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    Chery's Avatar
    Chery Posts: 3,666, Reputation: 698
    Gone, But Not Forgotten
     
    #1

    Jun 2, 2006, 06:47 PM
    The Real Meaning of Advertising
    =: The Real Meaning of Advertisements :=

    New -- different color from previous design.
    All New -- parts are not interchangeable with previous
    design.
    Exclusive -- imported product.
    Unmatched -- almost as good as the competition.
    Foolproof Operation -- no provision for adjustments.
    Advanced Design -- the advertising agency doesn't understand it.
    It's Here At Last -- rush job. Nobody knew it was coming.
    Field Tested -- manufacturer lacks test equipment.
    High Accuracy -- unit on which all parts fit.
    Futuristic -- no other reason why it looks the way it does.
    Redesigned -- previous flaws fixed, we hope.
    Direct Sales Only -- factory had a big argument with
    distributor.
    Years of Development -- we finally got one to work.
    Breakthrough -- we finally figured out a use for it.
    Maintenance Free -- impossible to fix.
    Meets All Standards -- ours, not yours.
    Solid State -- heavy as heck.
    Less Fattening -- now it doesn't have the same fat content as pig stomach lining.
    High Reliability -- we made it work long enough to ship it.
    Non Refundable -- we couldn't make it work long enough to ship it.
    Fat Free -- you pay for the food, but the fat is free.
    [author unknown]

    How true, but still funny.
    valinors_sorrow's Avatar
    valinors_sorrow Posts: 2,927, Reputation: 653
    I regard all beings mostly by their consciousness and little else
     
    #2

    Jun 2, 2006, 08:19 PM
    Hahaha!

    Having been sort of in the profession before, those were good, Chery!

    I would only add:
    NO ASSEMBLY REQUIRED -- you'll need your next door neighbor's kid to explain how to operate it. Twice.
    fredg's Avatar
    fredg Posts: 4,926, Reputation: 674
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jun 3, 2006, 05:07 AM
    Very Good.

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