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    nasra's Avatar
    nasra Posts: 54, Reputation: 7
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Jul 3, 2006, 02:41 PM
    Hi Guys
    I am in a marriage at the moment that is'nt going anywhere. At the moment we are together, but when we are together it is as if I don't exist, I come home from work on a long shift and he is on his lap top. He cooks the dinner though and leaves it in the microwave for me, but that's it. I get in and have a shower heat up my food and sit and watch telly. Oh and he has constant phone calls from his family he is happy to chat to them all night. By then I'm in bed, because I usually have a early shift in the morning. At night he is after one thing, but is that what life and marriage is about. He is'nt affectionate with me only when he is after one thing, he connects affection with one thing. If he goes in the kitchen he gets himself something and does not ask me what I want. He never suggest if going out to even the park, or cinema or. On my days off I suggest something like even a stroll in the park but he makes a big fuss about it. It is as if he can't be bothered. Am I that vile. He is unemployed and is not looking for a job, saying he is looking for the perfect business opportunity, what opportunity if you have no money. When he is not with me he is travelling up to see his family mum an dad brothers sisters. This causes me to go back to my mums until he gets back which envolves me packing all the time. I feel as if the house we are living at isn't a home. Then he travells abroad visiting other families and looking at business opportunities, I feel as if he isn't really looking at my needs and wants. I am always asking him about starting for a family and that we have been married a while now. He does not care saying if it happens it happens. I've made appointment with fertility clinic but he always misses the appointments because he is constantly away. Guys am I wasting my time here shall I call it a day or shall I try harder.
    Northwind_Dagas's Avatar
    Northwind_Dagas Posts: 348, Reputation: 83
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    #2

    Jul 3, 2006, 02:45 PM
    1st: How much of this have you told him?

    2nd: Why in the world would you be trying to bring a child into a relationship that you do not want to be in? Having a child does NOT fix problems!
    Here_To_Help- Jon's Avatar
    Here_To_Help- Jon Posts: 97, Reputation: 26
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Jul 11, 2006, 01:48 PM
    For me - life is about getting what I want and need - it sounds like you are getting neither. Life is too short for you to settle for that. I suggest calling it a day and taking care of YOU.

    PS: Don't even think about a family until you've come to terms with the above. It is unfair and abusive to bring a child into a family that is not functional.
    nasra's Avatar
    nasra Posts: 54, Reputation: 7
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Jul 11, 2006, 02:00 PM
    Hi John,


    Thanks for that, you are right life is to short. I have decided to go for a divorce. I was in turmoil, and very sad and lonely, but now that I have decided what I am going to do, well it feels as if a large cloud has been lifted off me.:) take care
    Here_To_Help- Jon's Avatar
    Here_To_Help- Jon Posts: 97, Reputation: 26
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Jul 11, 2006, 02:03 PM
    So glad you are taking care of you and feeling empowered to do so. Keep that energy close... you will need it as you proceed down the road you've chosen. Keep us posted and use this forum as a resource if needed... best to you... JonB

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