[Jean65]

I have a 15 yr. and 13 yr. old boys. Father has told them they can go to court and live with him full time when older son turns 16. We currantly share 50/50 custody. They sleep on a couch at dad's and do not have their own room. They live in a 2 bedroom condo with 7 people. My son's have their own room at my house, I'm home full time on the weeks with me, they get more then they probably deserve with how they treat me. Will the court listen to what they want because their dad has manipulated them since divorce or keep it as is? How much power do the kids have?

[mishelly3]

Well its not that easy, if he wants to move there the judge will listen to the child if he 16 yrs or older, then the judge will appoint a child advocate and do and investigation of each others home and lifestyle.HE has to have his own room it's the law. The 13yr old they probably won't listen to. I would contact an atty if it pushed but I wouldn't be to worried.

Best of luck,

[cjonline]

What state? Here its not a law (for a 16yr old to have their own room) In fact at 13 and 16, as long as they are the same sex and the OP says they are, they can share a room until they move out.

Also the courts would be more likely to keep the boys together not split them up. 50/50 is pretty fair and I think the courts wouldn't change that unless something bad happened. Why should they? In fact given the way the father's home is the court might even say the father has too many people living there for him to have overnights. You never know with courts and Judges, they can be funny sometimes and do a 180 on you -- that is why you never go to a Judge if you don't have to.

That being said... Yes I think the court will listen to what the teens have to say but that doesn't mean that the Judge will give them what they want. If it feels to you that they Judge is going to give the father physical custody ask for a home study of each home and independent study on the children. A caseworker should then be involved. That will take time and give the Judge a real look into the kids and the homes. But if you haven't done anything, like use/sell drugs, beat the kids, kick them out, etc. then you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

[ScottGem]

In no US state can a minor child decide where to live. That decisions is made by a Family Court judge based on the best interests of the child. In no US state can a minor child INITIATE court action to modify custody arrangements.

However, some statements do provide the judge with guidelines on when they must listen to the child's desires and how much weight to place on it.

So, if the father wants the kids tolive with him, then he has to file the petition to change custody.

[div2wice]

They are old enough that the judge would seriously take their wants/needs into consideration. Living in a 2 bedroom place with 7 people is NOT the best living environment for them.
You would need to request an amendment to the current child custody, and request that the judge speak with the children to discuss their needs. To see where they want to live.
Yes, they can choose to go back with you if the judge believes its in their best interest, however they cannot choose where they want to live "just because". The judge will only change the agreement if he sees that living with you is better for them.

[Jean65]

Thank you everyone for the information your wrote. I do feel much better and pray it will never come to the point of going to court. I live in California and our judge has been known to be a J--k. I will ask for a home study of both houses. That was great advise.

Thank you again.

[cadillac59]

The kids have zero power. They can choose where to live at 18. That's it.

But yes, as they get older the court can and will listen to their preferences and give whatever weight thereto as the judge deems appropriate.

In my experience the courts tend to go along with a mature 16 year old's wishes.