Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    TrueFaith's Avatar
    TrueFaith Posts: 1,202, Reputation: 313
    Ultra Member
     
    #1

    Dec 6, 2008, 12:44 PM
    One thing I have learnt
    Hey guys.

    Just some thoughts of mine. And no its not me screaming or getting pisst off at people :)

    But the one thing I have learnt, in all my relationships.

    I use to really lose myself in them.. and I hated the person I became when I was in a relationship. I became this wimpy needy. Mess. All the stuff I scream at people not to be!
    Because I use to do it.

    And then as I went into more relationships I was like. Ok this time! I will change. And you know what I did.. for the first 6 months. Ha! Then the girl would be like
    Ohh you never open up!

    So I open up and lose myself again. Then guess what happens. --Yeahh your no fun anymore--


    Now I have learnt that. It is so important to have your own goals in life, and your own plans.
    Because you are working towards something, and when that happens. At least for me. Relationships
    Are not... the most important thing in my life. I find if I balance everything. Social and work together. It works out really well.

    You know the old saying. You can't keep putting wood on the fire. Or it will just burn out.

    Anyway I use to make my girls life. My life. Which is just awful..
    There is no guide to a healthy relationship in my view
    But I feel that if we do follow our life goals. No matter what bumps we hit in the road. Women.. family.. etc. if we keep on going we will get there.
    And at least for me. The bumps aren't that big when I know where I am going.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Dec 6, 2008, 01:26 PM

    Basically I have learned pretty much the same thing.
    Like I just left my boyfriend because I started realizing how much (as usual) I got wrapped up in what he wanted, when he wanted and lost myself (once again) in his needs. I started becoming someone that I always advise to avoid being. Like he had me crying a lot and just letting him believe he could always turn everything into being my fault.
    I have realized through the years that I am much happier on my own being independent and having my goals. Guys seem to distract me and then I get lost in their wants only.
    In the past couple days since I left him I have been thinking about when am I going to go visit my friends that I haven't seen for awhile, when am I going to catch up on my reading and my art, when am I going to get started on this project or continue working toward my goals.
    He was okay with me doing these things BUT he played these games like he wouldn't come home. Then when I didn't bother coming home because he never bothered coming home then he would start coming home and getting mad that I wasn't there,
    If you are right for each other there should be harmony and synchronicity without the confusion, problems and misunderstandings. You should both be working together toward your goals not smothering and suffocating each other to the point you hinder each other.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

At home jobs good thing? Or a bad thing? [ 5 Answers ]

I have a two month old little girl, and a job I have had for almost 4 years. When I first found out I was pregnant my boss and I sat down and discussed my future with the company. We decided that after my maternity leave I would come back part time (20 hours) until January of 2009. I am now back...

Break to reconciliation.can lessons be learnt? [ 8 Answers ]

I am 3 months split up from my ex.She ended the relationship.I initially tried to get back with her,told her I loved her,then walked away and have done total NC since.3 days ago I got a text from her out of the blue,saying she regretted the decision to end things,had thought a lot about her...

What have you learnt from using this site ? [ 142 Answers ]

What new facts, information or other things has this site taught you through researching answers or others posts ? For myself I have had an insight into: The Art market with the Paris Etching Society The arcane nature of the US tax system Some interesting Home repair and Plumbing tips...


View more questions Search