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    Chery's Avatar
    Chery Posts: 3,666, Reputation: 698
    Gone, But Not Forgotten
     
    #1

    Jun 3, 2006, 06:44 PM
    The Renunion
    Hi folks, here's another cute one...

    =: The Renunion :=

    Two men were sitting next to each other at a bar. After a while, one guy looks at the other and says "I can't help but think, from listening to you, that you're from Ireland."

    The other guy responds proudly "Yes, that I am."

    The first guy says "So am I. And where about from Ireland might you be?"

    The other guy answers "I'm from Dublin, I am."

    The first guy responds "Sure and begora, and so am I. And what street did you live on in Dublin?"

    The other guy says "A lovely little area it was, I lived on McCleary Street in the old central part of town."

    The first guy says "Faith and it's a small world, so did I.!
    So did I. And to what school would you have been going?"

    The other guy answers "Well now, I went to St Mary's of
    course."

    The first guy gets really excited and says. "And so did I.
    Tell me, what year did you graduate?"

    The other guy answers "Well, now, let's see, I graduated in 1964."

    The first guy exclaims "The Good Lord must be smiling down upon us! I can hardly believe our good luck at winding up in the same bar tonight. Can you believe it, I graduated from St Mary's in 1964 my own self."

    About this time, Vicky walks into the bar, sits down, and orders a beer.

    Brian, the bartender, walks over to Vicky, shaking his head and mutters "It's going to be a long night tonight"

    Vicky asks "Why do you say that, Brian?"

    "The Murphy twins are drunk again."

    [author unknown]




    Nez's Avatar
    Nez Posts: 557, Reputation: 51
    Senior Member
     
    #2

    Jun 4, 2006, 04:36 AM
    Paddy is about to go into his favourite pub,when this nun grabs his shirt,and says "drink is evil.You will be damned for ever"
    Paddy replies "what are you talking about woman..have you ever drunk alcohol?"
    "No I have not" replies the nun "it's evil"
    "Dont talk stupid" says Paddy "I tell you what,let me buy you a drink,then if you dont like it,then you can say what you like"
    "All right" says the nun "but what do woman drink?"
    "Let me get you a vodka,and tonic" says Paddy.
    The nun agrees,so off goes Paddy into the pub,where he walks up to the bar.He relates the story to the barman,as he orders the drinks.
    "Jesus wept" replies the barman "is that annoying drunken nun still waiting outside?" :D

    (Dave Allen,great Irish comedian)
    fredg's Avatar
    fredg Posts: 4,926, Reputation: 674
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jun 4, 2006, 04:52 AM
    Here's another:
    Two old women were sitting in a car in a Used Car lot, at 2 am.
    A Policeman stopped and asked, "You ladies having car trouble?"
    One said, "No".
    The Policeman said; "Then why don't you go home...it's very late".
    One old lady said, "We can't drive".
    Policeman: "Whose car is this?"
    "It's ours, of course".
    Policeman: "Then why are you just sitting here?"
    One old lady said: "Well, someone told us that if we bought a car here, we would be screwed".
    The other old lady said: "We're just waiting!!"

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