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bdonaldh13 · Dec 1, 2008, 10:27 PM

I would like to adopt my girlfriends kid. How would I go about doing that? What kind of flags could be placed? How much could this cost me? The father has no rights to the child and don't want to be in the child's life. I have tooken on the roll of the father to my girlfriends kid and now we would like to put it down on paper and legalize it? Any info will help thanks.

liz28 · Dec 1, 2008, 10:48 PM

You two need to get married and in most states they require you to be married for at least one year.

Once this happens then you shouldn't have no problem adopting your girlfriend child especially since the father is willing to give up his rights. Until then the biological father does have rights to child even if he wishes not to use them.

JudyKayTee · Dec 2, 2008, 07:26 AM

Originally Posted by bdonaldh13

i would like to adopt my girlfriends kid. how would i go about doing that? what kind of flags could be placed? how much could this cost me? the father has no rights to the child and dont want to be in the childs life. i have tooken on the roll of the father to my girlfriends kid and now we would like to put it down on paper and legalize it? any info will help thanks.

The father DOES have rights, whether he uses them or wants them or not.

If he is willing to sign documentation for the Court - usually in the Court's format - and you have been married over a year in a stable relationship (which means first you have to marry and then you have to wait a year) you can file the adoption papers.

Cost? Depends on the area. People have posted that they've handled the entire adoption without an Attorney. Others have posted that the Court would not allow that.

Depends on where you are.

ScottGem · Dec 2, 2008, 07:48 AM

Originally Posted by bdonaldh13

the father has no rights to the child and dont want to be in the childs life. i.

What makes you say this? Getting rights terminated is a difficult process. So you need to determine whether is rights have been legally terminated or not.

As noted, FIRST you get married, then you hire a Family Law attorney to prepare the adoption. You can start shopping around for an attorney now and get an idea of the fees so you can save up.

Synnen · Dec 2, 2008, 08:34 AM

Actually, I have to say that some states do allow adoption proceedings to begin before marriage.

I know my sister's husband was able to sign adoption papers the same day they got married--they called it their "family" day, instead of their wedding.

However--if the father has no rights, then WHY were they terminated? Or is it just that the father has no custody?

Your best bet, regardless, would be to talk to a local family lawyer to get the details on how to go about this.

div2wice · Dec 5, 2008, 08:43 PM

Well unfortunately if the biological father has not yet signed over his parental rights, then he DOES have rights because he fathered the child. You will need to get the bio father to sign over these rights before you can adopt the child.
Most, if not all states require the step father to be married to the mother before he can adopt the child, so its not likely you'll be able to adopt until or unless you marry the mother.