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sammy76 · Jul 28, 2008, 09:02 PM

Hey everyone,
I'm 16 and pretty, I'm not overweight but I think there may be something with my personality because guys always like someone else! I'm a nice person but maybe something might turn them off because the guys I like never really like me? Guys like me but never the ones I like. Its becoming a problem because I've been single for ages and really want a boyfriend. A guy I like is dating one of my best friends and I think they're nearly broken up and I like him but I can't do that to her!

Guys always only like me for a fling or something or hook up but I don't think they are ever looking for a relationship. Is it just me? Or guys in general?

I really need some help and advice.
Thanks

KissMe10der · Jul 28, 2008, 09:12 PM

Looks are the first thing people see, but who wants to actually date someone for their looks. Don't be desperate either, which means don't get a boyfriend just for the sake of a boyfriend. Don't do that to your friend. I hate girls like that.

Maybe you come on too strong, just be who you are and relax. Maybe, you are looking into the wrong crowd. Go on dates, have fun get to know these guys. Who knows they could turn into something worth while.

sammy76 · Jul 28, 2008, 09:28 PM

I know guys don't just like people for looks but I just thought I'd say it to show that it can't be my looks turning them off!

Always_helping · Jul 28, 2008, 09:44 PM

Originally Posted by sammy76

hey everyone,
im 17 and really really pretty. i know it sounds vain but it is to help with my question. anyway, im stunning, not overweight but i think there may be something with my personality because guys always like someone else!! i'm a nice person but maybe my humour or something might turn them off because the guys i like never really like me? guys like me but never the ones i like. its becoming a problem because ive been single for ages and realy want a boyfriend. a guy i like is dating one of my best friends and i think they're nearly broken up and i like him but i can't do that to her!

i realy need some help and advice.
thanks

I must say that not all the boys in your age group are ready to have a 17 year old girlfriend. I am not saying what age of guy you should be dating but you may want to take that into consideration.

Also glad you said that you really "want" a boyfriend. If you had said that you really "need" a boyfriend, then I would be really concerned.

Also, another poster mentioned about looking in different places (this is a good strategy).

I wish you the best.

Rabbit91 · Jul 28, 2008, 10:05 PM

Originally Posted by sammy76

hey everyone,
im 17 and really really pretty. i know it sounds vain but it is to help with my question. anyway, im stunning, not overweight but i think there may be something with my personality because guys always like someone else!! i'm a nice person but maybe my humour or something might turn them off because the guys i like never really like me? guys like me but never the ones i like. its becoming a problem because ive been single for ages and realy want a boyfriend. a guy i like is dating one of my best friends and i think they're nearly broken up and i like him but i can't do that to her!

i realy need some help and advice.
thanks

Aight Hawt girls are HaWt.

Personalites? Hmm..

I can't tell you how many "HaWt girls" I've turned down because their 'mirror was in check' but not their 'personality.'

Don't be mean, be nice/respectful/be fun etc..

Alty · Jul 28, 2008, 10:06 PM

Okay, I'm going to give you some advice, but don't be too upset. I have a 21 year old cousin, very pretty, and that's the first thing you notice about her, not because she's prettier than everyone else, but because she constantly lets you know that she's pretty. She'll put down other people, right to their face, saying things like "Oh, I'm allot prettier than you, I like my clothes better, and I definitely have nicer hair, don't you think so? " She doesn't realize that what she's saying is hurtful. Could it be you're doing that?

Talk to your friends, to boys that you know and ask them what they think, tell them to be honest and then accept that honesty.

Good luck.

sammy76 · Jul 29, 2008, 01:41 AM

Oh no! I never go around saying things like that, I know what its like when other people say that and its very annoying and uncomfortable situation when people do that.

L Invencible · Jul 29, 2008, 02:23 AM

Hello, I see that there is many things you need to learn and understand about life, I like to tell you that the first thing that will help you is to learn more about yourself then read as may as you can literature about self-development then start by look in others the best side of life, you are very young now and at 17th. Birthday many things wondering why this and that, read meanningful books on how personality is create and how we can ajust to it and mold the circunstance to be asertive with your pourpose for life.

sammy76 · Jul 29, 2008, 04:18 AM

I'm 16 and my mother thinks we are really close but I find it hard to talk about personal issues including dating. I've dated before but not that she's known about.
My brothers also try to be really protective so that makes it hard. But its really difficult foe me to date and go out with guys and stuff when I'm not allowed to date.
Any advice please?

tickle · Jul 29, 2008, 05:27 AM

Advice I can gi ve... talk to your mom about dating and over protective brothers. Do you really feel comfortable dating behind your mom's back? What if something happened and she didn't know ?

ScottGem · Jul 29, 2008, 05:32 AM

Present yourself to your mom as a mature teen. At 16 its not unreasonable to be dating. Let mom set some ground rules like meeting the boys first and where you can go, Gradually, these restrictions can be removed as you prove yourself.

N0help4u · Jul 29, 2008, 08:23 AM

At your age many kids are into the looks, the material and physical things and bypass anything that doesn't live up to their material standards... that is their lose. Like L Invencible said work on you being the best you and one day people will see your true inner beauty.

brkfstatiffs · Jul 29, 2008, 10:28 AM

Talk to your mom she wants to be there for you. She can also probably give you a lot of good advice about girls and women. It doesn't sound like she wants to be so protective of you, she just wants to be cool with you and let you know you can talk to her about anything. Maybe the next time you and your mom hang or go to dinner etc, say something like "ohh that gir;'s cute for me what do u think mom?" break the ice that way, so it's not akward.

JBeaucaire · Jul 29, 2008, 11:31 AM

If you want your relationship with your Mom and your brothers to be more mature, that takes intentional, uncomfortable work. Left to its own development, your relationships with them will stay the same, Mom will always be a little distant and the brothers will be a little too over-protective.

The only way to change that is on purpose. You'll have to suck it up and push through the awkward to start talking to them about adult topics. Talking to them about things that make them uncomfortable will go badly at first. You'll have to bring it up, let them respond badly, then point out that you NEED them to be more mature and talk about these things with you. You think family is a safe environment and want to be able to discuss adult issues with them, so you need them to do better next time.

It's a little guilt here and there that adjust our behaviors. You standing there telling them you NEED to be able to talk to them about boys and sex and relationships is a NEED you have should get them slowly moving in the right direction.

Give it time, but start the process, and push through the awkward.

x0-Rachel · Jul 29, 2008, 11:40 AM

Your 16 now, your mother most likely knows that you will soon be or already have dated. Mothers know more than you give them credit for. Approach your mother, and let her know that you value your relationship, and that to be closer you want to be able to tell her personal Things. Perhaps you should start by asking her how she would feel if you did date/have a boyfriend. I hope this helps :)

Rabbit91 · Jul 29, 2008, 01:31 PM

Your 16.. prime years of dating man! Those are your "puppy love" years.

I would do the same as you are.

Fr_Chuck · Jul 29, 2008, 01:33 PM

First get your mom's permission and talk to her, part of being mature and old enough to date is being able to express and talk and make some harder choices. Sneaking around behind her back is not the way to gain her trust

brazilia · Aug 1, 2008, 03:45 AM

Originally Posted by Rabbit91

Your 16.. prime years of dating man! Those are your "puppy love" years.

I would do the same as you are.

Actually I agree with what rabbit saying your just trying to relate to her.

brazilia · Aug 1, 2008, 03:47 AM

Originally Posted by sammy76

im 16 and my mother thinks we are really close but i find it hard to talk about personal issues including dating. i've dated before but not that she's known about.
my brothers also try to be really protective so that makes it hard. but its really difficult foe me to date and go out with guys and stuff when im not allowed to date.
any advice please?

Well don't tell her anything,find someone that your comfortable talking with.most teennagers find it helpful talking to another adult besides family meember.. do you know anyone?

sammy76 · Aug 1, 2008, 10:47 PM

I was just wondering if guys like girls wearing make-up?
Or how much they like girls to wear?
I'm 16 and a half and curious if if I should stop wearing it as it may be a turn off?
Please help