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Ali3 · Nov 1, 2008, 09:46 AM

Recently, I saw this guy, that.. well.. we are always flirting with each other but nothing ever happens. I think he is just shy.. but he never makes any moves or anything but he has given me tons of signs that he has feelings for me.

I was with him after class this earlier this week and we were just talking and then I had him help me with Math, he is like a Math WIZ! So I told him... I have a test this week, can you help me out? So we went to the library on campus and when we were done... we were leaving and I was assuming we were just going to go our separate ways.. but he kept talking to me and then he said ohh man I forgot my keys.. and we were just heading around the corner from where the table was that we were sitting ( meaning, we were not that far from the keys... lol) and I turned towards him and said.. ohh well you should go back for them and he was like... "well are you coming"?

( I was thinking... you need me to come w/you to get your keys?) And I said... Umm.. do you want me to--- and then he was like... hold on, and he ran to the table got his keys and ran back. Maybe he was hoping I would go back with him so we could talk.. b/c we were already alone.. there was no one else around..

Anyway, long story short, we were walking out and a girl in one of my other classes stopped me and as we were talking... he was like alight well, I guess I will see you ladies later... and he left. Now part of me feels like... Should I have just blew off my friend and ran and caught up with him, rather then talk to her? It was not like he was acting like he wanted me to stick around. At the same time... he was not letting me leave. My friend was heading to class.. so it was not like we could go hang out or anything. So, really... I am feeling like... was it my fault this time... should I have just kept walking with him and not have stopped to say hello.

Maybe something between us finally would have been put out there. Its like I said... everytime we are alone and finally it seems we can just talk things out ( our feelings), something messes it up. EVERY TIME! And the other thing that gets me is that... he didn't invite me to do anything with him after, I mean... he was like walking with me and we were just walking and talking together, and it was so almost random... I was like thinking to myself... so do I go... or do you want me to stay with you, like go grab something to eat or something? It just felt, random.. like he was going to do something... and then it just didn't happen... AGAIN... =/

TrueFaith · Nov 1, 2008, 11:06 AM

I am sure there will be another chance my dear :).
And.. if he does like you.. I'm sure he feels that he misst his chance as well.. with that friend coming along.

I must say he acted very cool.
Keep on talking with him.
And see how things go.

If you want to make a plan.. like after you studie together go out for a bite to eat.
So come on lazy bones lets do something.

Good luck

talaniman · Nov 1, 2008, 04:11 PM

Relax, there will be more chances for you to talk. Math isn't over is it?

Ali3 · Nov 1, 2008, 05:57 PM

No, the Math class goes on through the start of December.

lmnotok · Nov 1, 2008, 08:13 PM

Hey, this is so fun, don't cha think? He acted cool, you play it cool too! Don't rush, sooner or later, things will be obvious if its meant to be. So enjoy!

Ali3 · Nov 2, 2008, 08:49 AM

Well.. part of me does not understand how he acted. I mean, Just because I stopped to say hello to someone, he is just going to bail. I think if he wanted to spend time with me, he would have just stayed. That was why I kind of started feeling like maybe it was my fault I didn't go after him... BUT, I was always told... never chase a guy; they chase you.

lmnotok · Nov 2, 2008, 09:58 AM

Hey hey, you Don't NEED TO UNDERSTAND his action!! What you've done was completely normal, just a hi to a friend. ITs HIM who is not comfortable with HIMSELF, that's why he just walked away. So, don't waste your time analyzing his action. Just do what you want, he'll try next time if he wants to spend time with you. And Don't CHASE A GUY, NEVER!

Ali3 · Nov 2, 2008, 03:51 PM

A lot of people that I have talked to about him and I, have just told me to go after him and for me to chase him, but I just can't do it. I mean, I have no problem with maybe offering an idea to do something or whatever, but I won't go chasing after him. That's his job in my opinion. But I do realize that if he is shy.. I may have to just make the first move...

NItEMArE129 · Nov 2, 2008, 07:17 PM

Personally, I think you're too caught up with waiting for HIM to make a move. There's no law saying that you can't make a move yourself... And you actually do need to understand a little about his actions. Even understanding if it was his attempt to make a move on you is good enough! If you don't read between the lines every once in a while, you're never going to see your chance. Next time, either try to make a move yourself or, when you think he's making one on you, just make a move back to him. Guys don't just make moves and have any girl just suddenly go out with them. It has got to be reciprocal.

Ali3 · Nov 7, 2008, 04:56 PM

Well.. although we have been crushing on each other for awhile. He is always listening in on my conversations, and sometimes I'll ask him to study a little after classes or whatever, and I would ask.. " hey you got acouple of min. to work on some stuff?" or something like that and he would always respond.. " I told you, I always have time for you" or something like that.

BUT... what bothers me about him and this started recently.. he started like almost.. putting himself down when we are together. I mean, is he fishing for me to compliment him or something? He is ethier putting himself down in front of me, or.. we were working on some science problems and you had to calculate them and stuff and when he would get the answer.. he would be like.. "ohh man, I am the man! Its fine, you can tell me I am Amazing!" So, I mean... I went along with it.. I said.. " Yes, Yes, I will admit, you are Amazing..lol"

I don't find that he says positive things all the time. Sometimes I think he is just using the whole reverse psychology thing, He would say... " I know you hate me but.."... and obviously NOT true... we are good friends, so he has to know that, that is not true.. so I would just tell him.. " Whatever, you know thats crazy, and not true." But it seems like he just wants to see if I will come out and say... ohhh you know I love you.. dont say something like that.

Or.. or he would just say little things about himself that are not good, and it seems like he just wants to see if I am going to sit there and say " Ohh... sweetie... thats not true.. dont say that about yourself... but to be honest... I am just not that kind of person. I am not at all saying I am not a person that gives praise when its needed.. If I think you deserve a compliment or praise.. I will go all out, and do everything under the sun to celebrate something good or whatever, but I just recently started to see that, this guy... he seems to be looking for compliments all the time... =/

Is he just insecure? He does not seem that way on the outside... but maybe that is how he really feels or something?

NItEMArE129 · Nov 7, 2008, 09:12 PM

My girlfriend has low self-esteem too. He might be one of the kind of people that fishes for compliments, it's true. If that's the case, you have to help him to learn how to get approval from himself. It's difficult, believe me. But if you don't fight for it, it's never going to happen right? So if you're convinced it's his self-esteem, work on it. If not, find out what it is.