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mr_X · May 5, 2006, 09:04 AM

In today's society I have found it very difficult to find a woman that likes herself most of the girls I've dated have had a significant amount of flings to relationship ratios and most of them tend to tell me these things without me asking its almost as if most of them have a guys mind like they are trying to lure me in with macho talk.one of them told me she has had 5 boyfriends but slept with 26 guys have the table turned in today's society are women switching roles?I was very stunned by this ratio someone help me with this please.

RickJ · May 5, 2006, 09:49 AM

I think that statistically speaking, men will always be more prone to "sleeping around" than women, but since the "sexual revolution" the ratio has become closer.

A lot has to do too with where you're meeting these gals. If you feel like "most of them" are like you describe, then I highly suggest re-thinking where you go to meet girls.

Just my 1.5¢ on it...

Wildcat21 · May 5, 2006, 03:29 PM

Why on earth do you let that bother you?? That's the past!! Ou can't change the past... only what you do now.

Sounds like yo uhave some trust issues.

RickJ · May 5, 2006, 04:33 PM

I don't frequent this board much, but since my friend WC has disagreed, let me be sure I am clear.

If the majority of women you are meeting
1. have no problem telling you about all of their "flings", and
2. are trying to impress you with the number of their escapades, then

You're looking in the wrong place for a real relationship.

With that said, I will unsubscribe from this thread.

Good luck to you Mr. X.

phillysteakandcheese · May 5, 2006, 09:29 PM

I have to agree with Rick on this one. It sounds like you're fishing in a bad pond.

The world is pretty diverse, and there are many women that span the range from amusement ride to perfectly preserved. You're in the amusement park looking at "rides".

jeffatl · May 6, 2006, 01:47 AM

Originally Posted by rickj

I don't frequent this board much, but since my friend WC has disagreed, let me be sure I am clear.

If the majority of women you are meeting
1. have no problem telling you about all of their "flings", and
2. are trying to impress you with the number of their escapades, then

You're looking in the wrong place for a real relationship.

With that said, I will unsubscribe from this thread.

Good luck to you Mr. X.

Easy, easy. Wildcat is right on this one, but that shouldn't get you hot and bothered... Somethimes people let their own insecurities get in the way of something that can really go somewhere. I agree that he has no place to get upset about her past because its her PAST. It kind of comes down to that old saying "if you dont want to know, DONT ASK!". Also, if this is really a big issue with you, then don't date her... plain and simple. That's your choice, no problem there. Guys get so insecure with women that have had... I would say more than like 3 or 4 partners, but the thing is... most of the time its just sex. Personally, I would be a lot more worried about a girl that is in and out of relationships than one that had been with a few guys. If you like this gal, then get over it. If you cant, that's cool... but move on.

fredg · May 6, 2006, 04:12 AM

Hi, Mr X,
Having been married now for 29 yrs, and remembering many years ago about dating, I still think roles are basically the same.
I have read and heard that men are twice as likely as women to want sex more often.
One can make more friends in a month by listening to others, than it would take in a year having them listen to you. Seems like you are following this, listening to other girls tell you about their sexual expoits.
Personally, I never was too crazy about a girl who told me she had slept with many other men, and was wondering what I was like! I avoided girls like that.
You can choose what type of girl you want to keep dating, and if this is the type you want, then forget about her past, and be interested in her now.
If you don't like this type, then don't ask her out, or don't ask her out the second time.
Not all women will tell you their sexual history! Those are the ones who are not bragging, who are interested in you. That's the women I would be dating.
They may tell you later, when you get involved in a relationship, about their past, but not right off.
I do wish you the best, and you can choose! Where are you looking for women? As another answer stated, that too, can make a difference.

Myth · May 6, 2006, 09:06 AM

It could also very much depend on the age of the women too. You must remember that women don't reach their sexual peak until much later than men. That said, I don't think that too much has changed in society just that women are more open to being honest about their sexuality than used to be acceptable.

valinors_sorrow · May 7, 2006, 05:19 AM

I hope to add some thought to this without drawing the ire of the feminist crowd. It seems to me that some women, on their way to what they think is liberation, simply duplicate some of the worst of the male behaviors they have witnessed - which includes sexual bragging as a means to attract. Advertised promiscuity is never a good thing in my book for either gender. Acquiring reasonalble sexual experience which is appropo to one's values is a private thing. It still remains that the real winners don't kiss and tell, last I looked, even for the sexually seasoned. I think your database may be a bit skewed Mr X, and like the others, I would suggest a broader subject base?

love and be loved · May 7, 2006, 06:54 AM

wild cat and jeffatl I think you are right it is the past but it is a bit weird that the girl would just randomly admit that fact with no reson
as though it is a good thing and would make him like her more

love and be loved · May 7, 2006, 06:57 AM

Valinors sorrow I aggre 100 persent well put

love and be loved · May 7, 2006, 07:05 AM

Sorry fredg meant to post that under jeffatl

Fr_Chuck · May 7, 2006, 07:08 AM

I would say a few things after reading and thinking about it.

First, no most women are not going wild and having sex as they please, if anything it was a little more wild during the 70's but as these people matured they discovered they no longer wanted to even admit it, and most certainly never bragged about it, it was still private although more free.

But I would say and agree, if you are only seeing women who are out there bragging about how many sex partners they have had, you are certainly not in places where you should be. You must be in bars, night clubs and hanging in the hood with hoocie mommas. If you are in the right level of society, you may find ladies that have made some poor judgements in boyfriends and perhaps did sleep with a few other men. These ladies will not brag about it, yes, when you start to get serious they may feel it is important to discuss your and their past, but far from bragging.

So I believe you need to take a serious look first at yourself, where in the social economic level of society are you, and where are these women you are discussing. And if you really don't like what you find, look in other areas.

talaniman · May 7, 2006, 09:25 PM

You must like those wild free ladies because you keep choosing them so find out why a certain type appeals to you so much. You need to know yourself so you can figure out what you want! :cool: :D

jeffatl · May 7, 2006, 09:31 PM

A lot of times people just think that's the thing that you want to hear, or they are just a bit too open with their sexual lives... I don't know what to tell you really, but if it bothers you that's OK. Just move on.

Myth · May 8, 2006, 12:14 AM

It could also be part of the "reaction factor". Kind of like if he can handle this he's going to be able to handle my wild side... The question you have to ask yourself is do you actually want to stick around for that wild side and possible std's or do you want to try fishing in another pond.

mikeb270 · Mar 6, 2008, 01:45 PM

Sounds like sloppy seconds too me...
Or would that be sloppy 35ths

jeffatl · Mar 6, 2008, 02:18 PM

Almost a 2 year old post. How did you even find this?

Justme76 · Aug 5, 2008, 09:19 PM

I know this is a few years old, but somehow I ran acrossed it while doing a search for something else and had to respond. I have to say that in today's world women are becoming more like men. I guess you could say some of us do it because it makes us feel powerful and in control, like we now have the upper hand. Women who sleep around are labeled as sluts or whores, while men who sleep around are considered to be Macho or cool. None the less, women today are becoming more business/career oriented so don't have the time to keep up with relationships, therefore if its easy for a guy to sleep around and move on, why can't women do the same. I don't speak for all women and not all of us are that way. I think by being honest up front, these are women that aren't looking for something serious, there just looking for fun or maybe an excuse to scare you away because there not interested.