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soulXpeace · Mar 23, 2009, 02:49 PM

I'm 15 and I have this 19 yr old boyfriend I'm a freshman and he is a senior in HS

I've been told things about the age and things like that but we decided it doesn't matter to us . We are pretty serious but there is no sex and he says he will wait until I'm one hundred percent sure that it is what I want and I would like to introduce him to my parents but I would like to know if it would be OK in the state of Michigan to legaly date if he is 19 and I'm 15?

chrissymarie · Mar 23, 2009, 02:58 PM

Sure dating is legal, but sex may not be legal. Check within your state laws. Besides 15 is too young to be having sex. You should wait until your at least 17 and then it will not be illegal. Laws for statutory rape are put there for a reason.

ScottGem · Mar 23, 2009, 03:56 PM

There are no laws governing dating. Any laws regulating an age gap refer to sexual activity.

That being said, I wonder how long you have been with this guy. I also wonder about a 19 yr old still in HS

liz28 · Mar 23, 2009, 04:45 PM

What do you think your parents will say? Even if there was a such law that you could date this guy they have the ultimate say so in this matter. If you was my daughter you wouldn't be dating him or anyone else.

Murraystate · Mar 23, 2009, 06:01 PM

I agree you are too young to be having sex. Just wait it is way better when you are older. I too wonder how long you have been dating. Dated a guy two years older than me and I wasn't 18 yet... but we had to stay away from sex. I know in Wisconsin you can go to prison for sometime if someone even thinks you are having sex and they can't prove you are a virgin! You need to ask yourself 1.will he really wait?
2. is it really worth it. You are very young still and college is around the corner.. maybe having a boyfriend isn't really what you need right now? Just soul search a bit.
... and don't hide him from your parents... though it may be hard honesty is always the best thing you can do.. even if it doesn't work out the way you want it to.

Good luck! :)

ScottGem · Mar 23, 2009, 06:04 PM

Comments on this post
Miller11 disagrees: Just because he's 19 and still in High School doesn't mean he's a bad person maybe he got held back or started school late but that has nothing to do with her dating him. That is not what she's asking

First, may I call your attention to the guidelines for using the comments feature found here:

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/feedba...ure-24951.html

I simply said that still being in HS at 19 makes me wonder. I didn't say he was a bad person. But if he was left back, don't you think that would be a red flag?

soulXpeace · Mar 23, 2009, 06:05 PM

We are not having sex I'm not ready yet and he understands that

We have been together 5 going on six months

He just turned 19

I have no idea what my parents have to say hopefully good things

soulXpeace · Mar 23, 2009, 06:06 PM

We are not having sex!

ScottGem · Mar 23, 2009, 06:18 PM

Originally Posted by soulXpeace

We are not having sex!

That's good, but I still think he's too old for you. An age gap of 3-4 years is huge at your ages. Wait a few years and if you still have feelings for each other, try again.

Fr_Chuck · Mar 23, 2009, 06:19 PM

Well depends on where you live, for example in some states you can't have sex till you are 18, so he is willing to wait 3 years,

And of course normally the issues is, and you won't agree of course, at 15 a person no matter how mature, is not old enough, or experienced enough to be dating a boy that is so much older, since they can easily talk a younger person into things most of the time.

soulXpeace · Mar 23, 2009, 06:33 PM

He wouldn't do talk me into things he honestly isn't like that I know him and he understands that I'm not ready and he said he will wait

He's very nice sweet I trust him more then anybody he listens to me and he has always been there for me

I was wondering if I was legal for us because John ( his name by the way ) is a marine and he leaves for training in cali in July and will be gone for three months and a week and I wanted my parents to meet him before he leaves

ScottGem · Mar 23, 2009, 06:41 PM

We answered the legality question already. But if you are going to ignore our advice, why ask for it?

soulXpeace · Mar 23, 2009, 06:54 PM

I was clearing things up... sorry?

Fr_Chuck · Mar 23, 2009, 06:56 PM

Yes, I think they should fully meet him, but to be honest, he may not want his Sgt to know he is dating a 15 year old.

soulXpeace · Jun 6, 2009, 10:05 PM

Threads merged
I'm a 15 yr old dating a 19 yr old. I was talking about him with my older sister and she started joking about statutory rape (sp?) and I thought that that was having sexual intercourse with someone who is under the age of 18 while the other person is over 18, so my question is, is there any way that my boyfriend could possibly get in trouble even if all we do is kissing and cuddling and those things? we are not having sex and we never had in the past before this question came up.

Justwantfair · Jun 6, 2009, 10:13 PM

The relationship goals of a fifteen yo and a nineteen yo are very different, it's like three years ago when you were twelve and going out with your boyfriend, but it didn't involved going out or doing anything!

Your boyfriend can be charged with statutory rape if you are having a sexual relationship with him and there isn't any doubt that he wants one. Kissing and cuddling are steps and unless you will be only kissing and cuddling for the next three years, which is highly doubtful, he can be charged when the relationship progresses.

At fifteen, in many states, you are not old enough to give consent for sexual relations, that is why this is against the law. He is older and mature enough to know this.

I wish · Jun 7, 2009, 04:31 AM

As long as you don't have sex.

He definitely should be old enough to know this.

Look for someone your own age or wait until you turn 18 at least before considering him your boyfriend.

talaniman · Jun 7, 2009, 11:21 AM

So my question is, is there any way that my boyfriend could possibly get in trouble even if all we do is kissing and cuddling and those things?

Others have answered your legal question. I will address the other part, can he get in trouble for kissing and cuddling with you? Yes, your parents can get him in big trouble, and file a complaint (contributing to the delinquency of a minor) informing his job, or the army.

Your parents are the law as far as your concerned. Hiding him will make them angry, and could be bad for you also. You really should have talked to them, instead of hiding it. Do so as soon as possible.

You could lose trust with them, and your freedom. So yes you both can be in big time trouble.

That's why it's a lousy idea, to even be sneaking around, let alone call yourself dating a guy that old.

ScottGem · Jun 7, 2009, 12:25 PM

Statutory rape covers ANY sexual activity which is defined as touching genatalia. So intercourse is not the only criteria for statutory rape.

To be it bluntly, you are what is known as jail bait.

liz28 · Jun 7, 2009, 12:53 PM

It doesn't seems like you really care because your still dating him. So go ask your parents if it is legal or not.