[aspasia]

I have a five month old boy very determined to do everything sooner than expected, that gets very upset when he cannot reach his goals. Or so it seems. At the moment he cries all the time, unless I help him sit up and touch everything he can reach or if we "read" books together. Does not want to be by himself at all, does not want to sleep, even when he is tired and does not eat well -has never been very keen on milk anyway. I'm alone all day long and cannot do what he wants all the time, but there seems to be nothing to hold his interest. I know this sounds like very spoiled behavior and maybe it is. It has gotten to a point where I never know if he is hungry, tired or just plain bored. Can anyone help?

[Fr_Chuck]

If you have taken him to a doctor and have ruled out any medical issues.

Yes, he has you trained very well, I want attention, I cry and I get it.

The hardest thing I have ever done is let our son cry about 3 hours for 2 or 3 nights, till he got used to sleeping at night, then he sleep all night at night because he learned he had to.

And yes they get upset when they don't get their way, you lay him down at regular times each day for naps, and he will stay there and cry for a while till he goes to sleep finally ( normally)

And when children are really tired that is when they often have the hardest time going to sleep.

So this means it he has trained you to do what he wants , when he wants and how he wants it done.

But the good or bad news, he will be trying to do that the rest of his life.

[J_9]

I agree with the good Fr Chuck here. He has you trained VERY well.

Children this age are wonderful manipulators. You are going to have to let him cry it out. It takes patience, but it can be done. He needs to begin learning to explore on his own at his own pace.

When you pick them up every time they cry or want to be entertained they learn that they don't have to do things for themselves. They have effectively trained you to do for them.

So, be patient, let him cry and all will be right with the world soon.

[KristinaS]

Does he have colic? Try feeding him goats milk. That cured my daughter.

[Sentra]

My youngest daughter went through that phase, and it almost did me in emotionally. It got to where whenever she cried, I broke out into tears and blamed myself for any pain she was going through, and that was until a family member told me to snap out of it. Spending 24/7 with my baby might have been a loving notion but it wasn't healthy; sometimes we begin to lose sight and get in that 'mommy funk', so placing your mind on something else for a few minutes out of the day could be nice. Your baby has you trained, dearie.

I know exactly what it is like, and how hard it is to just sit there and let your baby cry it out; hearing them just pulls at your heartstrings. If you have to step into the hallway for a few minutes to catch your breath while he is having a tantrum, do it. If you've done everything possible and he still has what I like to call the 'whinies', place him around his baby toys or in his baby chair so that something stimulating will catch his attention. Try a change of scenery every once in a while: Going outside, giving him a warm bath, waltzing with him around the room or a walk in the park may be as beneficial for you as it may be for him.

**These are things I tried, things progressed slowly, but surely** Good luck to you, take care and congrats on having a little baby that loves to try and get ahead! :)

[aspasia]

Just an update to tell you all that things are going a lot better! I guess that what made the difference is me finally deciding that I AM the mother and maybe he needs ME to decide a few things for him. I'm not sure that I'm saying it exactly right, but that is how it feels and it does seem to work for both of us. Of course there are still difficult moments and, yes Sentra, you are so right, being "on call" 24/7 is very... well, I don't think words are enough. Thank you all for your help!

[Sentra]

Take care sweetie!! :)