[talaniman]

From my experience broke, but still working together beats being apart with a few buck in your pocket. Hang in there.

[Letitbeover]

I hear a lot about what you think she may want and what you want but really you need to think about the welfare of your children. You have a very good case to get custody of your children, including the 14 yr. old, however, sometimes the courts will side with what a 14 yr old wants herself. You have been the main caregiver for the children. You also have been the main provider. You can show the courts that they need to stay in the environment they are used to, friends, neighborhood, school, etc. I know you feel she may come back but the big word is "might". If she doesn't and you wait too long, it may be too late to fight the issue in court, again you must look out for the children. It doesn't matter if she is using you, not in your children's eyes. Believe me, children figure things out and also assume. The worse thing you could ever do is bad mouth their mother, instead support her, always. Even though your children may not see the light now, guaranteed they will and they will only resent you if you display bad behaviour, including, not fighting for them, seeing them, calling them. All you have to do, no matter what, whether you like the situations that may come up or not, is to think what's best for your children. In the end when they're about 18 or 20 they will understand you did all that you could do and believe me there are many more years after childhood that family is spent together. P.S. Keep the children completely out of the court/custody/support battle, even if they ask questions. Just say this is for the adults to deal with (not problem, not worry). Hope this helps and good luck!

[sully123]

It's OK to be broke, your family is home with you, that is the main thing. Things will turn around for you now! Were all suffering in some kind of way, financially, don't let that keep you down. Your heading in the right direction, now. Just keep that positive attitude on everything. Keep us updated too, were all pulling for you. Good luck.