food does NOT take the place of paying child support.

    I know it's hard to understand but that's the law.

    You said buying food does not take place of paying child support. That's just a little bit of child support. Child support is something you pay to support the child. Just like if the mother & father were still together, and living under the same roof, whatever the child needs in that type of environment,that will be supporting the child. That's exactly what the child needs if the mama&pops were split up. So if he can take care of her if they were togther were split up, then why do he still have to pay child support if he's already "supporting"the child in every way possible?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #9

    May 14, 2009, 10:42 AM

    BECAUSE THAT'S THE LAW.

    Now do you get it?

    The law requires CASH to the custodial parent, not barter, not services, not goods.

    Time to close the thread.
    michellet218's Avatar
    michellet218 Posts: 51, Reputation: 0
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    #10

    May 14, 2009, 10:45 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    Paying everything and paying Court ordered child support are two very different things.

    You are reading but not hearing what I say. I don't make the rules. I'm quoting the law. This is not a message board.

    I think this thread should be closed because arguing is not going to get us anywhere.

    He needs to either pay the amount ordered by the Court or appeal the Order and get that amount changed. There is no other way, there are no other explanations or circumstances.
    Woah woah woah!! Who said we were arguing? Come one now, it's not that serious! Calm down, seriously! I just asked a question, and we're responding back and forth to each other. I don't think that should be called "arguing". I understand you're quoting the law, all I asked for were opinions, not an argument. Why are you taking what I say the wrong way? OK, that's all. Thank you for your help. If the thread gets closed, then at least I got some helpful info.
    p.s. calm down
    Curlyben's Avatar
    Curlyben Posts: 18,514, Reputation: 1860
    BossMan
     
    #11

    May 14, 2009, 11:05 AM
    >Thread Closed<
    As it is has simply become argumentative and confrontational.

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