 |
|
| Browse | Ask | Answer | Search | Join/Login |
|
|
||||
|
Halloween Poem Contest
:eek:Last year the one and only Magprob won the contest. No prizes, just the challenge of taking the BEST HALLOWEEN POEM title away from Mag! So go for it. Let it all hang out, gross, scary, funny... any style! Anything goes;)
Last submit should be on October 29th... This is last years winner, by Magprob: Glen The Monster by magprob copyright 2007 Deep from the bowls of a churning, burning hell Where a good man don't go and won't fare well Came crawling a monster so vile and indescribably mean It was all dressed up and ready for Halloween. It had one green horn poking from out of Its head It was dragging a carcass that smelled long dead Its claws were crusted with filth and dried blood And under Its toenails was unbelievable crud As It ran past me screaming It snarled and swiped I could tell that Its funky butt had never been wiped Its fur was matted and slimy, stinking of disease When It disappeared I could finally breath Carefully I followed the stench to the small town below What business could It have and where would It go? Down along main street the odor did whirl I quietly followed afraid I might hurl Then again I spied It on the corner of main and third It was squatting and eating the bones of a dead bird When suddenly It jumped and like a flash It ran Down through the ally knocking over a garbage can I took a short cut around the block as fast as I could Thinking to myself this may come to no good I hid in the bushes watching as quiet as a mouse That's when I saw It walk up to the house Cautiously It approached and then knocked on the door It stood there waiting, waiting for a minute or more Then dear ole Miss Smith open up and did appear That was the moment I froze in complete fear Trick or Treat! It screeched at the top of its raspy voice Miss Smith let out a laugh and said “take your choice” It took the bowl and with one finger It stirred round It stirred till finally Its favorite was found It handed her the bowl, grunted and ran straight towards me That 's when I finally could no longer hold my pee Five paces from me it stopped and It sheepishly said “Oh yummy Me love dem LemonHead!” |
||||
|
||||
|
Time to go Trick or Treat My web is empty nothing to eat The bats ate my bugs, all gooey green So time to eat candy on Halloween It's the time of the year, when I can crawl safely- When people won't scream and say that they hate me- Crawling around without fearing a squishing The time of the year I go about wishing.. Happy Halloween! to the ghouls and the goblins The witches and vampires in their old wooden coffins So watch out for the Spyder or I'll eat out your brain I'll be back in my web on the following day Happy Halloween! |
||||
|
||||
|
Done! A Trick For a Treat By Magprob Copyright 2008 Little Jimmy knocked at the spooky old house Dressed in his costume just like Micky Mouse Patiently he waited for someone to open the door Then heard foot steps shuffle across the floor Feeble fingers fumbled at the lock and the latch Out poked a head wearing a crusty old eye patch His teeth were yellow, the few that were there Little Jimmy thought he saw bugs in his hair The dirty old creep eyed Jimmy with a frown Hacked up a loogie then swallowed it back down He scratched his butt and then picked his nose Then asked Jimmy, “You're a rat I suppose? “I'm Micky Mouse, not a rat!” Jimmy said The creepy old bugger just scratched his head “Well, I won't be giving a treat without a trick So do what you do and by damn be quick” “I don't know any tricks” as he stepped back Feeling as if the old creep was setting a trap The old creep reached and grabbed Jimmy tight Pulling him into the house as dark as the night “Then if you can't do a trick in trade for a treat I'll give a Hershey bar if you will just rub my feet” He pulled off his sneakers that were crusty and worn The first thing Jimmy saw was a three inch corn The corn was attached to the side of his big toe With smaller warts and corns every half inch or so His toe nails were long and twisted and green And his toes were caked with toe jam all in between Jimmy took one sniff then turned green then blue He ran and dove out the window and away he flew The old creep laughed a belly laugh that all could hear Then shook his head, turned up the TV and cracked a beer |
||||
|
||||
|
T'was All Hallows Eve, and what should appear, A shiny big cooler, with spirits... and beer! With I in my boxers and a date on her back, We both settled in for a night in the sack. When what to my dismay at the door did appear, A goblin, a witch, and small creatures to fear! I jumped to my feet, as the doorbell was ringing, I saw kids with bright bags, was there something they're bringin? They yelled trick or treat, these goblins and ghouls, Surely they must be beggars, should they not be in school? I asked what their tricks were, just to be sure, They said we want candy, are you stupid, old sir? I said I have no candy for you my small lad, I may have some apples, but they just might be bad. The eyes of the goblins welled up with tears, It's not apples we want, it's that cooler of beer. The shiny beer cooler, and the ghouls so sad, If it gets rid of these kids, it can't be all bad. I explained with a sly glance, it's patience I lack, Go play tricks on the neighbors, I've got a girl in my sack. :p |
||||
Not your question?
Ask your question
View similar questions
| Question Tools | Search this Question |
Add your answer here.
Check out some similar questions!
Contest a will
[ 3 Answers ]
Hello! I am from Rumania. A week before we understood that my father-in-law's cousin has died at NY. He was an american citizen with no children and close relatives. He made a will giving all to a NGO in Rumania. He is in dept of his uncle (my father-in-law's father) who helped him. What we can...
Contest a will?
[ 8 Answers ]
If you live with someone and they have a lawyer draw up a will leaving me 1/3 of His house upon his death can his 2 children fight that?
Non Contest Divorce
[ 3 Answers ]
I'm A Gay Woman And I Married Out Of Pressure Can I Get A Non Contest Divorice
Contest a will?
[ 6 Answers ]
My moms dad married a woman 4 yrs ago she says he's leaving everything to her and she is selling it all does my mom have the right to contest his will for a share of his property?
View more questions Search
|
