Check out some similar questions!

CrissyZ · Feb 11, 2009, 12:15 PM

My 22 year old daughter has moved out and back in 5 times. She can't keep a job. 9 jobs in 4 years. She lies so much I think she believes them herself. I confronted her when I found 2 items I had asked her about a number of times. Too many things to mention. She recently took around $700.00 worth of my sons xbox360 games that he worked to buy and pawned them. We were only able to find one of them. I changed the locks and codes and gave her her belongings. She's out. I haven't involved the police about the above or the money she steals. Did I do the right thing by basically kicking her out?? The stress was too much on all of us and we shouldn't have to deadbolt our bedroom doors when she is here. Couldn't sleep soundly when she was here. But now I'm sick with worry if she can make it on her own. Thanks for your time.

Justwantfair · Feb 11, 2009, 12:17 PM

This is the only way she will learn to make it on her own.

You have given ample opportunities for her to change her ways. Sometimes tough love is the only way out.

liz28 · Feb 11, 2009, 01:07 PM

She is lucky to still have her freedom because if it was mother she would've called the cops and had me arrested.

Also, as a mother I can understand your concern for her but maybe this is what she needed to wake her up. This is her wake up call.

DoulaLC · Feb 11, 2009, 01:16 PM

I think you did the right thing. I'd let her know you love her dearly and will help her in areas that you can, such as finding a place to live... but that because of passed actions you simply can not have her living in your home.

Tell when she has learned to make better decisions and be responsible for herself and her actions, you will welcome her home for visits with open arms.

N0help4u · Feb 11, 2009, 06:27 PM

Yes you did the right thing. If you allow her to stay things will only get worse.
Next it would be the TV she sold, then the computer and who knows where it would end. If she can steal your sons xbox and money she is capable of stealing anything, She is in denial and she most likely does believe her lies so as long as this is the way she deals with things it is only going to put a strain on the rest of your families lives and drag you down. Also your son doesn't need to grow up with the idea that you let her get away with things. He needs stability and to know that his things are safe in his home.

neverme · Feb 15, 2009, 06:50 PM

You absolutely did the right thing.

Reality is a tough pill to swallow but this is the only option she has left you with.

If it is at all possible stay in contact with her and support her emotionally. She IS still your child.

survivorboi · Feb 15, 2009, 06:57 PM

No, you did the right thing. Remember, your daughter is 22, she is old enough to take care herself and take care of you too! I don't mean to be too harsh, but if your daughter was responsible, she should be taking care of her family back.

You did the right thing. If it's stressing you out so much that it interfere you and your family with daily activities such as sleeping, then it is way too much.

The laws say that 18+ is responsible for his/her own actions; they are now independent of you.

Don't worry, she'll be fine =)

Fr_Chuck · Feb 15, 2009, 07:08 PM

OK we are in the children section, so I can say yes you did the right thing as a parent, but I may have also sued her for the value of the games she store from her brother. And worked at getting that back

But short of that if this was in the "legal" section, then while morally you did correct, legally you can not just lock her out and change the locks,
Now that is what I would have done to, but it just was not a legal eviction.

andrea_louise · Feb 20, 2009, 11:51 PM

You did the right thing by kicking her out, she needs to learn that the things she was doing is wrong. She is big enough and old enough to learn to stand on her own two feet and be able to take care of herself financially.
Don't feel guilty about putting her out, its not fair on you and the rest of the family being put under a lot of stress.

uvware · Feb 21, 2009, 12:56 AM

Yes, you did the right thing absolutely. My brother did this for years and my father didn't do a thing and to be quite honest it hurt my brother more. My brother was stealing for drugs.

When I came into his life I gave him two options (after he had sold almost everything in my father's house) live on the streets or go with to re-hab. He chose the right thing and has been sober for almost a year and a half.

You did the right thing not only for you and the rest of the family in the home but for your daughter.

I would tell my brother that I still loved him but did not love the drugs. Make it known that you love her but that you have a choice not to be pulled into her lifestyle.

twinkiedooter · Feb 21, 2009, 06:21 PM

Why was she stealing the stuff? Was it due to drugs on her part?

Peanuts825 · Feb 22, 2009, 01:58 AM

My daughter was doing that, stealing, lying.. I got sick of it all the time. I finally told her I was going to take her over and have a lie detecter test done on her.. that scared the Poo out of her, that's when I got the truth out of her.. Just pull a few threats on her.. it might make a difference