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Dare81 · Jan 13, 2009, 04:40 AM

So its been approximately 3 months since my girlfriend of 8 years broke up with me,its been almost a month and a half of nc.I feel a lot better then I used to at the beginning of the breakup .The problem I am having is that tomorrow is my birthday, I am not sure if she is going to call or not, probably not but if she does should I pick up or not?

Romefalls19 · Jan 13, 2009, 06:14 AM

Nope, it doesn't sound like you are over her so no need to pick at the scabs.

talaniman · Jan 13, 2009, 07:30 AM

Nope, why take a chance of messing up your healing?

Whether she calls or not, your probably going to freak out for a while any way, so fore warned is fore armed.

Do something good for yourself, and enjoy your birthday with family or friends

Happy Birthday by the way!!

zeeniee · Jan 13, 2009, 07:38 AM

Hi Dare 81,
Pull all the phones off the hook and switch your mobile off and have a nice birthday!

411Help · Jan 13, 2009, 07:41 AM

Happy birthday.

No, don't pick up your phone. This can possibly set you back to day one. Keep it up, your doing good.

kctiger · Jan 13, 2009, 08:18 AM

Clearly you shouldn't. Imagine now, how freaked out you would get if you talked to her. I mean, you are already freaking out at the idea of her calling...

Dare81 · Jan 13, 2009, 05:48 PM

Thanxs everyone.She hasn't called yet and even if she does I won't pick up

kctiger · Jan 13, 2009, 06:17 PM

Happy Birthday man!!

Yosomoton213 · Jan 13, 2009, 07:17 PM

I wouldn't expect the call. That would be setting yourself up for disappointment.

Then you'll get upset that she didn't call. Turn off your phone and have a good time. I used to do the same thing. It's a habit that you'll have to break. Even though it's your birthday.

Don't set yourself up for disappointment.

Dare81 · Jan 13, 2009, 07:59 PM

Originally Posted by Yosomoton213

I wouldn't expect the call. That would be setting yourself up for disappointment.

Then you'll get upset that she didn't call. Turn off your phone and have a good time. I used to do the same thing. It's a habit that you'll have to break. Even though it's your birthday.

Don't set yourself up for disappointment.

Cell phone has been off all day.Birthday wasn't too bad either, got to spend time with family and friends.

KC TIGER thanks man

kctiger · Jan 13, 2009, 08:00 PM

No problem! You keep your head up, and by the way, you seem to be doing awesome. Just keep moving forward. It is a new year for you now!

NorthernNiceGuy · Jan 13, 2009, 08:52 PM

Happy Birthday Dare! Keep fighting the NC fight!

Dare81 · Jan 14, 2009, 07:58 PM

So she didn't call yesterday, and I was fine all day yesterday, until this afternoon when I started felling down and depressed. I guess I was expecting a phone call but it would have only complicated matters further.

After 8 years, I can't even get a Happy Birthday!

411Help · Jan 14, 2009, 08:50 PM

Don't worry man.

You don't need one from her.

Maintain your strength, it'll get better, I PROMISE.

Dare81 · Feb 6, 2009, 01:08 AM

Almost 2 and half months of NC and today had to be one of the hardest days of NC.I was thinking about her all day even cried a little, shouldn't I be over her already.Is there a light at end of this tunnel?

zeeniee · Feb 6, 2009, 01:48 AM

Hi Dare81,

Wow! Two and half months- that is really good-you should be proud as NC is really hard to do- I look forward to such achievements!

I believe there will be good and bad days- as we heal and so I guess today is that bad day- but hopefully this will pass by and many more good days will come your way!

Keep going and keep smiling
Maybe you can break you the day and so something different which may help you switch off for a bit.

Dare81 · Feb 6, 2009, 04:12 AM

Originally Posted by zeeniee

Hi Dare81,

Wow! Two and half months- that is really good-you should be proud as NC is really hard to do- i look forward to such achievements!

I believe there will be good and bad days- as we heal and so i guess today is that bad day- but hopefully this will pass by and many more good days will come your way!

Keep going and keep smiling
Maybe you can break you the day and so something different which may help you switch off for a bit.

Thanks Zeenizee,

I think that today has to be the first time in the last couple of months where I have really missed her, even though I think about her everyday today was different. I wanted to give her a call but I know she is not the same person that I use to love.I hope she is doing okay.
Hopefully tomorrow is better.

kctiger · Feb 6, 2009, 06:43 AM

Originally Posted by Dare81

Thanks Zeenizee,

I think that today has to be the first time in the last couple of months where i have really missed her, even though i think about her everyday today was different. I wanted to give her a call but i know she is not the same person that i use to love.I hope she is doing okay.
Hopefully tomorrow is better.

It's like I have said many times. This journey is a roller coaster, ups, downs, twists, turns, corkscrews... all that stuff. When the ride is finally over and you pull up to that end... my friend, it is really worth it, and happiness will be there.

Carry on... :cool:

Irishgirl · Feb 6, 2009, 07:08 AM

As long as the good days keep outweighting the bad your doing brilliant, keep up the good work it'll take time but I'm sure looking back to 2 months you never thought you'd feel the way you do now

neverme · Feb 6, 2009, 07:11 AM

Some days are good, most I'm sure at this point.

But sometimes, you get hit with a smack in the face and it hurts like it did at the start but the sun will go down this evening and come back up tomorrow!

Just keep the NC going.. you'll kick yourself if you fall so far into the healing process.