[Puzzled]

I need some advise from some female bloggers...

Recently I've been dating a co-worker who has just ended a 3 1/2 year relationship about 4 months ago. We hit it off great as we have so many
Things in common especially our outlook in life. However, when things started to get more serious in terms of pursuing a relationship, suddenly she backed off. She's says it's too soon and the timing is bad. She also said that if there is any chance of us making it work, I'll have to give her time.

Now my question is... in telling me it's bad timing, is it a way of telling me she's not interested and I should move on? I've had this happen to me a few times now and I've waited to no avail. By stepping back, there's always the chance of losing her. She is an awesome person, someone who I don't
Want to lose as I think she is really worth the wait.

Puzzled & patiently waiting... :confused:

[Wildcat21]

I am a guy... but I have a strong, strong feeling that...

YOU CAME ON TOO STRONG!!

When she said that you should have backed off and moved on... not contact her at all..

Bey $1 million you kept contacting her.

Women need a chase. I amsure you did not give her a chase.

Plus - bad idea to date c-workers... really bad. Don't let this get ugly. Leave her alone - let her figure it out.

[talaniman]

After 4 months this women is still mourning the break-up of 3 and a half years. No way is this enough time to get rid of old feelings. When time does take its coure no one can say how she will feel about you so in the meantime give her space and move on with the things you do without her. As Wildcat has stated you could have pushed to hard and she wasn't ready for the same kind of relationship you are.

[Wildcat21]

Read tal's thread - he diagnosee this 1000% correctly. You pushed too hard - too soon.

Your interest level - at least to her - always should be a little bit lower than hers... at leas that's how you need to come across.

I bet yours was sky high... and she was just trying to figureo ut if she actually liked you.

[s_cianci]

I don't necessarily think she's telling you that she's not interested and that you should just move on. I think she's telling you exactly what she feels. Given the circumstances it's perfectly logical that she'd want some time before rushing in to anything. Yes, there's the chance that things will never work out but I don't think it's predicated on whether you "wait" or not. I'd just give her the time she needs and, in the meanwhile, live my life as always. Do the things you enjoy, both alone and with others and don't let the consideration of her even be a factor. That certainly won't improve your chances. If anything, constantly pining for her will only hurt your chances. Just let her see through all of this what a fun, friendly guy you are. That'll raise her interest level and make you all the more attractive to her.

[valinors_sorrow]

She isn't dating material, in my opinion, since people need at least a year off after a serious involvement and if they don't... run! Dating a co-worker is equally unwise.

[Wildcat21]

Read the last 3 threads - (not mine) - these three have diagnosed this perfectly.

She needs time - give her space... maybe a COUPLE MONTHS!! Months!! Then surprise her one day with a short simple call.

I think you puched when she wasn't ready.