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CARING FATHER · Jan 25, 2009, 07:05 PM

I don't know where to start but here goes I am a 32 year old father of 4!2 mine 2 my wife's but are all 4 ours! I am lost when it comes to my oldest she is 7 and I find it hard to keep thoughts of her safety out of my head I love all for the same but for some reason she sticks out the most! It is hard for me to do any & everyday activities without worrying about her? I am not abusive I do not beat my children but I do scream every now and again!I am only human! Can this be the fuel behind my fear ? I am so lost and it is becoming more alarming I am scared and don't know why! Can anyone give me advise? Please!

jenn4094u · Jan 26, 2009, 06:58 AM

Excessive worry happens to a lot of people, and the best thing I can tell you is to see a doctor. I would recommend going to see a psychiatrist , as a family doctor may be able to treat you if it just anxiety, but if there is something else going on with you you want someone who will be more knowldegeable. If they feel you have a problem and suggest you treat it with medication, just know that it happeens to a lot of people and have an open mind about it.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 26, 2009, 08:24 AM

This is a dangerous world, and some worry is to be expected and normal

If the worry is getting to a point where it will not allow you to live a normal life or behave normally, you need to get counseling.

Choux · Jan 26, 2009, 08:34 AM

Sometimes a parent will have sexual feelings for a child, but he converts this unacceptable thought into overprotectiveness.

I would recommend some straight talk with a therapist.

Best wishes,

CARING FATHER · Jan 26, 2009, 01:28 PM

I am blown away by that comment! I would never and could never have sexual feelings towards my children! They are children and I AM NOT A PEDOPHILE!! My kids are everything to me and is what keeps me waking up everyday!I ask for advise from this site because my wife told me that there was intelligent people on here and this site has helped her in the pasts! But I don't see being called a child molester as being helpful?? Why would you think that? Where is your head? Unreal! I would really like you to quote in my post where I said I had sexual feelings toward my child I said I am at fear for her well being when I am not around but to set everyone strait I have not and will not picture my children in this manner! I am adult who's scared about thinking about my children being stolen from me or hurt or worse! I will not post to this site again!! And don't worry I will be receiving counseling again!been in and out since I was 13 and I am now 32 they can't tell me either they just give me meds. For anxiety!
Go figure I guess it isn't just mechanics out there thinking of job security because if you think about it what do meds. Do? Nothing just mask the pain! No heeling! Just masking and you have to go back every month for a check-up there is more money going to the "DR." and staff?? For them to say well no changes but here lets give you stronger meds. And we will see you back in a month!

Choux · Jan 26, 2009, 06:28 PM

Sorry you flew off the handle. I hope you feel better today.

I was just responding to your... "i am so lost and it is becoming more alarming i am scared and don't know why! can anyone give me advise? please!!"

I just made a suggestion to you because you are agitated.

Best wishes,

CARING FATHER · Jan 26, 2009, 06:35 PM

I am sorry if my post offended you! But be honest with me if some said that to you when you ask for advise how would you take it! I am 1 of a kind I can't explain why I am the way I am but I think my problem lies in over protecting my children and when they are not around I worry and the oldest just sticks out because she is my first born but I am not a dr. So maybe they can clear it up for me??

Choux · Jan 26, 2009, 07:33 PM

I think you should see a good therapist and reveal all your feelings, so you can get to the bottom of your emotional turmoil. That would be the best for you and your family. :)

Best wishes to you,

asking · Jan 26, 2009, 08:01 PM

You may be prone to anxiety already and the stress of taking care of 4 kids may be amping that up. But I agree with Choux that there may be other things that are contributing to your anxiety. I did not think she was suggesting you were a pedophile. She was giving an example of the kind of thing that might create such intense agitation as you are feeling.

I do hope you won't overprotect your daughter but instead let her have as much freedom as possible--despite your anxiety. Girls tend to be over protected as it is, and it would not be good for her to have even more.

You are right to want to deal with this now. If you don't, you will have a harder time when she gets older.

JudyKayTee · Mar 30, 2009, 12:56 PM

Originally Posted by Choux

Sometimes a parent will have sexual feelings for a child, but he converts this unacceptable thought into overprotectiveness.

I would recommend some straight talk with a therapist.

Best wishes,

Just out of curiosity - where did you do your mental health training? The distance from the question to the answer is one GIANT leap!

this8384 · Mar 30, 2009, 12:58 PM

You are completely out-of-line; where do you get off suggesting the OP has pedophile-like thoughts??

starbuck8 · Mar 30, 2009, 01:20 PM

How dare you incinuate this man having sexual feelings for his child. You got an accidental greenie today by the way!

JoeCanada76 · Mar 30, 2009, 01:56 PM

N/G