[teastalk]

You never see your girlfriend or boyfriend except for maybe once a week. Do you think receiving a phone call a day from your boyfriend or girlfriend is too much?

[Wondergirl]

How long would the call last and what would be said? Is she doing all the talking?

[talaniman]

Its up to the partners to define how a relationship works. Everyone is different.

[Bubble00020]

No I think if yous only see each other once a week, you need some way to keep the relationship going. I only see my boyfriend at the weekend but he phones me loads everyday and I look forward to his calls. Just seeing his name on caller id makes me light up :)

[teastalk]

Some couples talk on the phone a lot. Some don't talk hardly at all on the phone. Do you think that asking to talk on the phone once a day is too much?

If it's too much, do you think that the partner who is unhappy with the phone calls should tell the other partner that?

[crazychick56]

Does he or she seem unhappy with these phonecalls?

And wondergirl is right, it differs, how long do these conversations last?

I see no problem with it unless you two have already talked plenty much and should maybe do something besides stay on the phone but then again you only see each other once a week.

If you phone him or her once a day then just don't make it too long conversations and you should be fine and also talk to him or her about this and get his or her opinion.

Also, if he or she doesn't care then I think its your right to at least let them know you want to talk to them... don't you agree?

[teastalk]

At first things were OK, just like the beginning always is. Then I noticed that I was doing all the talking. I was unhappy because I felt like I cared more than the other person.

At first the phone convos were long, then they became shorter and shorter. Sometimes lasting approximately 5min or less.

[hellokitty00]

It depends on how long. But either way, you only see each other like once a week, so communication is very much needed in these times.

[crazychick56]

In a way hellokitty is right, communication is key and a relationship can't last without some sort of communication.

Now granted it won't be as strong as it could be just by long distance or mostly on the phone instead of seeing him or her but that's the only way it can keep up now is phone communication, there is no other way unless he or she just wants to see you that once or twice a week and then nothing else and in that case observe the way he behaves, does he enjoy beong with you in person? If so than OK, great, if not, then you might want to end it. Enough said.

Now, how about not being the one to call him or her for a few days, see if he or she calls you, and if he or she doesn't, they clearly aren't as interested as you are and maybe that should only be a friendship at this moment and not a realationship to where you guys could work your way back up when things were resolved. Thanks... best of luck to you.

[teastalk]

Thank you for your input!

I'm not actually the one calling. I think we've gotten into this method of communication because I had said that if we didn't see each other, then I wanted to at least talk by phone. I said we didn't have to do it, but now we're talking to each other every night like this.

[crazychick56]

You have to get the truth out of him or her because just because somebody says that they want to or will do something doesn't mean that its true

[teastalk]

Yeah, the only problem is that when I've asked about it he says it's fine.

I don't want to keep asking and asking because that becomes annoying.

[crazychick56]

I know what you mean but can you PULL the truth away from what is actually the truth and if not there really is nothing else to do unless A. he comes out and tells you something about it or B. you just assume things and end it which would come with more problems...


So either way I think this is something no matter how many times asked you have to work out together

[teastalk]

Ah, you have just made me realize that it is important for him to share his feeling with me rather than just me feeling there is something wrong and not knowing how to fix it.

[crazychick56]

So is it better?

Do you understand?

Do let us know how this all goes:D

[Syzygy]

The reason he probably doesn't talk much is because he probably doesn't have much to say. A phone call everyday may make someone run out of things to say especially if they're in school or something and it's the same old routine everyday and they're just studying the rest of the time.

You may just be the more social one of the relationship. Just because he doesn't talk doesn't mean he doesn't necessarily not care - he cares enough to listen to you talk.

However, I am not in your position and if you really do get the vibe from his responses/reactions that he doesn't care much, you should playfully bring up the problem in a manner where it will not turn into an argument. Maybe he just needs a little encouraging to speak up. Or perhaps since you talk all the time he is just too afraid to interrupt. Talk with him about it.

[crazychick56]

Thank you all for your posts but I actually think she stated that she has come to realize this:) they have it under control from here:)