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    digitaldan's Avatar
    digitaldan Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 22, 2006, 10:52 AM
    I Want my Ex Back
    Hiya,

    Yesterday my girlfriend broke up with me, a day before our 6 Month Anniversary. But I love her so much. I believe I pushed her away as I began getting too Clingy to her and not giving her the space I wanted and getting moody when she didn't spend time with me when she wanted to spend time with her friends, I never wanted her to be with anyone but me.

    I unfortunately realised this too late and the damage had already been done. She said she hasn't loved me for a week or two and finally had to break the news to me. She still wants to be friends and she has been consolling me the past couple of days, but I love her so much and want her back. Is there anyway I can do this even though she says she doesn't know if she'll ever love me again and that were not going to get back together (Which Im beginning to accept now). She's told this to all her friends as well who have confirmed this.

    Its difficult as we both attend the same school and have classes together, where I sit next to her (And can't move due the unavailbility of space).
    I can't help but think she may still Love me deep down as when we broke up I asked her for one last kiss and she prolonged it. She claimed that she wanted to make the last one a good one but I just don't know. She also said the gifts I gave her were sweet and she couldn't stop smiling when I should her a photo album of us together at our first times (Parties etc). Yet she says she doesn't love me deep down anymore either!

    I want her back, it hurts so much, I don't know what to do!

    Anyone got any ideas, I want to win her back.

    Thanks!
    Krs's Avatar
    Krs Posts: 2,906, Reputation: 320
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    #2

    Sep 29, 2006, 05:04 AM
    Give her space, leave her be!
    By doing so she may just realise what she lost.
    Don't be Clingy! As that was the reason she broke up in the first place.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Sep 29, 2006, 07:08 AM
    Take hold of your life and do as she wishes, be friends or leave her alone about a relationship. She doesn't want you being moody when she has something to do or clingy, you already know this so get a life you enjoy without her and stop the misery to yourself and accept the fact its OVER.
    digitaldan's Avatar
    digitaldan Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Sep 30, 2006, 05:15 AM
    OK, we had a row to the extent she didn't want to talk to me anymore however I just sent a message back saying that if she needs a friend I'll be here. She sent me a message back 10 minutes later. We agreed to give each other space and it has worked and she seems to be OK with me except at certain times when she suddenly becomes very "off" with me.

    I realise now that its going to take time and that the chances of us getting back together are slim, however I shall always retain a small glimpse of hope, I just now hope to build and maintain a friendship with her (As we never really had one before our relationship)

    Any tips?

    I still want her back so tips to win her back and tips to build a friendship would be greatly appreciated!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    Sep 30, 2006, 05:40 AM
    Good grief give her what she asked for and take the time to work on yourself. No contact, let her contact you.
    digitaldan's Avatar
    digitaldan Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Sep 30, 2006, 12:44 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman
    Good grief give her what she asked for and take the time to work on yourself. No contact, let her contact you.
    I should have mentioned the row started in a conversation she did start, and it was based on something which she didn't believe me about (Although looking back I can see why she was suspicious at what I was saying). I made it clear though that I was just trying to help as a friend and if she needs someone to talk to I'm here, that's when she decided to tlk to me again, 10 minutes after she declared she didn't want to talk to me ever again.

    And I am giving her the things she's asked for.

    Its just difficult as I have to sit next to her at least twice a day with no chance of moving away for the time being.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Sep 30, 2006, 01:07 PM
    Be polite but do you want her as a friend? Can your ego handle that? This is too much drama and too close for me. But I guess there is no hiding so be nice but keep your distance.
    digitaldan's Avatar
    digitaldan Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Sep 30, 2006, 01:11 PM
    Of course I want her as a friend, when we were a couple she was my best friend. If she doesn't want to be a couple again, then its my own fault. I don't want to lose a friend as well.

    I also want her to be happy as well, and if I can't do that as a boyfriend, I want to be able to be there as a friend.

    I just want to know how I can win back her trust, maybe her love. The trust is the most important thing to me though.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #9

    Sep 30, 2006, 03:10 PM
    It takes time and no one can rush that.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #10

    Sep 30, 2006, 04:42 PM
    Look, she is an ex for a reason. Whether it was your idea for a breakup or hers, there was a reason.

    If you continue to contact her, whether she initiated the contact or not, she will continue to push you away.

    It is time to let her be. The more clingy you are, the more she will want to stay away from you.

    You need to cease all communication whatsoever.

    Looking back, I am glad my ex's are ex's. They are considered an ex for a reason. However, most of my ex's are now my friends, but it took years to accomplish that goal.

    You may never win back her love. That is up to her and not you. Just leave her be. She will miss you more if there is no contact at all.
    digitaldan's Avatar
    digitaldan Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Oct 1, 2006, 07:59 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9
    Look, she is an ex for a reason. Whether it was your idea for a breakup or hers, there was a reason.

    If you continue to contact her, whether she initiated the contact or not, she will continue to push you away.

    It is time to let her be. The more clingy you are, the more she will want to stay away from you.

    You need to cease all communication whatsoever.

    Looking back, I am glad my ex's are ex's. They are considered an ex for a reason. However, most of my ex's are now my friends, but it took years to accomplish that goal.

    You may never win back her love. That is up to her and not you. Just leave her be. She will miss you more if there is no contact at all.

    Yea but as I've said before, I have to sit next to her at least twice a day, so not communicated at all its extremely difficult, plus the group of friends we have e all hang out together, so it just makes things more difficult, any idea what I can do in this situation.

    Im going to distance myself from her completely but I have to be around her otherwise I can't be with my other friends.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #12

    Oct 1, 2006, 09:58 AM
    Always be glad for the time you have spent and appreciate it, never talk against her. Just be a man and be polite and a friend. At your age I admire you for being mature enough to be a friend with an ex. Kudos

    I say this because many who are older and supposedly wiser have not mastered the skill of friendship.
    digitaldan's Avatar
    digitaldan Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Oct 1, 2006, 11:47 AM
    Well I'm hoping we can be friends, I certainly want to be friends. But I suppose time is the only healer in this situation. Unfortunately for me, its difficult, trying to keep distant from her whilst having to work with her at the same time.

    I'll try my best to cope. I just pray that I don't lose a friend.

    Thanks for all your advice, although more is greatly appreciated if there is any more to give. Otherwise thanks anyway! Cheers!
    digitaldan's Avatar
    digitaldan Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #14

    Oct 10, 2006, 02:10 PM
    Well been a week and man its hard!

    Been trying my best to distance myself but its difficult in my situation!
    Gangster1's Avatar
    Gangster1 Posts: 60, Reputation: 3
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    #15

    Nov 20, 2006, 10:37 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by digitaldan
    Hiya,

    Yesterday my girlfriend broke up with me, a day before our 6 Month Anniversary. But I love her soo much. I believe I pushed her away as I began getting too Clingy to her and not giving her the space I wanted and getting moody when she didnt spend time with me when she wanted to spend time with her friends, I never wanted her to be with anyone but me.

    I unfortunatly realised this too late and the damage had already been done. She said she hasnt loved me for a week or two and finally had to break the news to me. She still wants to be friends and she has been consolling me the past couple of days, but I love her soo much and want her back. Is there anyway I can do this even though she says she dosnt know if she'll ever love me again and that were not gonna get back together (Which Im beginning to accept now). Shes told this to all her friends aswell who have confirmed this.

    Its difficult as we both attend the same school and have classes together, where I sit next to her (And can't move due the unavailbility of space).
    I can't help but think she may still Love me deep down as when we broke up I asked her for one last kiss and she prolonged it. She claimed that she wanted to make the last one a good one but I just dont know. She also said the gifts I gave her were sweet and she couldnt stop smiling when I should her a photo album of us together at our first times (Parties etc). Yet she says she dosnt love me deep down anymore either!

    I want her back, it hurts soo much, i dont know what to do!

    Anyone got any ideas, I wanna win her back.

    Thanks!
    give her space and move on try to go out there and meet someother people even if is only friendship. Don't push her into coming back to you because that will make her even go away instead of bring her back. Go out there and have fun, give her the space she needs and if she really loves you she will come back. Good luck

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